


Snapshots of a Married Life

by blackimpala



Series: Black Feather [3]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Bottom!Cas, But only a little, Domestic Fluff, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Human Castiel, M/M, Married Life, Men of Letters Bunker, Post-Season/Series 10 Finale, Smut, Switching, Top!Cas, bottom!Dean, not kinky, top!dean, vanilla sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-12
Updated: 2018-09-24
Packaged: 2019-03-30 09:20:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 71,416
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13948560
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blackimpala/pseuds/blackimpala
Summary: Life keeps going on, and so does hunting. Dean and Cas have managed to have some sort of normal life in between hunts, but they are getting older, and hunting is starting to get harder. Even though they are both happy and satisfied with their life, a tiny part of them wants to have a fully normal life and retire. and that part is starting to grow bigger with every hunt.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Here's the third and final part of the Black Feather series. Sorry for the long waiting. This is still set after the season 10 finale, diverging from some events of season 11, just a reminder. Anyway, this is going to be shorter than the previous two, no longer than 15 chapters, maybe there'll be even less. When I thought about writing this part, I was thinking about writing chapters that just showed some scenes, without too much plot, but I ended up developing some plot because I want this story to have a closure.
> 
> So here it is. I'll try to update every two weeks or so. I hope you enjoy it :)

“Don’t you dare leave this bed,” Castiel warns with a sleepy voice and tightening his arms around Dean.

Dean groans. After all this time, he should know that he can’t leave bed without Cas noticing. “Cas, I really have to go to the bathroom,” Dean protests, turning his face so he can look at his husband, who still has his eyes closed. “I can’t wait any longer.”

His embrace tightens even more. “Yes, you can.”

“No, I fucking can’t. So unless you want me to make a mess in our bed, I highly suggest you to let me go to the bathroom. I promise I’ll be quick and I’ll come back.”

Castiel sighs and opens one eye. “Promise?”

Dean’s frustrated expression melts into a soften one. “Dude, do you even have to ask?”

Castiel sighs. “Okay.” He pulls his hands away and sets Dean free, who quickly gets up from bed and walks towards the door. “Don’t delay.”

Dean rolls his eyes and he almost runs to the bathroom because he can’t hold any longer. The bunker is quiet and his barefoot make sounds against the cold floor. Sam and Charlie are still sleeping. Dean knows none of them will wake up until quite late in the morning. Somehow they decided to make a marathon of _Game of Thrones_ and they went to bed quite late.

After relieving himself, Dean washes his hands and almost runs back to the bed. The bunker feels chilly and his body is missing the warmth of his husband and their bed. The moment he opens the door, Cas shoves the bedspread and sheets away and Dean gets back inside, this time facing Cas so they can hold each other.

“Was that fast enough for you?” Dean asks with a mocking voice.

“You could have been faster,” Castiel answers, drawing Dean a little bit closer.

Dean rolls his eyes and chuckles. “You’re unbelievable.”

“I just want you in bed with me for as long as possible, there is nothing wrong about that, so don’t criticize me.”

“I only criticize your lazy ass.”

Castiel opens his eyes and scowls him. “I want to divorce you.”

Dean arches his eyebrow and gets his elbow on the pillow, resting his cheek on his hand and looking at Cas. “Oh yeah? Because I want to divorce you because you stained my shirt the other day.”

“You have the whole color set of flannels, Dean, get over it.”

“You dick,” Dean says, grinning. Castiel immediately grins and they are soon kissing, sweetly, humming happily into it. “I love you so fucking much, did you know that?” he asks when he pulls away to breathe again.

Castiel moans into their next kiss. “I think I might have a slight idea.”

Dean gives him a sassy look. “You’re a little shit.”

“And you are an assbutt,” Castiel says, his face having more sass than Dean’s. “And I love you so damn much, too.”

“Really? I had no clue about that.”

Castiel shoves him away, playfully and Dean can’t help laughing. “I can’t believe I gave up Heaven for you.”

In the past, Dean would have been upset about that statement, even if he knew that Cas was teasing, but part of him would have felt bad that Cas gave up everything just for him, but now, he loves that. He still can’t believe that a celestial being so fucking powerful left his powers and everything just for him, but Dean has already accepted that and doesn’t feel worthless of such thing.

Dean cups Castiel’s face and kisses him, tenderly. “It’s the best fucking choice you’ve ever made and you know it.”

Castiel smiles, and it is that beautiful smile he only makes for Dean. “Yes, it is.” He gets his arms around Dean’s neck and pulls him into another kiss.

They keep making out for a while, kissing and touching, until they end up holding each other again. Dean closes his eyes and enjoys having Cas close. He would never get tired of this.

It isn’t surprising that Cas falls asleep again, eventually. Dean smiles and closes his eyes, drifting to sleep a few moments later, only waking up when his stomach starts to growl, wanting him to feed it. Normal people tend to use alarms to wake up. Dean doesn’t need that because he has his stomach.

He rolls onto his back and rubs his eyes. He sighs and then he looks at Cas, who is still sleeping and fisting Dean’s t-shirt. Dean smiles and grabs Cas’ hand, moving it towards his lips and he kisses his knuckles. The motion seems to awake Cas because he stiffs.

“Good morning, sunshine,” Dean says in a soft voice. He grins as he watches Cas blink and rub his eyes with his free hand.

“Is it time to wake up?” Castiel asks, quite unhappy.

“More like time to eat because my stomach is complaining.” His thumb caresses Castiel’s knuckles. “I’m thinking about making some pancakes, bacon and eggs. How does that sound?”

“Great,” he answers smiling. “But I would also add two cups of coffee to all of that.”

Dean chuckles. “Only two?”

Castiel glares him and sits down on the bed. His bed hair is really strong this morning and Dean loves it. He yawns and rubs his eyes again. “I hate mornings.”

Dean sits as well. “I know you do.” He kisses his cheek and lets Cas’ hand go. “Let’s make bed and then I’ll go to the kitchen and start with the food while you go to the bathroom. Does that sound alright?”

“Yeah.” He smiles.

They make their bed and then Dean goes to the kitchen and Castiel goes to the bathroom. Dean isn’t surprised to find that neither Sam nor Charlie is awake yet. Those two always wake up when the smell of coffee or pancakes gets to their bedrooms.

By the time Cas arrives to the kitchen, Dean is already making the batter for the pancakes. As the ex-angel passes next to him, walking towards the coffee machine, he caresses the small of Dean’s back, earning him a sweet smile from the hunter.

Cas always makes coffee. He is great at it. Dean doesn’t know what his secret is, but no one in the bunker knows how to make a coffee as great as Castiel.

Dean can’t help smiling when Cas sighs happily after drinking his first morning coffee in just one sip. Everyone knows that most of the times, Cas can’t deal with anyone unless he has drunk his first mug of coffee. He then proceeds to fill it for a second time and then fills another mug, the one that belongs to Dean and has Darth Vader on it.

“Here, Dean,” Castiel says, handing Dean his mug.

“Thanks, Cas,” Dean says, pecking his lips before taking a sip. He smiles at the taste. “You’ve gotta tell me how the hell you make it, Cas. What’s your secret when it comes to making coffee?”

Castiel makes a timid smile. “If I told you, you wouldn’t need me anymore.”

Dean stops mixing the batter and he leaves the bowl on the counter before walking to Cas and getting his hands on his hips. “You know I’m always gonna need you, Cas, right?”

Castiel smiles, beautifully. “I know. But I meant in the kitchen.”

Dean chuckles. “Just wanted to make sure you knew that.”

Castiel leans and kisses him, sweetly and tenderly, making Dean’s toes curl. “I know, Dean.” He gets his hand on Dean’s face and his thumb caresses his freckled cheek. “And I’m always going to need you.”

Dean leans into the touch. “Yeah, I know.” He kisses him one more time and then he pulls away in order to keep making breakfast.

While Dean makes the pancakes, Cas prepares some fruit, because he always has to have something healthy for breakfast, and Dean too, although he doesn’t say it out loud. By the time Dean has made two pancakes, Sam comes into the kitchen.

“The smell of pancakes woke you up?” Dean asks with a teasing voice.

Sam chuckles. “Good morning to you too, Dean.”

“Good morning, Sam,” Castiel says, smiling.

“Good morning Cas.”

“Here’s your coffee,” Castiel offers, giving Sam his moose mug. It was one gift Dean found hilarious. Sam didn’t like it, but he still uses it every morning.

“Thanks a lot, Cas.”

“I smell pancakes!” Charlie exclaims as she enters into the kitchen. “Isn’t this the best smell to wake up?”

Dean makes an agreement pout. “Yeah, but I prefer the smell of morning sex with my husband.”

“Dean!” Sam and Charlie exclaim.

Dean laughs and looks at Cas, who is shaking his head. “You are terrible, honey,” Castiel says. “Here’s your coffee, Charlie.”

“Thank you so much, Cas,” she says with a thankful smile. “Cas is nicer,” she says to Dean, giving him an accusative look. “And it’s morning, which means that it’s his worst time of the day.”

“It depends on the day,” Dean says, casually and Castiel nods in agreement. “Especially if I wake him up with by sucking his cock.”

“Stop it!” Sam and Charlie say at unison.

“C’mon guys, what we and Cas do and have is something so beautiful!” He gives them a smirk and then he looks at Cas, who has that look that means _I’m married to an assbutt_.

“Regardless of that, we don’t need details!” Sam protests, glaring his brother. “I don’t tell you any details about my sex life!”

“That’s because you have none.” His words earn him Sam’s brand own bitch face. “And don’t forget that time you overshared your time with Ruby.”

Sam rolls his eyes. “You wanted details.”

“Not of that kind of details and you knew it.” He now proceeds to fry the eggs. He tends to make six. Two for Sam, one for Charlie and three for Dean and Castiel, because they share half of one because two fried eggs are too much and one too little. “Consider it my revenge.”

“Brothers. Right, Cas?” Charlie says, grinning.

“Winchester brothers,” Castiel shakes, shaking his head.

Dean rolls his eyes at him and shows the spatula to him, attempting to look threatening. “I want to divorce you.”

Castiel smiles. “You are so susceptible, honey.”

Dean arches his eyebrow. “Look who’s talking. You wanted to divorce me because I was critical of your lazy ass.”

“You two are too dramatic,” Sam intervenes.

“Shut up, Sam,” Dean and Castiel say at the same time. That makes Charlie burst into an uncontrollable laughter that soon spreads to the three men. They laugh so hard that Dean almost burns the eggs he is frying, which causes the other three to laugh even more.

He loves having moments like this.

 

_____

 

Dean walks towards the greenhouse, carrying two bottles in his hand. When he enters it, he recognizes the music Cas is playing in there. It’s one of the tapes Dean gifted him, the one with his top 13 Led Zeppelin songs. Cas likes listening to those tapes when he is working on the greenhouse.

“Hey, Cas,” Dean says as he walks towards Cas, who is kneeling and recollecting some red peppers.

Castiel turns his face and looks at Dean, smiling. “Hello, Dean,” he says. Dean hands him one of the bottles and he stands up. “Thank you.” He takes a long sip and sighs happily.

“Sam found us a case,” Dean says after taking a sip as well. Castiel arches his eyebrow, being curious. “His exact words were: you and Cas are gonna deal with this hunt because you have tainted my head and Charlie’s with your damn sex life, so go on this hunt and have sex like bunnies in a motel room.”

“Have sex like bunnies in a motel room?” Castiel asks, frowning. “Since when do rabbits have sex in any kind of place built by humans?”

Dean rolls his eyes. “Fucking like bunnies means fucking too many times in a day, Cas.”

“Oh, I didn’t know.”

“Always so literal.” His words earn him a glare. “It’s in Whitefish, Montana. It’s almost a twenty hour drive, so how about we go after lunch?”

“What’s the case about?”

“They found a dead woman without any blood on her body.”

“Vampire.”

“Sounds like it, but,” he picks his phone and shows Cas a photo of the neck of the woman, with some bite marks that are different than regular vampires leave after they feed on their victims. Castiel grabs the phone and studies Dean’s face. “The marks on her neck don’t belong to any vampire’s marks I’ve ever seen.”

Castiel hands him the phone. “Could it be some different breed of vampires?”

Dean shrugs and pouts. “Could be. I’m not sure. Wanna go and check it with me?”

Castiel arches his eyebrow and smirks. “Sam’s not coming at all?”

“Nope. He says this is our punishment for talking about our sex life.”

“But I didn’t talk about it at all.”

Dean makes a sly smile. “Yeah, but given that we’re married…” He gets his arms on Cas’ hips, not missing the roll of his blue eyes. “But don’t worry, while we’re gone, those fuckers aren’t gonna have my delicious food and your amazing coffee, so they are kind of punishing themselves.”

Castiel makes an impressed face. “I hadn’t thought about that.” He leans a pecks Dean’s lips. “Okay, help me with recollecting the peppers and then we eat and hit the road.”

“Alright, babe.”

 

_____

 

“I brought this tape,” Castiel says as he shows Dean said tape.

Dean grins when he sees that Cas brought the Led Zeppelin tape he was listening a few hours ago in the greenhouse. “You really love this one, don’t you?” Dean asks, feeling something heartwarming blooming of his chest. He moves his hand from the wheel of the Impala and gets the tape in the cassette player.

“It was the first gift I ever got,” Castiel answers casually. “It means a lot to me.”

Dean smiles and blushes. “I just wanted to give you something that reminded you of home, y’know? That while you were away, you’d remember us, you’d remember me.” He keeps looking at the road, feeling a bit embarrassed. “I also thought that maybe you’d know what giving you a mixtape meant.”

“I had some knowledge about the meaning of the gesture, but I wasn’t sure if you truly meant it. Back then, part of us knew we felt something for each other but always discarded that thought, thinking we weren’t good enough for each other. But deep down, we knew we were in love with each other.”

“Yeah.” He knew it for a long time, but he didn’t want to hope. Cas was an angel of the lord and Dean was just a human. At that time, Dean was sure that somebody like Cas couldn’t love someone like Dean.

“I was kind of confused and shocked when I heard some of the lyrics of these songs,” Castiel adds, turning his face to look at Dean. “There were many sexual innuendos and I got most of them. Years later I learnt that Led Zeppelin is considered cock rock, but when I first listened to it, I was extremely confused.”

Dean chuckles and rubs the back of his neck. He steals a quick look at Cas. “I was trying to be subtle. I’m not good at that.”

Castiel chuckles, too. “I don’t think that a song that says _squeeze my lemon 'til the juice runs down my leg, squeeze it so hard, I'll fall right out of bed_ is being subtle, Dean.” He gives Dean one of his sassiest looks and makes a rogue smile. Dean knows his face is red as a tomato and that Cas finds it amusing. “I remember hearing that song for the first time and I squinted at the radio, wondering why anybody would want to squeeze a lemon and what that had to do with falling onto the bed.”

Dean gives him an incredulous look and smiles. “Did you seriously think that at first?”

Castiel hums in agreement. “But when Robert Plant then says _I wonder if you know what I'm talkin' about_ , I got the real meaning, and then I thought, why did Dean put this song in here?”

Dean bites his lower lip as he smiles. “You complain about me when it comes to being subtle, but you suck when it comes to getting hints.”

“So you were trying to tell me that you wanted me to squeeze your lemon?” He gives him a not so innocent look and Dean glares him. “Don’t give me that look, Dean. I didn’t give you a mixtape full of songs about wanting to have sex with someone.”

“I’m hating you so fucking much right now.”

Castiel chuckles. “You are so cute when you get frustrated.”

Dean huffs, ignoring how his cheeks get flushed once again. “You could’ve asked me why I put that song and the others, y’know?”

“Would you have given me an honest answer?”

Dean sighs. “I don’t know. Probably not.” He shrugs and keeps looking at the road. “When I gave you the mixtape I hoped that the gesture would tell you that I was in love with you and the songs in it would put the words to what I felt. But at the same time I didn’t want to, because I wasn’t sure if you felt that way.” He looks at Cas and sees that understanding look on his face that always makes Dean feel better. “I didn’t know how it was gonna turn out but at least I thought, hey, Cas at least has something that reminds him of me.”

“That’s why I always like listening to it,” Castiel confesses. “It’s you, in every song.”

Dean smiles. “Always turning everything into a cheesy thing…”

“Always being so defensive about it…”

Dean dedicates him a beautiful grin. After a small silence, he says, “So, you think about my lemon and about squeezing it too while you listen to it?”

“No, I think about your brother’s lemon,” Castiel deadpans with a straight face.

Dean makes a grossed face. “For fuck’s sake, Cas, don’t make me think about that.”

“Then don’t ask stupid questions. Your lemon is the only lemon I love.”

“This conversation is starting to be surreal,” Dean says, chuckling.

“I think what makes this surreal is the fact that Robert Plant associated the human penis with a lemon,” Castiel explains, using a serious voice and Dean can’t believe that Cas finds such subject something worth of discussion, but that’s one of the things that makes Cas who he is. “I would understand it if he used that metaphor for testicles, given they have a similar shape, but the human penis doesn’t hold any resemblance with any type of lemon.”

“Are you actually discussing this?” Dean asks, a bit surprised, and Castiel gives him his brand own confused look; tilt of head, frown and squinty eyes. So they are definitely doing this. Dean sighs. “I don’t know, Cas. Maybe using banana instead of lemon screwed up the rhythm of the song. But bananas don’t have juice, so you can’t squeeze them until the juice comes out. If you squeeze a banana, you just smash it and it becomes some gross sort of puree, so I don’t think anyone wants that.”

Castiel makes a thoughtful face. “That’s true. Then, maybe he should have used cucumber or zucchini, given that they are harder, but once again, they don’t produce any kind of juice.”

“Squeeze my cucumber ‘til the juice runs down my leg sounds terrible,” he says between laughter. “You would be a terrible songwriter.”

“At least I would use better metaphors.”

Dean laughs. “I can’t believe I’m discussing Led Zeppelin lyrics with you. It’s awesome.”

“Didn’t you find it surreal?”

“Yeah, but it’s awesome, too.” He smiles again. “You’re awesome.”

Castiel blushes and smiles, timidly. “Thank you, Dean.”

 

_____

 

“Let me drive,” Castiel says with a concerned voice.

“Only if you promise me not to crash her against anything,” Dean says with a warning voice.

“I know how to drive, Dean.”

Dean nods and stops on the shoulder of the road. He gets out of the Impala while Cas slides onto the front seat until he is in the driver’s seat. Dean goes around the car and gets in the Impala again, sitting on the passenger’s seat. “Thanks,” Dean says, rubbing his eyes. He is getting older and he can’t drive for as long as he used to.

“No problem, beloved.” Castiel gets the Impala back in the road and keeps driving. He has driven the Impala a couple of times, and he is a good driver, but Dean is always worried about his baby when he isn’t the one driving it. “I think we should stop by the next town and get a motel room; we both need a good rest.”

Dean hums. “Yeah, we should.” He rubs his tired eyes again. “We still have a long way to go and then we’re gonna have to interview people and go to the morgue, so yeah, we could use some rest. And also some food.” He turns his face to stare at Cas; there’s something comforting about watching him drive. “You look good behind the wheel of the Impala.”

Castiel looks at him, surprised. “Really?”

“Yeah.” He smiles. “You should leave your initials in her, y’know? Next to mines and Sammy’s. You’re part of this car as much as me and Sammy.” He smiles and he treasures the beautiful smile his husband makes after hearing his words.

“I would love that.”

They keep driving for about two hours, until they reach a town and decide to stop by to have some dinner and then to get some sleep. The motel doesn’t have the most comfortable bed, but Dean has slept in worst places. Besides, having Cas in the same bed as him always makes the bed better, without mattering the quality of the mattress.

They fall asleep, feeling sore from the drive and wake up quite rested. After showering in the tiny bathroom and getting some breakfast, they keep on their way to Whitefish, making it to the town by lunch time. They have a quick sandwich and put on their fed suits before going to the police to ask about the victim. As they talk to the sheriff, both Dean and Castiel interchange some knowing looks. The sheriff is quite cheerful but at the same time seems that he doesn’t trust them. Any other person wouldn’t notice, but the two of them have dealt with too many different sheriffs while hunting to know when their behavior is something they should be suspicious about.

“Please, tell me you found him creepy,” Dean says to Castiel once they are back in the Impala.

“I think I would describe him as disturbing,” Castiel confessed. “There is something about him that I don’t really like.”

Dean starts the car and begins driving to the morgue. “Do you think he might be a vampire?”

“He might.” He leans a bit down onto the seat. “Having a vampire as the sheriff could come in handy whenever a corpse with suspicious marks on the neck appeared.”

Dean hums in agreement.

It didn’t take them too long to get into the morgue. The mortician isn’t as creepy or disturbing as the sheriff. She makes her job and answers the questions Dean and Castiel make her without being suspicious or defensive. She even tells them that this isn’t the first time she has seen someone with those exact marks.

“These marks are confusing,” Dean says after the mortician has left them alone. “They don’t look exactly like a vampire, but they don’t look like any other monster I know.”

“I guess we should research the lore about different vampires,” Castiel says, sighing. “I can’t recall seeing this type of bite before.”

The mortician comes back and both Dean and Castiel look at her. “Here, agent Hale,” she says as she hands Dean a file. Castiel approaches him and looks at it. “This is the file of the other victim we found with the same wound.”

Dean reads the file. It is basically like reading the file of the woman that had died three days ago. The only thing that changed was the place where both victims were found. Tina Welsh had died near to the school she worked on, while Matthew Sein had died close to a bar.

“Well, thanks for everything,” Dean begins to say as he closes the file. “If you find something unusual, don’t doubt to give us a call.”

“Sure,” she says.

Dean and Castiel leave the morgue and then begin to interrogate the family of Tina. No one of them gives them anything useful. Tina seemed to be a loved teacher with a nice life. Her family is devastated and Dean can understand their pain.

By the time they make it back to the motel, both of them grab their laptops and begin to research. Castiel looks in the lore for different kind of vampires while Dean tries to hack into the police department records.

“The other victim had died about six months ago, right?” Castiel suddenly asks.

Dean nods. “Yeah, why?”

“It’s a long period of time between one death and the other. Usually nests of vampires kill a person once a month at least.”

Dean makes a thoughtful grimace. “So, you think we’re dealing with just one vampire?” he asks, and Castiel nods. “Could be, but usually vampires have nests, they hate being on their own.”

“Yes, they do, but everything points to another breed of vampires, so maybe they are different about that too.”

“Yeah, may— son of a bitch!” Dean says when he looks at the screen.

“What’s wrong?” Castiel asks, standing up from his chair and placing behind Dean so he can see the screen.

Dean points at the screen. “Somebody deleted all the records that contain the word ‘marks’ or ‘neck’, and it was quite recently.” He taps the screen showing to Cas that the data was deleted not so long after they left the police station.

“That can’t be a coincidence.”

“You think?” He gives him a sassy look and Castiel glares him. “My bet’s on the sheriff.”

“There were cameras on that building in front of the school,” Castiel says. “Can you hack them? Maybe we can get a picture of the vampire.”

“I’ve already searched them in the police department, but they were deleted, too. So I’m gonna have to hack the security company and that’s gonna take some time, because they use strong passwords. Thankfully, I’m gonna use that program Charlie showed me and run it. It might take several hours.”

“Meanwhile, we should keep looking for the type of vampire we are looking for.” He begins to walk away, back to his seat, but Dean grabs his wrist.

“How about we go to some nice Italian restaurant I saw on our way to the police department?” Dean asks with hopeful eyes. “This is gonna take a lot of time, and until we don’t get an image of the vampire, we’re kind of in the dark, so, let’s have dinner.”

“We are in the middle of a case, Dean.”

“C’mon, Cas.” Dean draws him closer and makes puppy eyes. “We need to eat, and the computer’s gonna keep working while we’re gone.”

Castiel gives him a soft smile and sighs. “Okay, Dean.”

They change their suits for their regular clothes and they drive towards the restaurant. It is a nice and cozy Italian restaurant, nothing too fancy, so Dean doesn’t find himself feeling out of place or uncomfortable.

Food turns out to be delicious, and the desserts are even better. Cas even tells him to try to make those desserts at home. He always says that when they eat something delicious in a restaurant. Dean always cooks whatever Cas tells him to try making at home, and usually, Dean nails the dishes.

The bill ends up being cheaper than Dean expected for such a great meal. Before they leave town, they must come back to this restaurant one more time.

They drive back to the hotel, and the moment Castiel closes the door behind him, Dean kisses him and presses him against the door, getting his hands on his husband’s hips and on his nape, pressing their bodies closer. Castiel moans, surprised and delighted and sneaks his hand under Dean’s t-shirt while the other remains on his nape, his fingers brushing his hair.

Dean begins to kiss Cas’ jaw and neck, not leaving hickeys even if he wants to. They still have to work and pretend to be FBI agents, so he should better leave hickeys in places where Cas can cover them with clothes.

“I thought we were going to do research,” Castiel says with a raggedy voice. He rolls his hips, desperate for the friction and Dean smirks.

“I can stop if you want me to,” Dean suggests, pulling away and giving Cas a teasing look.

“Shut up and kiss me, Dean.” He pulls him into a kiss, almost smashing Dean against his body.

Dean groans, pleased and gets his leg in between Castiel’s legs, his knee brushing his cock, and the ex-angel moans into the kiss before he pushes Dean away a few steps and walks towards him, looking at him with hungry eyes. Dean smirks and catches Castiel’s arm and draws him closer, making the two of them chuckle before kissing again.

They take off their boots and socks without breaking the kiss and then they begin to take off each other’s clothes.

“You wear too many layers,” Castiel complains after taking off Dean’s black denim jacket, his read plaid shirt and his t-shirt.

“It’s fucking fall, Cas,” Dean mutters as he takes off Castiel’s t-shirt. “Are you expecting me to go around naked or what?”

“You wear the same amount of layers regardless of the time of the year.”

“You’re an exa— oh, fuck,” Dean moans when Castiel starts to kiss and lick his left nipple. “Cas—” He closes his eyes and tilts his head up, burying his fingers in Cas’ dark hair as the ex-angel works his mouth and tongue on his nipple while his thumb caresses the other.

Dean gasps when Castiel begins to nibble one and pinch the other. His legs tremble and Dean doesn’t know how he is standing at all. Castiel pulls away and cups Dean’s face before kissing him, swirling their tongues. Dean traces down Castiel’s tattooed back, until his hands reach his ass and he gets them under his boxers, giving his tight ass a squeeze that earns him a soft moan. His fingers go a little bit downer and he teases Cas’ hole, which makes Castiel pull away from the kiss to let out a loud moan.

Castiel quickly gets his hands on Dean’s jeans and starts taking them off with steady and eager hands, and Dean does the same with Castiel’s. Their underwear meets the floor next and the two of them keep kissing as they make it to the bed. Dean twirls them around before they drop onto the mattress, being Cas the one with his back on it.

Dean begins to map Castiel’s amazing body with his hands as he deepens the kiss. Castiel does the same, wanting to touch every part of Dean’s body. They roll their hips together, feeling their hard cocks and the amazing friction that comes with it.

Dean pulls his mouth away from Cas and looks at him with a big grin drawn on his lips as he stares at his husband, flushed and breathing hard. He places his mouth behind his ear, kissing that sensitive spot that makes Castiel moan and arch his back. He even nails Dean’s scalp as he says his name. He would never get tired of hearing how Cas says his name when they are like this.

He traces down Cas’ body with his mouth, leaving a trail of kisses while his thumbs circle his nipples, hardening them under his persistent touch, making Cas moan louder and making his body restless. When he reaches his cock, Dean wraps his lips and swallows him in one bob, without taking his eyes of him.

“Fuck, Dean—” Castiel moans, immediately getting his hands on Dean’s hair, gripping it tightly but without hurting him.

Dean hollows his cheeks and tightens his lips before he moves his head again. He has a weakness for sucking Cas’ cock and feeling it in his mouth and on his tongue. He loves the feeling and how much his husband enjoys it and the rapt faces he makes. He looks at him through his eyelashes, watching his parted lips and his closed eyes and Dean’s cock twitches.

He keeps blowing him, bobbing his head up and down a couple of times, until Castiel pulls him away and Dean smirks, well aware of why Cas is stopping him in the middle of a stellar blowjob.

“Fuck me, Dean,” Castiel simply says, his words sounding affected by his hard breathing.

“Love it when you talk dirty to me,” Dean says with a wide smirk. He licks Cas’ length one more time, loving the groan Cas makes and then he kisses him, dirtily, being Cas the one who deepens it. “Let me grab the lube and the condom,” he whispers, trying to catch his breath after the breathtaking kiss.

Castiel nods and watches how Dean gets up from bed and grabs the duffel bag that is under the bed. He finds the lube and the condom easily and doesn’t bother putting it back under the bed; that can wait.

He kisses Cas again before putting on the condom and spreading the lube on his cock and on his fingers. Castiel spreads his legs and Dean smiles at that sight. He leans onto the ex-angel and kisses him while he gets one finger inside him, adding one by one slowly, loosening Cas and stretching him until he has four fingers inside him.

His fingers touch Castiel’s prostate a couple of times, making Castiel moan loudly, before he finally pulls them away, wiping them on the sheet. He gets his hands on Cas’ thighs tenderly caressing the skin before Castiel gets his legs around Dean’s hips and pulls him down to meet him in a sweet kiss.

Dean aligns himself and starts pushing inside Cas, both of them closing their eyes and holding their breath as Dean slides inside him. It doesn’t matter if they have done this countless of times; it always feels awesome.

When Dean is fully inside Castiel, they both let out the breath they were holding and they kiss, sweetly, while Castiel adjusts around Dean. The ex-angel caresses Dean’s face and Dean leans into the touch, making happy, little moans into it.

Dean wastes no more time and he starts to rolls his hips, finding a rhythm with Cas quite easily, and both of them pull away from the kiss and start moaning each other’s names. Dean rests his forehead on Cas’, making them feel each other’s raggedy breathings. He closes his eyes for a long moment, focusing on the feeling of Cas around him, of his hands touching his freckled body and of the ghost of his breath on his face.

Castiel kisses him and pulls him downer, until there isn’t any space left in between their chests. He rolls his hips a bit harder, matching Dean’s thrusts that become a bit more eager. He changes the angle, just slightly, but it is perfect, before he can aim for Cas’ prostate and that makes Castiel moan and tremble under his body, clenching so tightly around Dean that Dean can’t stop his moans.

“Fuck, Cas, Cas, Cas, fuck, so fucking good, Cas, oh, Cas,” Dean moans as he thrusts into Castiel again, touching that wonderful spot.

“Dean, Dean, Dean, Dean—” Castiel digs his nails on Dean’s back as Dean’s cock touches his sweet spot, tilting his head up and making Dean seize that moment to kiss his throat. He would love to suck his salty neck, but they are still working on the case.

Dean feels the heat burning in his stomach, and he can feel how Cas’ cock is twitching. Both of them are really close, so Dean increases the speed of his thrusts and aims for Cas’ sweet spot over and over again. Castiel comes while he moans Dean’s name, painting both bellies with his release and clenching extremely tightly around Dean that Dean comes immediately, moaning his husband’s name.

They keep moving until they are done with their releases and Dean collapses onto Cas, burying his face in the crook of Cas’ tanned neck, panting loudly but smiling, sated and happy. He feels how Cas slides his legs from his body, stretching them on the bed and holding Dean tightly before letting out a happy sigh.

Neither of them moves for a while, still enjoying the afterglow. Dean eventually moves his face away and smiles before kissing Castiel, who smiles, too. When they pull away, they grin at each other.

“That was a really nice orgasm,” Castiel says.

Dean arches his eyebrow. “Are you saying that your previous orgasms weren’t nice?”

Castiel rolls his eyes. “And yet you complain about my tendency about taking things too literal.”

“I was just teasing you, you dumbass.” He kisses his nose. He starts to pull away, both of them hating the loss of each other. “I know that every orgasm you have with me is fucking awesome.” He takes off the condom and knots it.

“Yes. Every orgasm I have had with you feels fucking awesome.”

Dean grins and looks at Castiel before he throws the condom to the trash bin. It doesn’t end up in it, but Dean doesn’t care. He will pick it up tomorrow. He grabs the duffel bag and looks for some wipes to clean Cas’ mess on both of their stomachs. “I didn’t squeeze your lemon ‘til your juice fell down your leg, but I was close,” Dean teases as he cleans Cas.

Castiel chuckles. “You are an assbutt, Dean.”

“I’m your assbutt, don’t forget it.”

Castiel gets his hand on Dean’s cheek and Dean immediately leans on the soft touch. “Never, beloved.”

Dean smiles. “So fucking cheesy.”

“You started.” He grabs the cloth and Dean lies onto the bed, next to Cas, who rolls onto his side and begins cleaning Dean, as delicately as usual. “Besides, I know you love it when I call you beloved.” He throws the wipe away, and he gets it in the bin.

“C’mere,” Dean says, feeling his cheeks blushing. He opens his arms and Castiel snuggles against his side, getting his arm onto Dean’s chest while Dean holds him tightly, pressing him even closer. Making love with Cas always feels awesome, and so does cuddling with him after it. He kisses the top of his head and sighs happily. “Love this. Love you,” he mumbles into his hairline.

Castiel smiles and Dean feels it on his skin. He kisses his collarbone and then nuzzles it. “I love you too, Dean.”

They cuddle for a long time, until both of them fall asleep, still holding each other. Dean always had trouble at falling asleep, but since he is with Cas, sleep comes easy to him. He sometimes gets nightmares, and so does Castiel, but those aren’t as usual as they used to. Sleeping in the same bed helps them.

Suddenly, there’s a beeping sound that wakes the two of them. Dean doesn’t know at first where the sound comes from, but he knows he is familiar with it. He looks at the alarm clock next to the bedside table and sees that it is 3 A.M.

“What’s that sound?” Castiel mumbles, a bit pissed off.

“The laptop,” Dean answers as he sits on the bed, which makes Castiel grunt. He rubs his face and switches on the light, making Cas grunt again and bury his face in the pillow. “That’s the alarm the program makes when it has finally hacked something.” He stands up and walks towards the table, where his laptop is.

“Are you going to see that now?” His words are muffled by the pillow but Dean understands him perfectly.

“Yeah,” he says, grabbing the laptop and going back to the bed where he sits.

“Dean, this can wait until the sun comes up.” He blindly tries to close the laptop, but Dean stops him and looks for the video of the day Tina was murdered and plays it, pressing fast forward. Castiel rolls until his face is no longer pressed against the pillow and he opens one eye and looks at the screen.

“This is the victim,” Dean says when he recognizes her. He presses the play button, putting it into a normal speed.

Castiel finally sits on the bed too, pressing his shoulder against Dean’s. “Yes, she is.”

Suddenly, in the image, a German shepherd appears, following her, and in a matter of seconds, the dog transforms into a human. “What the fuck?!” Surprisingly, the man isn’t the sheriff, but instead looks like a man near his sixties. He grabs Tina and bites her neck and his eyes shine in a strange weird that distort the footage of the camera. He drinks her blood until she falls onto the floor and he disappears. “What the fucking fuck is that?” He looks at Cas with a shocked face, but Cas is looking at the screen with a calculative look.

Castiel grabs the laptop and he clicks on the internet browser icon. “I know I have read about this monster today,” he says as he writes some key words. “Got it. It’s the Strigoi, a vampire from the Romanian mythology. He can become invisible and transform into the shape of any animal. They are the troubled spirits of the dead rising from the grave “

“Holy fuck.” Dean reads the page where Castiel is. “Well, at least fire will kill him, so that’s good news.” He doesn’t like that they are going to have to hunt a monster than can become any type of animal and disappear, because that will complicate things. “Now we just gonna have to find this guy. But the camera doesn’t show his face quite good, so I can’t find him on the internet or police records.”

Castiel makes a thoughtful grimace. “The Strigoi doesn’t look like anyone in the police station, so why would anyone have deleted all the files regarding this case?”

Dean looks at him. “Maybe the Strigoi has threatened them. We should talk to the sheriff.” He knows that Cas is going to ask him is they are going to do it tomorrow, so he just smiles as says, “Yeah, we’ll go tomorrow. We need to get some rest and the sheriff won’t be in the station until a few hours.”

“Wise decision, Dean,” Castiel says as he hands Dean the laptop.

Dean chuckles and switches off the laptop, leaving it back on the table before turning off the lights and getting back in bed with Cas, holding each other the way they were before the laptop woke them up.

 

_____

 

“Here’s your coffee,” Dean says as he hands Castiel a big cup of coffee he bought in the Starbucks in front of their motel room.

Castiel sits on the bed. He is still sleepy but he manages to smile and grab the cup. “This is one of the reasons I love being married to you.”

Dean huffs. “Because I’m your caffeine deliverer?” He arches his eyebrow and looks at Cas, who answers the question with a hum. “You’re such a romantic, babe.”

Castiel ignores him and snatches from Dean’s hand the paper bag with cookies and muffins. He grabs the blueberry muffin and before he takes a bite, he offers it to Dean, who shakes his head; he’s more of a chocolate muffin guy. “I’ve been thinking that maybe the reason why the sheriff looked so disturbing was that he might have tried to hide Tina’s body but we arrived before he could do anything.”

“Possibly,” Dean mutters around the white chocolate cookie. “I wonder if he’s gonna talk.” He swallows it and then drinks some more coffee. “Maybe he isn’t threatened; maybe he gets something from the Strigoi, like some kind of bribery, dunno.”

“It could be.” He nods and then takes a bit of his muffin. “You make better muffins.”

“You say that about every food that hasn’t been cooked by me.”

“Because it’s true.”

Dean smiles and blushes.

After they finish their breakfast, they shower together, get their federal suits on and drive to the police office, asking for the sheriff, whose face goes white the moment he spots them.

Dean is the one who manages to break him and the sheriff confesses that the Strigoi has links in every damn important force in town, keeping his existence as secret to the normal people. He has murdered the families of those who have been disobedient to him or of those who have fucked it up. They have tried to kill him, but it has been useless.

He confesses them where the Strigoi lives and Dean and Castiel leave the office and walk back to the Impala, going to the street where the Romanian vampire lives.

It is a big house, but it doesn’t stand out too much because all the houses in the street look as good as his. They don’t approach the house; they watch it from the distance, just in case, trying to spot him in the house, although it is still day and the Strigoi is not going to appear near the windows while there’s still sunlight.

“You seem worried,” Castiel says.

Dean sighs. “I have the feeling that the sheriff might’ve told the Strigoi that we’re after him.” He puts the binoculars on the seat, in the space left in between him and Castiel. “Just think about it. For him, the Strigoi is this fucking powerful monster that threatens his family, and we’re the fools that want to kill him. If I were him, I’d think we were gonna lose and I’d know that the Strigoi would found out I fucked up and kill my family.”

Castiel takes a deep breath. “That’s a reasonable and quite possible thought.”

“You’re not helping, Cas.”

Castiel ignores him and grabs the laptop. “The main problem when it comes to defeat him, it’s being aware that he can become invisible or turn into any kind of animal.” He searches for the Strigoi and starts reading out loud. “What I don’t understand is that he is supposed to rise from the grave, so why is he living in a house?”

“Because maybe when he isn’t sucking anyone’s neck, he likes watching TV? I dunno.” He starts the engine and Castiel gives him a curious look. “He’s not gonna appear anytime soon, you know that. We’ll be back once it gets dark and kill him with the flamethrower.”

“Okay.”

 

_____

 

Getting inside the house is the easiest thing. Dean has been getting into multiple properties since he was a little kid. The problem comes when they get inside and the moment they open the door to the basement, the Strigoi is waiting for them on the stairs and disappears. Castiel thought about buying some flour and bringing it with them to throw it at their invisible opponent to try to make out their figure, but before the can make that, the Strigoi throws himself at Castiel.

“Cas!” Dean yells, watching how Castiel ends up on the floor and a scratch appears on his cheek while he fights against the Strigoi, kicking him in the stomach. Before Dean throws the flour, he manages to hear a sound that belongs to a tiger. “Fuck,” he mutters before throwing the flour.

The flour ends up revealing part of the shape of the tiger, and Dean can tell it is huge. He could use the flamethrower, but he would burn Cas and that isn’t something he wants to do, so instead, he grabs his gun and shoots at the tiger, which roars and moves from Castiel to get Dean, but Castiel manages to grabs his tail and to keep him away from Dean.

“Dean! Now!” Castiel yells.

Dean starts the flamethrower but the Strigoi manages to get away from Castiel’s grip by transforming into what it seems like to be his natural shape, judging how the flour reveals a different form, and he punches Dean, who can’t see his opponent well, but he fights back, hurting his knuckles, but he manages to throw him out of his balance. He and Cas are about to fire him, but the Strigoi shapes into a bird and flies away, any rest of flour disappearing from him.

“You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me!” Dean exclaims.

“Dean,” Castiel says, approaching him. “Look.” He points at the blood falling from the Strigoi and Dean looks up, managing to see a tiny wound floating near the ceiling. “Shoot him and he will fall,” he murmurs.

Dean points his gun and the flying wound, trying to make out the shape of the bird. He aims and shoots, a new wound appearing and spitting more blood, making the bird fall down. Castiel immediately covers the Strigoi with flour, and he shapes from a bird to a human. The bullets don’t kill him, but they do weaken him.

Without wasting any more time, both Dean and Castiel fire him, hearing his awful sounds as he burns. Soon, ash appears and the flames disappear. Both of them sigh, relieved, and without saying a word, they look at each other and leave the house. The yells were loud, so it is probably that someone heard it and decided to call the police.

They run through the backyard, which is covered with tons of trees and makes them invisible to curious eyes. They get the flamethrowers inside a duffel bag they brought and then they climb the fence. Once they are in the quiet and dark street, they start walking, as if nothing was wrong.

They make it to the Impala and they drive to the motel. The moment they are in their room, Dean cups Castiel’s face and looks at the scratch on his cheek.

“It’s just a scratch,” Castiel says, casually

Dean feels his eyes getting glassy; seeing Cas with any kind of wound always makes his stomach twist. “Sit on the bed while I get some antiseptic and bandages.”

Castiel nods and does as he is told. Dean soon joins him and starts healing him. It’s not a deep scratch, but it needs to be cleaned and put some bandages to avoid any kind of infection. He heals him tenderly and carefully, not taking his eyes off the wound, aware of Cas’ beautiful blue eyes on him; he knows that Cas knows he is worried.

“I hate it when you get hurt,” Dean confesses when he is done. He looks at the patch covering Cas’ cheek and then he looks at his eyes. “I fucking hate it.”

“I hate it when you get hurt, too,” Castiel says, with a soft voice. He grabs Dean’s hands and looks at his knuckles, bloody from punching the Strigoi and he begins to clean the wound. “Bruised knuckles and a tiny scratch are insignificant compared to what the Strigoi could have done to us.” Castiel’s hands can be rough when he hunts, but when they touch Dean, they are gentle and loving.

“Yeah, I know, but still you got hurt.”

“It could have been worse if you didn’t shoot him.” He puts some bandage around his knuckles and then he kisses them, making Dean blush slightly. “We are still alive. That’s what matters.”

Dean cups his face and kisses him, slowly and tenderly. “We should get some rest, don’t you think?” he asks as he caresses Castiel’s hair, moving some lock of his hair.

Castiel smiles. “Of course.”

 

_____

 

“Wait,” Dean says when he sees Cas is about to open the door to get out of the Impala. After a long drive, they made it back to the bunker in one sitting, switching the driver, obviously. They should have stayed at a motel, but both of them wanted to go back home as soon as possible, so they drove and took some small naps when it wasn’t their time for driving.

“What?” Castiel asks, pulling his hand away.

Dean gets his switchblade from the glove box and hands it to Cas. “You’ve gotta put your name, remember?”

Castiel grins and he blushes. “Am I worthy of such thing?”

“Dude, don’t ask stupid questions. Of fucking course you are it.” He gives him an obvious look and Castiel’s cheeks get even redder. “Your initials should’ve been here for almost six years.” Now the ex-angel looks at him with a surprised, almost shocked face. “What?”

“You have been wanting me to put my initials in this car for six years? That’s longer than the time we’ve been together.”

“Yeah. But y’know, you were my best friend at that time and I already considered you part of the family. Of course I wanted to have your initials here.”

Castiel smiles and kisses Dean’s cheek. “You never cease to amaze me, Dean.”

Dean rolls his eyes but smiles. “Shut up.” He can feel his cheeks getting warmer. “What are you waiting for? Just do it.”

Castiel nods and he carves a C.W under the D.W and S.W, closer to the D.W. , and Dean grins when Cas finishes.

Both of them look at the new initials. “You should also mark the library table, too,” Dean remembers.

“Of course,” Castiel says and he puts the switchblade in his jean’s pocket. “Anywhere else?”

Dean knows Cas is teasing him, but Dean makes a thoughtful face and says, “We should find a place to put our initials too in the house of California, if that’s okay.”

“It’s more than okay, Dean.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so damn much for reading, for the kudos, the comments, the bookmarks and the subscriptions :')

Castiel knocks the open door of their bedroom and Dean looks up from his book. “Hey, Cas,” Dean greets with a bright smile. He folds the corner of the page he is, in case he has to close his book.

“Hello, Dean,” Castiel says as he steps into the room and sits next to Dean. “Me and Sam have found that there is going to be a free concert of classical music in Lebanon,” he begins to explain as he shows his mobile phone to Dean, where a website with the information of the event can be read. “I was wondering if you would like to join us. I know it isn’t your type of music, but maybe you are interested in coming along?”

Dean knows Cas so well, and he knows that even though Cas would understand that Dean wouldn’t want to go, he would like him to go. Cas does tons of things Dean likes because he likes them too or because he likes doing things that make Dean happy, even if they aren’t something Castiel truly likes.

He grabs the phone and looks at the repertoire and doesn’t know ninety percent of the pieces or the composers of said pieces. He isn’t a fan of classical music, but he enjoys some of the most famous ones, like _Toccata and Fugue in D minor_ by Bach, for example. He wouldn’t go alone, but given that he will go with Sam and Cas, given that Charlie is out because of work for this week, he knows he will at least have a great time with his husband and with his brother.

“Yeah, sure,” Dean says, handing Castiel back his phone.

“Really?” Castiel asks, really delighted and surprised.

“Yeah. It’s been a while since the three of us did something together. Let’s go to that classical concert.”

Castiel’s face melts, but still, there is some worry in his expression. “I know this type of music isn’t your thing, so I will understand if you don’t want to come, I don’t want to make you feel obligated to come if—”

Dean shushes him with a kiss and gets his hand on Castiel’s jaw, his thumb caressing his cheek, feeling his stubble. When he pulls away, the ex-angel has a puzzled look and Dean can’t help smiling. “Yeah, you dumbass, I wanna go. So, stop worrying about me not wanting to go. You know that if I didn’t wanna go, I would have said no directly.”

“I am aware of that, Dean,” he says as he grabs Dean’s hand and looks at his palm. Castiel’s thumb starts to move over it, caressing it, almost as if he was drawing patterns on it. Then, he looks up to Dean’s eyes, not stopping the motion. “But I also know that you come to places I want to go because you are such a great husband.”

Dean rolls his eyes and blushes. “I wanna go. I wanna spend some time out with you and Sammy.”

“Okay.” Castiel grins and he kisses Dean. “Thank you, Dean.”

“No problem, Cas.”

 

_____

 

“I can't believe Cas convinced you to come,” Sam says, grinning widely and way too smugly for Dean's liking. “Dean Winchester is coming to a classical music concert.”

“Why do you make me sound as if I were some uncultured bastard?”

“I didn't say that! You're one of the smartest people I know.” At his brother's praise, Dean can't help feeling a little bit embarrassed; Sam has always been the smart guy, not him. Dean knows he isn't an ignorant, but he doesn't have the same amount of knowledge as Sam does, even if both his brother and his husband have persistently pointed out Dean's intelligence. “But I will never find you listening to the stuff we're gonna listen to.”

Dean simply shrugs and takes a bite of his sandwich. The concert doesn't start in a bit more than an hour and it is going to last about an hour and a half, so it is better if he goes with his stomach full. “As long as we don't go to listen some rap shit or any of that kind of bullshit kids nowadays listen to, I'm fine.”

Sam chuckles.

Castiel gets into the kitchen and smiles at the two of them. “Still trying to make sure that he is coming?” Castiel asks to Sam as he makes his way to the cupboard to get his tea.

“I'm sure he's gonna get some holy water and throw it at me to see that I'm not possessed,” Dean mutters as he chews.

“You should do that if someday he decides to go running.”

“Yeah,” Sam says, arching both eyebrows.

Dean glares them. “I hate the two of you.”

Castiel kisses his cheek. “No, you don't.” He turns around and fills the kettle with water before putting it on the stove. “Are there any cookies left?”

“No,” Sam and Dean answer at the same time.

Castiel grunts. “Thanks for letting me none,” he sasses, glaring the two of them.

“I'll make more tomorrow,” Dean says as he wipes the crumbs from his mouth.

“Thank you.”

“But make a few more, please,” Sam says, casually.

Castiel chuckles while Dean rolls his eyes. “You two have a terrible sweet tooth.”

“Says the one who bakes a pie almost every week,” Castiel snaps, removing the kettle from the stove and pouring the hot water in his mug.

“Hey, you eat it too!”

“Of course I eat it.” He walks towards the kitchen table, carrying his mug with a bee pattern and sits down on the chair, next to Dean. “I don't want food to get spoiled.”

Sam presses his lips, trying to suppress his smile. Cas said it so casually that he almost makes his lame excuse seem believable.

“Yeah,” Dean says smugly. “And we shower together just to save water.”

Castiel hides his sly smile behind the mug as he takes a sip. “That's one of the perks of it.”

Dean grins and kicks Castiel’s foot. “Dick.”

“Assbutt.”

“You should learn new insults, Cas.”

“I know every insult in every language. If you wish me to, I can insult you in enochian.”

Dean huffs. “What a nerd.”

“Dean,” Castiel says with a sassy and challenging look. “You are wearing your Batman socks today; you are in no position to call me nerd.”

Sam snorts. “Really? Batman socks?”

“Yeah. Is there any problem?” He gives his brother a warning and a challenging look.

Sam smirks. “No. Not at all.” He makes a small pause. “Nerd.”

Dean rolls his eyes. “I’m the cool kind of nerd, at least.” He reclines on the chair and gives an exasperated look at his husband and at his brother. “Screw you.”

Castiel chuckles and then he kisses his cheeks. “You are so adorable when you pout.”

“I’m not pouting.”

“Yes, you are.”

“Whatever.” He huffs, loving the sweet smile Cas has on his face. “Finish your damn tea so we can get to the auditorium.”

“He’s such a bad loser,” Sam murmurs, amused, earning him a kick from Dean. “That just proved my point.”

“I feel so fucking attacked right now.”

Castiel stands up and caresses Dean’s nape on his way to the sink. “Let me grab my trench coat, beloved.”

Dean blushes, like he always does when Castiel calls him beloved. It’s been years since he started calling him that, but Dean still gets a warm and tingling sensation when Castiel says it. “Okay.”

Sam waits until Castiel leaves the kitchen to speak, “You still blush at that pet name.” There isn’t teasing or mockery in his voice, only amusement.

Dean smiles and looks at his hands, hoping that his blush will fade away. “Yeah.” He steaks a quick glance at his brother, noticing the curiosity in his eyes. “It makes me feel special.”

Sam smiles, honestly. “Sap.”

Dean rolls his eyes, but he smiles. “Yep.” He plays with his ring, feeling the chill of the white gold. “Sometimes I can’t believe he’s married to me, y’know? I know that he loves me so fucking much, but sometimes I look at him and think, holy shit, he actually loves me, how can he love me? I’m just a man and he was a celestial being that saw stars born and die. He could have almost everything with just snapping his fingers.” He sighs and then he smiles. “And yet, he chose me. It’s insane, but awesome at the same time.”

“He will always choose you, you know that.”

Dean smiles and nods. “Yeah.”

Castiel appears in the kitchen a few seconds after Dean’s words, wearing his trench coat and carrying Dean’s leather jacket. “I thought you might need it,” Castiel says as he approaches Dean.

Dean stands up and pecks Castiel’s lips before grabbing his leather jacket. “Thanks, Cas.” He puts it on and then he looks at Sam, who is also standing up. “Gotta grab your jacket?”

“Yeah, just get going to the garage, I’ll catch up.” Sam nods and leaves the kitchen, almost running.

Dean and Castiel leave the kitchen, too, walking in Sam’s opposite direction. “It’s still weird to see you wearing a trench coat without a suit and a tie,” Dean comments as they walk through the corridors.

Castiel frowns. “It’s been years since I last wore that outfit. Although I still wear it when we’re investigating a case.”

Dean shrugs. “Yeah, but it kind of was your look.” He looks at Cas’ clothes; he is wearing a grey sweater and some faded jeans that are about to get torn on his knees.

The ex-angel makes an acknowledgement hum but doesn’t say anything else. They walk in a comfortable silence for a while until Castiel speaks up again. “The scruff looks good on you. I like it.”

Dean grins and blushes. “Don’t get too used to it, though.” He likes having some scruff, but not too much. He didn’t shave because he didn’t look that bad, and he knows that Cas likes him with some scruff. Besides, he was feeling lazy and opted for not shaving for a couple of days.

“I know.” He smiles. “I like you either way.”

By the time they are on the stairs of the garage, Sam catches them up and the three of them walk to the Impala. Sam gets in the front seat. He and Cas have a deal; when they leave the bunker, Sam rides shotgun, when they drive back home, Cas rides shotgun. Dean is always the driver.

“Do you know where the auditory is?” Sam asks once they’re on the road.

Dean hums. “Yeah. I’ve driven pass that place a couple of times.” He drums the wheel briefly and looks up, at the cloudy sky. It seems it will rain in a few hours. The smell of the rain is intensifying little by little. “So, can you remind me who are the composers we’re gonna hear?”

“Rossini, Debussy, Sibelius, Liszt, Brahms and Dvorak,” Castiel answers, without taking his eyes from the window; he likes looking at the cloudy sky when it is about to rain. “I think you are probably going to enjoy Debussy the most.” He looks at the rearview mirror and Dean looks at his reflection, wondering why Castiel thinks he is going to like said composer. “I’m pretty sure you are going to enjoy the concert. Trust me.”

“Well, if I don’t, I’m getting us to a rock concert as a payback.”

“Can we go to a Green Day concert?” Castiel asks, leaning into the front seat to look at Dean. “I like their music. They have a wide range of different songs and their concerts seem to be fun.”

“Really? Green Day?”

Castiel frowns. “What’s wrong with Green Day?”

“Nothing. It’s not my favorite band, but I enjoy most of their songs. I’m just surprised that you like them and want to go to one of their concerts.”

“To be fair,” Sam intervenes. “You’re coming to a classical music concert, so anything’s possible.”

Dean makes an agreement pout. “Fair point.” He nods and still a glance at Cas. “We’ll check out about Green Day’s tour dates, if they’re on tour, when we’re home.”

“Of course.” He leans and kisses Dean’s cheek before he sits back on the backseat.

It doesn’t take them too long to reach Lebanon and find the auditorium; the worst thing is finding a parking spot. Dean finds one not so far from the building but it isn’t close either. They have to walk for a few minutes. Castiel immediately finds Dean’s hand and they intertwine their fingers, holding hands as they walk. Dean loves that.

The auditorium turns out to be bigger than Dean expected. The building misleads and lets everyone think that the auditorium is going to be small, but it’s actually pretty big. As Dean looks around, Sam and Castiel begin to walk towards the middle of it, to get their seats, because both of them say that’s the best place to hear the music. Dean follows them after a few seconds, and sits next to Cas, who is sitting in between the two Winchester brothers.

“This place is huge,” Dean murmurs as he takes off his leather jacket.

“Yeah, it looks smaller on the outside,” Sam agrees.

“Like the Tardis,” Castiel comments. He has also taken off his trench coat and is now putting his phone in silence mode, something that makes both Winchester brothers grab their phones to do the same.

“There's gonna be a pause in the middle of the concert,” Sam comments as he reads the program, showing it to Cas. Then, Sam chuckles, almost nostalgically. “The last time I went to a concert like this one was when I was in college.” He sighs, and Dean can tell he is remembering something about Jess; he has glassy eyes and Dean knows that's how his eyes get when he remembers her. It's been more than fifteen years, but Sam still misses her. Dean knows he would be the same if Cas passed away.

“Sam, are you alright?” Castiel asks, worried.

Sam smiles, appreciating the concern of his friend. He looks at Dean, and the older Winchester brother gives him a look, telling him with his eyes what he can't say with words, and Sam gets the comforting message. “Yeah, I'm good. Just remembering some stuff from the past.”

Castiel nods, aware of what that means. “I understand.”

“Sammy's quite a sentimentalist,” Dean jokes, knowing that's the best way to cheer up his brother. “And also a sap, even if I get all the reputation.”

Sam chuckles and shakes his head, but in his eyes there's appreciation. “Jerk.”

“Bitch.” He grins.

The lights turn off, except for the ones illuminating the stage. The musicians start to come out from each part of the stage and the audience claps their hands effusively. The musicians bow their heads and the director appears, also receiving a big applause. The moment the musicians sit on their chairs, the auditorium falls quiet.

The music begins to play. Dean doesn't recognize the piece, but it is a nice one. During the whole first part of the concert, Sam and Cas sometimes whisper something to each other, commenting the music. Dean doesn't say a word, letting himself enjoy the music. Cas asks him if he enjoyed the piece every time one finishes and the audience applauds, and Dean nods, making Castiel smile.

Surprisingly, the end of the first part arrives sooner than Dean expects, and the three of them comment which piece they enjoyed the best. Soon, the band comes back and the second part of the concert begins.

There's a piece that makes Dean quite emotional. He doesn't know why. Maybe because it reminds him of the kind of music that belongs to fantasy worlds, he isn't sure, but he feels tears forming in his eyes, and he gets his hand onto Cas', Cas turns his hand over, so their palms touch, and they hold hands. He looks at Dean briefly, and kisses his temple, and Dean lets out a breath and leans his head onto Castiel's shoulder.

“I told you that you were going to like Debussy,” Castiel whispers.

Dean smiles; Cas knows him so damn well.

 

_____

 

“I'm glad you enjoyed it,” Castiel says as they walk out of the auditorium.

“Yeah, it was nice,” Dean says, making a tiny smile. He looks at his phone and sees that it's almost supper time. “Hey, why don't we go somewhere and have dinner? It's been a while since we went out and ate.”

Sam huffs. “You don't feel like cooking?”

“I cook almost every fucking day of the year, I deserve a rest once in a while.”

Castiel smiles. “Yeah, we could go somewhere.”

Sam gets his phone and they step aside, leaving some space in the hall for people to come out. Most of them complain by the rain. “What kind of place do you guys wanna go?” He starts tapping something in his phone and looks at Dean and Castiel.

Dean smirks. “Something with fried things.”

Sam rolls his eyes and shakes his head. “Always with the healthiest choice.”

“Hey, I cook as healthy as possible back home. A man needs some dose of grease once in a while.”

“You should do more exercise, at least,” Sam advices, without taking his eyes from the phone screen.

Dean looks briefly at Cas, who gives him a look that means that he knows exactly the response he is going to give Sam and that no matter what, he won’t be able to prevent him from saying that. “I have sex with Cas. That counts as exercise.”

Sam moves his eyes from the screen to glare at Dean, who is smiling smugly. “Experts say that a good exercise should last at least thirty minutes. I doubt that any human can last that long during sex.”

“Dean can last that long if we take things slow,” Castiel says casually.

Dean can’t help laughing and blushing, not sure if he is feeling proud or a bit embarrassed. Maybe both. Sam closes his eyes and makes a grimace. “You two are perfect for each other.”

Castiel smiles, timidly, and steals a glance at Dean, who bites his lower lip as he smiles.

“There’s a bar not so far from here. We can walk there,” Sam explains, and then he looks at the entrance and sees that it is still raining. “Or run, if we don’t wanna get drenched.”

“You guide us, Sammy.”

They leave the auditorium and the three of them go to the bar Sam found on google, walking really fast. The rain isn’t too heavy, but it is cold and it drenches, and neither of them wants to end up getting sick. When they get inside the bar, the three of them are glad of the warmth of the place and how it quickly makes the coldness go away.

They sit on a booth and check the menu. Dean’s mouth waters at all the many fried goods. “Man, there’s so many good stuff.”

“We should be thankful we’re sat, because this is going to be the hardest choice of your life,” Sam says, sassily.

Dean shows him his middle finger. “Fuck you, Sammy.” He keeps reading the menu, trying to decide what to order. He would order everything if he was fifteen years younger, but unfortunately, that isn’t his case. “Did you decide?” he asks, looking at Cas.

“I’m going to order something you aren’t going to order so you can try it,” Castiel answers.

“I love being married to you.”

Castiel huffs. “I can’t believe you just love me because we can share food.”

“And you just love me because I bring you coffee when you can’t even get up from bed, so don’t judge me, babe.” He kicks his shin and Castiel rolls his eyes, but he smiles.

“Why don’t we get some of the combos?” Sam asks. “That way, you can eat a bit of everything.”

Dean makes a thoughtful face. “Yeah, but I also want some of the stuff that don’t go with the combo, like nachos and the bacon cheese fries.”

“And also an extra of mozzarella sticks,” Castiel says, giving Dean a knowing look, at which Dean responds with a grin.

“I’m gonna need three hours of running to get all of that out of my system,” Sam says, rubbing his eyes.

Dean smirks. “Well, you can start by going to the bar and ordering three beers, combo number one, mozzarella sticks, nachos and bacon cheese fries.”

Sam huffs and he stands up, smiling as he turns around. He stands out in between the rest of the people. He is always the tallest person in the room. The bar is crowded, but it’s still possible to walk.

Dean looks at Cas, sitting on his right. His hair is a complete mess and some locks of his hairs are curly because of the rain. The sleeves of his sweater are rolled up almost to his elbow, and Dean can see his arms perfectly and the tattoo with his name in enochian on Cas’ inner left wrist. He is all beefy, and the sweater marks the amazing shapes of his body. Cas has always had a strong body, but lately, his body is a bit stronger, a bit thicker and a bit beefier than before, and that’s something that Dean loves.

Dean gets his hand on Castiel’s nape and begins to caress him, making Castiel purr. “Dean,” Castiel simply says, like a soft moan.

“Fuck, you’re so hot, Cas.”

He gets his arm around Castiel’s neck and pulls him into a fervent kiss, getting his other hand on the inner of Castiel’s thigh, feeling the denim under his touch and how Castiel’s body reacts to his touch.

“Isn’t this considered exhibitionism?” Castiel asks, pulling away from Dean’s lips an inch, arching his eyebrow.

“Not unless we take off our clothes.” He plays with the hem on Castiel’s sweater, sneaking his fingers under Castiel’s t-shirt and touching his warm skin before they keep kissing.

Castiel immediately returns the kiss, getting his hand on Dean’s thigh, his fingers almost brushing his crotch, while his other hand roams Dean’s chest and neck, deepening the kiss as they both keep touching each other.

“I’ve been gone for less than five minutes and you’re already making out!” Sam exclaims, sounding more irritated than pissed. Both Dean and Castiel break their kiss but don’t take their hands from each other yet. “You two are worse than teenagers!” He sits down, next to Dean’s left side and glares the two of them as he hands them a beer.

Castiel pulls away and gives Sam an apologetic look while Dean gives Sam a cocky look. “Can’t I kiss my husband?”

Sam glares him. “Dude, you two weren’t just kissing.” He exhales sharply. “A few more minutes, and you two would have been undressing each other.”

“We don’t like having an audience, Sam,” Dean says, smirking. He pats Castiel’s leg and winks at him. “It’s Cas’ fault. He is so fucking hot and kissable.”

Castiel frowns. “I think you are making the situation worse, Dean.”

“You could be more supportive sometimes, you know?”

Castiel’s frown intensifies. “I’m always supportive.”

“I have to agree on that with him,” Sam says, earning him a glare from Dean. “Anyway,” Sam keeps saying, ignoring his brother’s look. “You go next to pick up all the food.” He gives Dean a round device with a number on it and Dean grabs it. It is the second time he sees that, and he knows it will vibrate and make a beeping sound when their food is ready.

“There was a time when you wanted me and Cas to be together and now you complain about it,” Dean snaps before he takes a sip of his cold beer.

“I don’t complain about you two being together. I complain about your making out sessions in front of me. Let’s not forget that time when I ran into you two in the library and saw things that I should only talk with a psychiatrist.”

Dean grins. “It’s something beautiful and natural, Sammy.”

Castiel nods, agreeing with Dean. “We weren’t doing anything any other human couple doesn’t do.”

“Both of you, shut up,” Sam implores.

Dean and Castiel laugh.

“I miss that simpler time when all you two did was staring at each other for an hour,” Sam mutters, smiling.

Dean chuckles and leans his head on Cas’ shoulder and looks up at Castiel’s beautiful blue eyes. “We still do that, right, Cas?”

Castiel looks back at him. “That’s right, Dean.”

“You just wanna mess up with me,” Sam protests, but there isn’t any malice in his voice. He is happy, even if he is a bit frustrated with the many shows of affection Dean and Castiel share in front of him.

“It’s funny,” Dean says, moving his face away from Cas and taking another sip. Sam gives him his brand own bitch face and kicks his brother’s shin. “And then you said that I’m a bad loser.”

“You two are bad losers,” Castiel intervenes.

“Shut up, Cas,” Sam and Dean say at the same time.

“You two just proved my point.”

The device starts beeping and vibrating and Dean smiles, eager to taste the food. “Yeah! Food time!” He almost jumps out of the seat and runs towards the bar. He can see Sam covering his face in embarrassment while Castiel simply shakes his face and smiles.

Dean manages to carry all the food by himself and puts it on the table, quickly getting back to his place on the booth, rubbing his hands in excitement and he stares at the delicious food, wondering what he should taste first. The mozzarella sticks win, even if he burns his tongue a bit with the melted cheese, but he doesn’t mind.

“Dean, you look as if you hadn’t eaten in a decade,” Sam mutters, side glaring his brother.

“Let a man enjoy some cholesterol,” Dean snaps, mouth full. He tastes the jalapeno bites and he moans. “So good.”

Castiel looks at Sam with that casual look of his. “And you were complaining about us making out later. I think this is worst.”

“How dare you?!”

Castiel grins, and it is so beautiful that Dean’s heart skips a beat. He will never get tired of being the reason of that beautiful smile.

“Right now, Cas is asking himself why he even married you,” Sam teases with a smirk as he gets some fries. He ends up creating a long string of cheese that goes from his hand to where the other fries are and he cuts it with his fingers.

Castiel shrugs and grabs some nachos. “He has always been an assbutt,” the ex-angel says casually. "I know what I was getting into when I accepted marrying him.”

“How did this conversation backfire at me?” Dean asks, surprised and sassy, adoring the smiles Cas and Sam make. “We were messing up with Sam, and somehow, now you two are making fun of me. How’s that we never make fun of Cas?” He looks at his husband, with a calculative look.

Castiel doesn’t look at Dean as he grabs some onion rings. “Because you end up frustrated by my tendency of taking things too literal or because I snap you with just one sentence.” He looks at him, as if he was explaining a math problem. “Not to mention that I am not as irascible as you are.”

“I want to divorce you.”

“Like I said; you are irascible.” He gives him a look that might look casual, but Dean knows it is a cocky one. Dean gives him a challenging look and Castiel makes a sly smile. “And while we are having this conversation, Sam is eating all the food.”

“Wait, what?” Dean asks, looking at his brother and then at the food, and Dean can’t help making a sassy look. “The rabbit food lover is now coming to the dark side of the food, huh?”

Sam blushes in embarrassment and Dean and Castiel burst into laughter, even Sam does too after a few seconds. Dean lives for moments like this.

 

_____

 

There are still clouds in the night sky, but there are clear parts that allow seeing the stars, shining brightly in between those dark clouds. Dean likes seeing the stars when he drives. He drives back home a bit slower than usually, respecting the speed limit. There is no hurry and he feels full, so he just wants to take things nice and slow.

Sam is in the backseat, taking a nap while his face is against the window. Castiel is in the passenger seat, looking out at the starry night. Dean wonders what Cas might be thinking. Not so long ago, Castiel could be among stars. Dean knows he must miss that. There aren’t too many things he misses about being an angel, but flying, healing and being among the stars are something Castiel still longs for; probably will long for the rest of his life.

Dean stretches his arm, until his fingers can brush Castiel’s nape and hair, making Castiel smile and purr at the touch. “C’mere,” Dean simply says.

Castiel doesn’t say anything and he gets closer to Dean, resting his head on his shoulder while Dean gets his arm around Castiel. Dean kisses the top of his head, keeping his eyes away from the road for a couple of seconds. The ex-angel then moves his right hand until he finds Dean’s and they intertwine their fingers. Castiel sighs, happily, and it makes Dean smile.

Castiel’s other hand rests on Dean’s thigh, close to his knee. “Did your knee hurt you today?” Castiel asks.

Dean’s left knee has started to hurt on some humid days. Things of getting older. “No, it didn’t. You know it only hurts when it’s fucking humid and it rains a lot.”

He hums. “Just checking.”

Dean sighs. “I guess that as I get older, it will hurt more and more, but that’s one of the downsides of getting older.” He tightens his grip on Cas’ hand and Castiel returns the squeeze. “Never thought I’d live long enough to actually get older.”

“Dean, you are only forty.”

“Yeah, but as a hunter, that means I’m almost eighty.” He looks at Cas with an obvious face and Castiel smiles. There is a small pause before Dean asks, “How you doing about the fact of getting older?”

“For now I’m doing good, all things considered.” He takes a deep breath. “But I have started noticing that I’m forgetting some stuff about my past. Not about myself, but just memories of things I did way before humans even began to exist.” He looks at the road while Dean gives him a concerned look. “I’ve read some of the files about the process of an angel’s grace becoming a human soul and it said that it is normal that an angel will forget some stuff once they become human, because the human brain can’t remember millions and millions of years.”

“When did you find out all of that?” Dean asks, feeling sad and frightened about Cas. He knows how awful it is to feel that you are forgetting things about your life. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I didn’t want to worry you.”

“Cas—”

Castiel moves his head from Dean’s shoulder. “I know I should have told you, but I—” He takes a deep breath and looks down. “I needed some time to process that.”

“You know I’d have given you all my support, right?”

Castiel smiles, honestly. “Yes, Dean, I know.” He squeezes Dean’s hand in a reassuring way. “Fortunately, I won’t forget everything. Given that I became human by turning my grace into a human soul, my memories won’t fade as badly as they would have if I had taken my grace. If I had taken my grace, most of my memories would have faded away by now, and I would have only kept the ones from the last century. But I’m still going to forget some things.”

“I’m sorry, Cas.”

Castiel shrugs, casually. “Downsides of becoming human.” He turns his face to look at Dean. “But I don’t regret it. I will never regret it.”

Dean lets out a shaky breath, feeling something tightening in his chest. He takes a deep breath, trying to calm himself. “But you’re still upset about forgetting things.”

“Yes, but it could be worse. It’s upsetting, but about ninety percent of the memories I want to preserve, are the ones I created once we met.”

Dean chuckles, bitterly. “You can’t be serious.”

Castiel frowns. “Why do you say so?”

“Cas, you’re tons of millions of years old, and I’ve only been in your life for a little over a decade. I’m just a minuscule part of your whole story.”

“That’s true, but you have been the biggest impact in my life, Dean.” He moves Dean’s hand and kisses the back of it. Suddenly, Dean feels tears forming in the back of his eyes. “I have important memories that I treasure from way before we met, and for now, those memories are intact. I think they will remain intact. I’m only forgetting battles and other angelic stuff, but nothing that I care too much. But I can assure you, that my favorite ones are the memories I created with you, Dean.”

Dean shakes his head and smiles. “You’re a sap.”

“I know. You like to point out that constantly.” His thumb caresses the side of Dean’s hand. “There are things that I will forget that won’t bother me and things that will, but forgetting things it’s something natural for humans.”

Dean exhales, sharply. “You gave up tons of things for me. How cou—?”

“Dean, I love you,” Castiel interrupts, certainty filling his voice. “We have had this conversation several times. You know the answer. I chose this, because this is what I wanted. And I don’t regret it.”

“Yeah, I know that, Cas. But—” He takes a deep breath and looks at Cas, seeing some hurt in his eyes. Dean knows how much Cas hates knowing that Dean thinks he doesn’t deserve him. “You gave up too much for me. And knowing that you’re also losing some of your memories, it’s just—” He doesn’t finish his sentence and instead clenches his jaw.

“You forget things, too. The only difference is that I have more memories than you given that I’m way older than you.” He looks at Dean, who doesn’t say anything and then, Castiel turns around on the seat, and cups Dean’s face. “Dean, I’m not forgetting important things, just some memories. It is upsetting because I’m not used to forget memories, but given the process I went through to become human, I won’t forget everything, just random things. So please, don’t blame yourself for it, because I know you are blaming yourself for it.”

Dean grimaces. “It’s kind of my fault.”

“No, it isn’t. It is my decision, and I knew what I was going to lose when I decided to become human.” He then kisses Dean’s cheek. “But I gained so much more because of that decision.”

Dean smiles. It is a small smile, but he somehow feels a bit better after those words. “Are you sure you aren’t saying that just to make me stop feeling guilty about this whole thing?”

“Dean, I’m happy, so happy. I have never been this happy before I met you. I am married to the man I love and he loves me as much as I love him. I have a family and a home. Trust me, giving up Heaven, was the best choice I made.” He smiles and kisses Dean’s cheek again. “You even sometimes say it too.”

Dean chuckles. “Yeah, I do.” He has told him that a couple of times.

Castiel goes back to the position they were before and he leans his head of Dean’s shoulder, and Dean quickly gets his arm back around Cas. “You are still going to worry, aren’t you?”

“I’m surprised you even have to ask.” He is going to worry about all of that, but if Cas says that it isn’t that bad, Dean will trust him. But he wishes he could keep some memories, because they are part of Cas, and losing that part of yourself can be terrifying. As he thinks that, something clicks in Dean’s mind. “You could write a journal,” Dean says, and sees how Cas’ curious eyes find his. “You could write a journal about the things you remember, just to keep them in case you forget’em. If you want to, of course.”

Castiel smiles. “That sounds great, Dean. Thank you.”

Dean nods. “We’ll buy some journal on Amazon tomorrow, alright?”

“Alright.”

Dean knows that both he and Cas feel more relieved after Dean’s idea.

 

_____

 

They finally make it back home, waking Sam up the moment the Impala is parked in the garage. The tall Winchester wakes up yawning and wishes them a goodnight as he leaves the garage. Dean and Castiel walk slowly, with their arms around each other, feeling a bit tired and sleepy.

Dean closes their bedroom door while Castiel begins to get undressed. Dean watches him, still a bit worried about him. Things will be okay. He even asked Cas if he could read those files, and Castiel told him that he could. If Cas doesn’t have any issue on letting Dean read the files about angels who become human and their memory loss, then it means that it isn’t as severe as Dean thought. It is still something bad, but not too serious.

“Are you going to keep watching me getting undressed?” Castiel asks as he begins to unzip his jeans.

“It’s something worth watching,” Dean says with a smirk. Castiel looks at him with a sassy look, a bit exasperated with him. Dean chuckles and walks towards him. “You look fucking great.” He gets his hands on Cas’ arms and caresses them, feeling the amazing shapes of his strong muscles. “You’re getting hotter with every passing day.”

Castiel smiles, shyly. “Doing yoga helps.”

Dean chuckles and looks at his husband again. “You’re getting all beefy and meanwhile I have a horrible tummy.”

“I love your tummy,” Castiel says with a pout, sounding upset about Dean not liking his tummy.

“Yeah, sure.”

Castiel squats in front of him and pulls up Dean’s shirt until his tummy is revealed and presses several kisses on it, making Dean blush. He presses many kisses, and when he is done, he looks at Dean and says. “I love everything about you, Dean.” He rises and then cups his face and kisses him. “Everything.”

“Would you still love me if I got fat?”

“Of course.”

“So, you wouldn’t want me to get thin again?”

“No.” He kisses him again. “But I would get you to the doctor to check your cholesterol levels.”

Dean chuckles. “You always worry about my cholesterol.”

“That’s because I don’t want to lose you soon.” He looks at him and Dean can see that his eyes are glassy. “It’s not about you getting fat; it’s about you not being healthy.” He rests his forehead against Dean’s and gets his hands on Dean’s hips. “Humans’ health is delicate, and I don’t want to lose you because of something you could have prevented.”

“You won’t, I promise,” Dean says, cupping his face and looking at him directly in the eyes. “I’m afraid you’re gonna have to put up with me for a long time.”

Castiel smiles. “I think I will be happy to put up with you for a long time.” He kisses him, and Dean melts into it. “I love you.”

Dean grins. “I love you.”

They kiss again and keep taking off their clothes, until they are only wearing their underwear and their t-shirts. They get on bed and Castiel little spoons Dean. They wish to each other a good night and switch off the lights.

“Hey, Cas,” Dean says after a while.

“Yes, Dean?” Castiel says, almost whispering.

Dean caresses Castiel’s hands, which are resting on his tummy. “Thanks for choosing me.”

Castiel kisses his nape and tightens his arms around Dean. “Always, Dean.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading, for the kudos, the bookmarks, the comments and the subscriptions :)

“I like these socks,” Castiel says as they pass by the clothing section of the supermarket.

“Cas, you’ve got tons of socks, you don’t need more,” Dean says, grunting. Somehow, his husband really likes socks, and not typical socks; he likes the ones with patterns or awful designs or with bees on it. This time, Castiel is looking at some purple socks with green dinosaurs. The funny thing is that those socks aren’t for kids. “You’ve got such a terrible taste is socks.”

Castiel ignores him and puts the socks into the chart. “These are really nice,” he says with a big smile as he grabs a pair of socks that attempt to look like a watermelon.

Dean rubs his face and wonders how his husband can really like that. He ends up with his elbow on the handle and with his hand covering his mouth, watching how Castiel picks up some of the most horrible socks in the store. He will end up wearing one of each pair, because in the mornings, he just doesn’t care if they match or not. He is a mess when it comes to socks, apparently.

Suddenly, something catches Dean’s eyes. Somebody left some black, lacy panties on the sock section. Probably the person who left them there didn’t want to buy it and left it on the nearest places they were, which was the sock section.

Looking at those panties makes Dean think about how he hasn’t told Cas about how he secretly likes to wear panties once in a while. He actually has a pair of pink panties he bought many years ago, but he hasn’t worn them for almost as long as he bought them. He isn’t ashamed about it, but more like embarrassed, because he was raised in a way that makes him feel bad about liking to wear a piece of clothing that it is supposedly only destined to be part of a woman’s wardrobe, not of a man’s.

He knows that Cas is really accepting and open minded, but Dean hasn’t found the courage to tell Cas about that. He fears that Cas would find it weird or uncomfortable, even if Cas has never felt like that when it comes to Dean, but Dean also feels embarrassed about admitting that he likes wearing panties and that he owns a pair of them that he actually bought for himself because he loves the feeling of it.

“Dean?” Castiel asks, interrupting Dean’s train of thought. “Are you alright?” he asks, really worried, and he places his left hand on top of Dean’s one, caressing it reassuringly.

“Yeah, I just drifted off, sorry,” Dean says, looking away from the panties to look at Cas. “I just wanted you to have some alone time with those ugly-ass socks.” He smirks, as a way to show Cas that he is alright and derive the conversation to a safe place.

Castiel glares him. “I want to divorce you.”

Dean smiles and then he looks at the amount of socks Castiel got in the chart. There is about ten pairs of it, all of them are extremely ugly, but there are ones that catch Dean’s eyes and he grabs them, looking at them in disgust. “Pizza socks?” he asks, looking at the failed realistic pepperoni and cheese pattern. “I’m really questioning why I fell in love with you, right now.”

Castiel snatches them and puts them back in the chart. He pushes Dean away and starts rolling the cart. “Now you understand how I feel when you use that terrible sense of humor of yours.”

“That’s a low punch, Cas!”

It makes Castiel smile, and Dean knows he will never stop falling in love with that smile. He quickly reaches him and gets his arm around his shoulders, kissing his cheek, feeling how Cas’ smile widens.

“You’re such a dick,” Dean whispers.

Castiel’s left arm gets around the small of Dean’s back. “And you are such an assbutt.” He nuzzles Dean’s cheek. “And sometimes a pain in the ass as well.”

Dean leans closer to Castiel’s ear and whispers, “That’s ‘cause my cock’s so big that your ass suffers sometimes.”

“Dean!” Castiel exclaims, showing him away, and Dean laughs, bringing the attention of the other customers. “You are unbelievable.” He shakes his head and blushes.

Dean comes back next to him and kisses his temple. “I’m fucking terrible, babe.”

“Yes, you are.” He looks at Dean, who is smirking. “You shouldn’t be proud of that.”

“I know that, deep down, you love how terrible I am.”

Castiel gives him a soft look. “I truly do.” He leans and pecks Dean’s lips. “Even if you can be both exasperating and frustrating.”

He arches his eyebrows and gives him an accusatory look. “You’re not perfect either.”

Castiel smiles, and Dean loves that smile so fucking much.

 

_____

 

Dean sighs, nervously, as he goes to the kitchen. He knows that Castiel is there and he guesses that he must be finishing his tea. Since they came back from the supermarket, he is been contemplating about telling Cas about the panties thing. He doesn’t want to have any secrets in their relationship, and Cas has always been really supportive about everything, so Dean doesn’t know why on earth he hasn’t told Cas about the panties.

Because he is so self-insecure.

He has grown a lot and he has found himself being comfortable with things he thought he would never be allowed, thanks to the shitty job John Winchester did as a father. But Dean still has some stuff to work on, and he has come to terms with himself and accept who he is, but there are some points he still needs to consider and work on them.

The moment he steps into the kitchen, Castiel looks at him and greets him with that smile of his, but it instantly turns into a worried frown when he notices how stiff and nervous Dean looks.

“What’s wrong?” Castiel asks, standing up from his chair and walking towards Dean.

“Can we— can we go to the bedroom and talk?” Dean says, trying not to look at those beautiful blue eyes. They could talk in the kitchen, but he doesn’t want to risk getting caught in the conversation he wants to have with his husband by Sam or Charlie.  
“Of course.” He grabs Dean’s hand and gives him a calming squeeze, a gesture that Dean appreciates.

They walk to their bedroom in silence, and Castiel is the first one to step in, being Dean the one who closes the door. He sighs and rests his forehead against the cold wood, and feels Cas’ hand reaching his shoulder, turning him around so their eyes can meet.  
“Dean, what’s wrong?” Castiel asks.

“Nothing’s wrong,” Dean says, and it’s the truth. Nothing is wrong, exactly. He rubs the back of his neck and looks at Cas’ puzzled face. “I— I don’t really know how to say this.”

“Please, don’t tell me you have made some kind of deal.”

“What? No! What makes you think that?”

Castiel gives him an obvious look. “You have a tendency to make deals, and you are really upset.”

Dean huffs. “No, it’s not that. It’s—” He clears his throat and looks at his feet, feeling how his face begins to flush in embarrassment. He takes a deep breath and looks at his husband. “I like wearing panties,” he finally blurts out.

Castiel blinks perplexed. “Okay,” he simply says, as if Dean just confessed that he likes pecan pie.

Now, Dean’s the one that blinks perplexed. “Okay? You don’t find it weird or inappropriate?”

“No. Why would I?”

Dean sighs, relieved. Everything he feared was just part of his paranoia and his self-loathing. He pinches the bridge of his nose and closes his eyes, smiling a bit nervously. “Of course you wouldn’t.”

“Dean,” Castiel says, getting his hand on Dean’s wrist and pulling his hand from his face. His fingers rest on the inner of his wrist, his thumb moving is soothing circles. “Did you think I was going to think less of you because you like to wear panties?”

Dean nods and rests their foreheads together. “Yeah.”

“Dean, beloved.” He gets his free hand on the inner of Dean’s other wrist and makes soothing circles there as well. “I don’t care what kind of clothes you like wearing, my opinion of you isn’t going to change because of what you wear.”

“Yeah, but panties aren’t for guys, y’know?”

“That’s because you humans tend to apply genres to everything. The world would be better if you didn’t impose them.”

Dean smiles. “Yeah, I know. It’s just that I’ve grown believing that, so it’s hard for me to admit that I like something that I was taught not to like. It’s hard to get rid of that.” He takes a deep breath and lets himself get lost in the sea of Castiel’s eyes; it is always comforting. “Same thing happened when I found out I was bisexual. It took me decades to finally stop hiding it and stop being closeted.”

“I know.” He stands on the tip of his toes and kisses him, sweetly. “Wear anything you like, Dean. I’m not going to judge you or love you any less. What you wear doesn’t define you.”

“You’re the best, Cas.” He kisses Castiel’s lips and gets his arms on his hips. “And I also feel like that about your ugly socks.” He smiles and Castiel shakes his head, but he smiles too. “I don’t love you any less for wearing them.”

“I am well aware of that, Dean.” He kisses him again, cupping his face, both of them humming into it. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah. You always make things better. That’s one of the best things about you.”

“I have a past that says otherwise.”

“Nobody’s perfect, Cas. We all have made mistakes.” He pecks his lips and then pulls away. “Thanks a lot for being so supportive and understanding, Cas.”

“You don’t have to thank me anything, Dean.”

Dean smiles. “I’m gonna make some pie. Wanna help me?”

Castiel grins. “Of course.”

 

_____

 

After dinner, the four of them play some Mario Kart and then they call it a day and go back to their bedrooms. The old heat of the bunker makes their bedrooms warm, but the halls are still a bit chilly, but at least it is still better than outside. Winter is almost there and the temperatures in Kansas are dropping more and more.

Castiel stretches himself after closing their bedroom door and Dean can’t help grinning at him. Castiel catches him staring and he frowns and tilts his head, but Dean doesn’t answer him and begins to take off his boots, sitting on the bed. He notices the journal he bought for Cas, standing on the bedside table and he grabs it.

“Been writing about your memories?” Dean asks, caressing its leather cover.

Castiel hums in affirmation. “You can read them. You don’t need my permission.”

Dean turns to look at Castiel, who is on the opposite side of the bed, taking off his boots. “It’s your personal stuff, Cas. Of course I need your permission.”

“Then, you fully have it.”

Dean nods and opens the journal, seeing that the first page is written in enochian. He doesn’t understand the whole text, but he recognizes Castiel’s name because he has that name tattooed in that same language in the inner of his right wrist and he has memorized the letters. He turns the page and sees that it is written in English and it narrates some of the first memories Castiel remembers. Dean reads it over and turns another page, trying to get a quick glimpse about Cas’ memories. He feels like he is intruding something really personal, and even though Cas has granted him permission to read it, Dean doesn’t want to snoop.

“You’ve written a lot,” Dean comments as he quickly turns the pages. He feels the bed dip and finds Castiel sitting next to him. “Is this helping you?” He closes the journal and hands it to Castiel.

“Very, indeed, “Castiel answers. He looks at the journal and caresses the cover, just like Dean did a few moments ago. “Like I told you, I’m not worried about forgetting some of the things I might forget as I get older, but it is reassuring to have most of my memories written here.”

“I’m glad it helps.” He kisses his cheek and Castiel smiles.

While Castiel puts the journal on his bedside table, Dean keeps getting undressed. Cas is already on his boxers and t-shirt, while Dean still has to take off his boots, jeans and shirt. He is too used to change his clothes, so he is quick with it.

When he is only wearing his boxers and t-shirt, he looks at his wardrobe and then at Cas, who is writing something on his journal with a pencil. He does that sometimes. He writes some of the memories he wants to write next on pencil, in case he forgets, and then he erases that list when he is done. He does that on the last page of the journal.

Dean seizes that occasion and he quickly goes to their wardrobe and kneels, finding the box where he keeps his pink panties and quickly takes off his boxers and puts the panties on. He sighs, nervously, enjoying the feeling of the fabric against his skin; he forgot how good they felt. He turns around, finding that Cas is still showing his back to Dean as he puts the pencil and the journal back inside the drawer.

“Cas,” Dean simply says, his nerves slipping into his voice.

“Yes, Dean?” Castiel asks as he turns around. He looks at Dean and his face completely changes as he looks at the panties and then at Dean, who is blushing and feeling embarrassed and exposed as he stands there, not knowing what to do or say. “Dean, you look beautiful,” Castiel says, not taking his eyes of Dean.

Dean didn’t think he could blush even more. “Thanks, Cas.”

Castiel stands up and walks towards him, with his eyes fixed on Dean. His hands immediately come to the hem of the panties, his fingers brushing the soft fabric of them and Dean shivers. “You even look more attractive than usual.”

Dean chuckles, his nerves and embarrassment completely gone, and he gets his hands on the dip of Castiel’s hips. “I can’t believe these are turning you on.”

“You don’t have to do much to turn me on,” Castiel says in that low voice that drives Dean insane. He gets his fingers under the panties, brushing the golden hairs that grow on his groin, going further, until they find the base of his cock. “You have a huge effect on me,” he whispers, almost into Dean’s mouth and Dean can’t wait anymore and kisses him, desperately, until both of them run out of air. “I want to fuck you.”

Dean moans. “Yes, please.”

They go back to kissing, hard and desperate. From all the different reactions he thought he would expect from Cas after seeing him wearing panties, wanting to have sex was on the bottom of the list. But Dean is so glad about the turn of the events, not only because sex with Cas is always awesome, the best he’s ever had, but because Cas likes the panties and he hasn’t show any judgement about the whole thing, and he also finds them attractive. Dean is so damn happy about it.

They take off each other’s t-shirts before they fall onto the bed, being Dean the one with his back pressed against the mattress. Castiel deepens the kiss, and Dean moans into the kiss, getting his hands on Castiel’s hair, raveling it even more, and rolling his hips, seeking that maddening friction.

Castiel’s hands trace down Dean’s body until his fingers find his nipples and he beings to stroke them and pinch them, drawing from Dean more moans. The ex-angel moves his lips and leaves a trail of kisses and some hickeys on Dean’s neck and collarbone, and he also bites Dean’s earlobe, earning him a loud moan from Dean.

Castiel kisses Dean’s lips briefly before he moves away, settling himself in between Dean’s legs, kneeling on the mattress. His presses his hand on the panties, feeling the hard line of Dean’s cock, still trapped inside the pink fabric. Dean hisses at the pressure. Then, Castiel leans and starts mouthing his cock, dampening the panties, and Dean moans as he spreads his legs, loving the feeling.

Dean closes his eyes and gets his hand on Castiel’s hair, feeling how one of Castiel’s hands is on his thigh and how his fingers brush the hem. He eventually sneaks his fingers and starts caressing Dean’s rim. Precome spurts from Dean’s cock, staining the panties, but he doesn’t mind it.

Finally, Castiel frees Dean’s cock, slowly, being really delicate with the pink underwear. Dean lifts his hips, helping him, and he sighs when he feels the air on his cock. Castiel folds the panties carefully, and places them of the bedside table, and Dean is really grateful because Cas seems to understand that the panties mean something special to him.

Dean gets his hand on Castiel’s nape and pulls him into a needy kiss as his other hand sneaks into Castiel’s boxers and gives his cock a few strokes before taking those away, throwing them onto the floor.

“Fuck me without a condom,” Dean mumbles into those wonderful and addictive lips. “I wanna feel you.”

“Of course,” Castiel says before kissing him again and pinning him to the bed.

As they kiss, Castiel gets the lube and Dean hears how he opens the cap and spreads it on his hand and on his cock. Without pulling away from the fervent kiss, Castiel finds Dean’s hole and gets his finger in, and Dean mewls.

He keeps opening Dean up until he has four fingers and stretches them, touching his prostate a couple of times, sending a bolt of pleasure through Dean. He pulls his fingers out when Dean is loosened enough and cleans his hand on the sheets.

Dean immediately gets his legs around Castiel’s waist and pulls him down to meet him in a passionate kiss before Castiel starts to push his cock inside. Both of them moan at the feeling.

It doesn’t take too long for Dean to adjust around Cas and then, the ex-angel begins to fuck him and Dean isn’t able to form any kind of coherent thought. All he can do is kiss Cas, touch him, roll his hips and moan his name over and over again, clenching around him every time his cock touches that sweet spot.

He trembles under Cas with every thrust that hits that sweet spot and Castiel does the same when Dean gets so tight around him. The ex-angel moves his hands until he finds Dean’s and they lace their fingers and they kiss again.

Dean spreads his legs wider, allowing Cas to have more room and giving him the leverage he needs to slide into him perfectly and aim his prostate easily, making both of them moan and loll their heads, moaning each other’s names. Dean loves it when he feels so full and with Cas on top of him, with their bodies pressed together and moving in the same rhythm.

Dean closes his eyes and lets out a moan as he arches his back, meeting Castiel’s thrusts with a roll of his hips. He does not only feel full; he also feels loved, like he always does when they are making love, regardless of their positions. Cas is like that; he manages to make Dean feel so loved and special. His touches, his kisses, his moans and his movements are constantly telling him how much he loves Dean, and Dean hopes that what he does, says the same. Cas gives and gives, and Dean has never been used to that; he has always given but nobody has given him anything, and it is amazing to feel worth enough to receive from someone you love.

He kisses Cas again as they keep moving onto each other, and Castiel moans into it, cupping Dean’s face and looking at him in that way that leaves Dean breathless.

Dean moans loudly and buries his face in the crook of Castiel’s neck. “Fuck, Cas, I’m gonna come, I’m—” But before he can finish his sentence, his orgasm hits him and he comes hard, painting both of their bellies.

It only takes Cas one more thrust to come inside Dean, falling apart onto Dean and moaning his name, as if it was something holy, and Dean is sure that it must be like that for Cas.

Dean sighs, happy and sated and stretches his sore legs onto the mattress, nuzzling Castiel’s neck. The ex-angel is breathing hard, but his body is relaxed and warm, and Dean loves it.

Castiel ends up turning his face so he can look at Dean, and both smile before they share a sweet and brief kiss. Then, Castiel pulls away from him, almost lazily and he kneels onto the bed, with Dean’s legs in between his knees.

“You came really hard,” Castiel comments as he grabs some wipes and begins to clean Dean’s mess.

Dean nods. “This was awesome.” He chuckles and starts caressing Castiel’s thick and tanned thigh. “I wasn’t expecting you to like the panties and much less that they would turn you on. That’s been a fucking pleasant surprise.”

Castiel motions him to roll onto his stomach and Dean complies, getting his arms under his chin, feeling how Castiel carefully wipes his hole from Castiel’s mess. “You looked beautiful, Dean.”

Dean blushes. “Thanks, Cas.” He grabs the feather hanging around his neck and touches it, feeling its softness. He always does that when he is a bit unsure about something. “Would you be okay with me wearing them more often? Just like I do with boxers?”

“Dean,” Castiel says. He moves from Dean, who is completely clean, and lies on his side so he can be face to face with Dean. “You don’t have to ask me that kind of thing. If you want to wear them, wear them, and if you don’t, then don’t. It’s your body.”

“Yeah, I know, Cas, but—” He takes a deep breath and snatches the wipe from Cas’ hand to clean the come on his tanned belly. “I still feel a bit insecure about it. It’s not— It’s not that I don’t feel comfortable wearing them, but I have this thought in the back of my mind that tells me that I’m less of a man for wearing them.”

“That is such an irrational thought, Dean.”

Dean chuckles. “Yeah, I know.”

“Look at me,” Castiel says as he cups Dean’s face and tilts his head up slightly so their eyes can meet. “Your clothes don’t define you. And I’m still going to love you regardless of what you wear and I am never going to judge you for wearing those panties.”

Dean kisses him. “What did I do to get such a fucking awesome husband?”

“You sold your soul to a demon.”

Dean rolls his eyes. “Always with the hell card. You’re such a dick.”

Castiel arches his eyebrow. “Less than five seconds ago you were calling me an awesome husband and now I’m a dick. Make up your mind, Dean.”

Dean grins and throws the wipe, hoping it ends up in the bin. He gets his hands on Castiel’s face and kisses him. “I love you so fucking much.”

Castiel smiles and caresses Dean’s hair. “I love you, too, Dean.”

Dean presses closer against Castiel, who gets his arms around Dean and embraces him, tightly. Dean sighs, happily, burying his face in the curve of Castiel’s neck as he holds his husband as well, feeling loved and safe in Castiel’s strong arms.

 

_____

 

Dean goes to the library and finds Charlie, covering his eyes and sighing. “Something’s wrong?” Dean asks.

Charlie pulls her hands away and looks at him, surprised that she is no longer alone in the library. “Not exactly,” she says, biting he lower lip.

Dean walks towards the chair in front of her and sits down. “Talk to me.”

She sighs again and closes her laptop. “It’s about Maggie.”

“What’s wrong?” 

Charlie and Maggie met in one of the many conventions she had to attend because of work and they have been in a long distance relationship for six months. They talk every night and they are in love. It isn’t easy, but somehow, both of them have been able to make it work.

“She wants me to move in with her,” Charlie says. “And it’s something really awesome, but it also means I’m gonna have to leave you guys and that I’m not gonna be able to hunt anymore.” She sighs again and nibbles her lower lip. “She doesn’t know that I’m a hunter. She doesn’t even know about monsters, and I wanna keep her safe, but at the same time I feel guilty because she should know, but this isn’t something you can tell anyone, and there’s also the fact that I feel I’m being so selfish because I’m giving up helping and saving people over her.”

Dean takes a deep breath, letting the works of Charlie sink into her. “Well, I know from experience that lies and secrets don’t do any good, but— giving her the whole talk about monsters and revealing her that you are a hunter, it’s not something I would recommend you, because she’ll probably panic or think you’re insane. Also, it’s better to have that ignorance.” He sighs and looks at Charlie. “You’ll also keep her safe if you don’t tell her that. I know it’s a shitty thing, but it’s not like you hunt as much as we do, so it’s not like you have monsters waiting for you in every corner of the country wanting to take revenge upon you.”

Charlie huffs a laugh. “Yeah, I know, but I don’t like keeping secrets from her.”

“Yeah, I know, but that’s something you’ve gotta decide on your own. Do you want to tell her and risk everything? Or do you want to keep the secret and have the risk that she might find out eventually?”

Charlie grunts. “You’re not making this easier.”

“That’s the curse of a hunter’s life.”

“But you’re married to Cas and both of you are happy.”

“Yeah, but for starters, he was an angel, so he knows about monsters and hunters and all of that.” He gives her an obvious look and then he looks at his hand and starts playing with his ring. “Before we’ve got together I was scared about getting together because I thought I was gonna end up losing him one way or another, but always because of me. And I also feared the fact that he would get into the hunting life once he became human. The world has been quitter without demons and angels, but there are still monsters to hunt, and lately it seems that they’re back, not as much as they used to, but we still got a couple of them to deal with every month, and he always comes, and I always have this voice in the back of my head telling me that I might lose him in a hunt and it’s awful.” He takes a deep breath and pinches the bridge of his nose. “But in between hunts, we get a normal life, and I love it, but we manage to have this messy kind of life because we are aware of what’s out there and what this life means, and we haven’t thought about retiring yet.” He looks at Charlie and then he chuckles. “I’m just beating around the bush, aren’t I?”

She smiles. “A little, but don’t worry.”

“Charlie, if you love Maggie, then go with her. Nobody’s gonna judge you because you wanna give up hunting for someone you love. This life takes too much from every single one of us, so we deserve more than anyone to get some happiness. So go for it. It’ll be the best decision of your life.”

Charlie smiles and nods, and Dean can see her appreciation in her glassy eyes. “Thank you so much, Dean.”

 

_____

 

During almost his whole life, Dean has used alcohol as a way to clear his mind from all the shit in his head until the only thing he could feel in his mind was a buzzing feeling. He has also used alcohol to fall asleep, to ease the pain and of course, as a coping mechanism. He has also used sex as a way to forget about the world and not feel like crap for a small period of time.

But what most people don’t know is that, for anxiety, Dean has always smoked a cigarette or a couple of them, depending on the day. Smoking always relaxes him when he feels anxious about something. Sam has never liked it, so Dean has always hidden it from his little brother.

Right now, Dean is outside the bunker, leaning his back against the wall and looking up at the cloudy sky. He takes a long drag of the cigarette, feeling how the smoke fills him and then he lets it out, watching how it goes into the air until it becomes nothing. He closes his eyes, keeping the cigarette in between his lips.

He hears the bunker’s door being open and he sees Cas, coming out. When he spots the cigarette, Dean can see some worry in his eyes. Cas is one of the few people who knows about that habit of him.

“Want one?” Dean asks as he grabs the package of cigarettes.

Castiel grabs one and waits for Dean to hand him the Zippo lighter. Dean watches him, admiring his hands. Cas has such really nice hands. “I prefer joints,” Castiel says before taking a puff and leaning against the wall as well.

Dean chuckles. On one hunt in California, they both ended up really bad and hurt, and the doctor gave them some therapeutic marihuana to deal with the pain. Dean had to teach Cas how to take a toke and they both enjoyed that relaxed moment and make out session. Cas isn’t a smoker, but sometimes he enjoys smoking a joint or a cigarette because he also carries some stuff from the past that he can’t let go completely. Dean understands him.

“You could plant some pot in the greenhouse,” Dean suggests.

“Isn’t that illegal?”

“Yeah, but no one knows this place exists, so you could totally plant it.”

Castiel hums and takes another puff.

“How did you find me?” Dean asks, side-eyeing him, appreciating the picture of his husband smoking. Unlike Dean, Castiel keeps his cigarette in between his fingers.

“I looked for you in the garage, in the kitchen, in the bedroom and in the library. If you aren’t in any of those four places, you are probably out here smoking,” Castiel answers. He examines him with his eyes briefly before he makes a concerned look. “What’s troubling you? Are you still upset about the panties?”

“No, it’s not that.”

“Then?”

Dean sighs. “Have you talked to you Charlie?” he asks, and waits for Castiel’s answer. The ex-angel shakes his head. “She’s probably gonna leave and move in with Maggie. I’m happy about her, but I also feel sad, because I’m gonna miss her. You know goodbyes are hard for me.”

“I know. But I also know it won’t be a goodbye. It will be a see you later. Or a see you later, bitches.”

Dean chuckles. “Yeah, I know.” He takes a long drag and looks at his cigarette; he is about to finish it. “I’m such a selfish bastard.” He grunts, displeased with himself. “One of my best friends has found happiness and I’m here whining because she’s gonna leave.”

“It’s understandable that you feel sad about her departure,” Castiel says, placing his hand on Dean’s shoulder. “You are also happy for her, I know that you are.”

Dean huff. “Yeah, but that doesn’t excuse my behavior.”

“You are human, Dean. You have every right to feel the way you feel. She is like a little sister to you, and knowing that she is going to leave, hurts, even if at the same time you feel happy because she is going to feel happy.” He takes a drag and lets out the smoke. “I feel like that, too.”

Dean sighs and tilts his head up, until the back of his head feels the wall. He takes the last puff of his cigarette and throws it away. “She asked me for advice.”

“What did you tell her?” He hands him his cigarette and Dean takes it, taking a puff before handing it back to Castiel.

“To go with Maggie.”

“See? You aren’t a selfish bastard.”

Dean chuckles and grabs another cigarette. “Why do I always have such a hard time at letting people go?” He grabs his old Zippo, enjoying the familiar feeling of it on his hand and lights his second cigarette.

“Because all the people you have ever loved have left you at some point. It’s hard to forget that.” He takes a puff and slowly releases the smoke. “I hate that I’m one of those people. I kept leaving and I wasn’t aware about how much it hurt you each time.”

“You didn’t know, Cas. You thought I didn’t want you around. It’s also my fault, y’know? I should’ve told you.” He looks at Cas, noticing that his eyes are getting a bit glassy, and Dean knows he feels guilty about the past. The past is gone, and they have forgiven each other, but sometimes the past comes back and it hurts. “But you ended up staying, after all.”

Castiel looks at him and his look softens. “Of course, Dean.”

They remain in silence. Castiel smokes the last of his cigarette and throws its end, using his boot to extinguish its remaining life. Dean keeps smoking, without saying a word, aware that Cas knows that something else is making him feel anxious, but he doesn’t say anything because he doesn’t want to push Dean, so he stays there, giving him support.

Finally, Dean puts the cigarette in between his fingers and says, “That’s not the only thing that’s making me feel anxious or upset.”

Castiel turns his face to look at him. “What’s the other thing?” 

“Do you like the life we’ve got?” Dean asks, feeling how a pit forms into his stomach. Castiel frowns, and before he can talk, Dean talks first, “I mean, don’t you— don’t you want something away from hunting? I know we have a normal life in between hunts, but we’re still hunting, and I’m not sure if that’s what you really want, ‘cause I know you’d go to the end and beyond just ‘cause I’d go, but— are you satisfied with this life?”

“Yes, I am, Dean.”

Dean sighs and rubs his face. “How do I know you’re not saying that ‘cause you don’t wanna worry me?”

“Because I’m looking into your eyes, Dean,” Castiel states, with determination. He takes a step closer so he can be in Dean‘s personal space. “I can’t look into your eyes when I lie, you know that.”

Dean knows that’s true. He nods and rubs his face. “Okay.”

Castiel’s eyes soften and his hand cups Dean’s face. “Why are you asking me this now?”

“Because of the conversation I had with Charlie.” He takes a deep breath and leans onto the touch, seeking comfort. Dean has always been touch starved, and he tended to have sex to cease that starvation and to seek comfort. But all Cas has to do is put his hand on him and it heals him almost immediately. “It made me think that maybe you want something out of this life but you aren’t saying anything because of me.”

“I am happy with how things are, Dean. Aren’t you?”

“Yeah, I’m so fucking happy, Cas.” He smiles at him, letting him know that he is telling him the truth. “It’s just that I know there’s a part of you that wants a normal life, and I’m the one keeping you away from that.” He grabs Castiel’s hand and kisses his knuckles.

“We have a normal life in between hunts, as you have said, and I’m really happy with that. Hunts can be draining, but we are helping people, so I like them. And I’m also with the love of my life, which is extraordinary.”

Dean huffs and rolls his eyes. “Always a sap.”

“Always so defensive about it.” He pecks his lips, making Dean smile. “What about you? Do you want to give up hunting and have a normal life?”

Dean takes a deep breath. “I don’t know.” He takes a long drag and moves his face to let out the smoke so it doesn’t end up on Cas’ face. “I’ve thought about it, and I tried to have one in the past and it didn’t work out so well for me and the ones around me.” He takes another long drag and throws the end of his cigarette before looking at Cas’ worried face. “I’ve found some equilibrium with you, and it works for now, and I’m so fucking happy with it.”

Castiel arches his eyebrow, curiosity making its way to his face. “Are you implying that you are considering the idea of giving up hunting?”

“Not exactly considering, it’s more like a quiet thought in the back of my mind. I don’t know if someday I’m gonna say, let’s start a normal life before I reach my sixties, but you never know.” He shrugs and looks at Castiel. “Would you be okay if someday I decided to give up hunting and start living a normal life with some boring job?”

“Yes, I would. And I would also be okay if you decided to keep hunting.” He gets his arms around his hips, pulling him closer and Dean puts his around Castiel’s neck. “Would you be okay if I decided to give up hunting?”

“Of fucking course, Cas.”

The ex-angel nods and makes a tiny smile before he leans and kisses Dean, sweetly and tenderly, but it still makes Dean’s knees go a little weak. “Do you still need to smoke another cigarette?”

Dean smiles. “No, I don’t.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading, for the comments, the kudos, the bookmarks and the subscriptions :)
> 
>  **IMPORTANT:** My finals are coming, so I have to take an hiatus :( The next chapter won't be posted until **June the 11th**. I'm sorry for making you wait for over a month, but I really need to study :/

“Dean—” Castiel moans as Dean kisses on his neck and his hand traces down his body, reaching his cock. “Sam is going to get pissed.”

Dean moves his mouth and looks at Castiel with an arched brow and a teasing look. “I don’t like the fact that you’re thinking about Sammy when I have my hand on your cock.”

Castiel rolls his eyes.

Dean chuckles, amused, and kisses Castiel, loving how the hot water of the shower falls down onto their bodies. This motel goes to his list of top motels with better water pressure and temperature.

He gets his mouth on the skin behind Castiel’s ear, a spot that drives him crazy and he kisses it while his hand slowly strokes Castiel’s hard cock. “I was thinking about sucking this hard and long cock of yours,” Dean says with a low voice. He squeezes the head of his husband’s cock, and Castiel groans. “But we’re running out of time.”

“You are such a fucking teaser.”

Dean laughs. Castiel only curses when they are having sex or when he is pissed off. “It’s so fun to tease you.” He kisses him, passionately, drawing out moans from him.

“Just blow me already,” Castiel says, having a hard time to breath; Dean still has that effect on him when he kisses him.

Dean pouts. “You know I like taking my time.”

“Dean—”

“Yeah, yeah, I know. We’re gonna be late to our meeting with the sheriff.” He pecks his lips and kneels in front of him.

The shower isn’t big, but at least it allows Dean to kneel in front of Castiel and take his cock in his mouth. The moment he wraps his lips around the head, Castiel sighs, relieved. He gets his hands on Dean’s hair, helping him to swallow him in one bob, until his nose is pressed against the dark and curly hairs of his groin.

Dean keeps bobbing his head and swirling his tongue around the shaft, swallowing his cheeks. Castiel tries to make his moans sound lower than usually, but they still echo against the walls of the bathroom. Dean moans around Castiel’s cock, loving the feeling of it, increasing the speed, feeling how Castiel tenses with every bob of his head and how he starts moaning in enochian. Dean knows it is only a matter of seconds until Castiel comes in his mouth, so he takes all of Castiel in one movement, pressing his lips and hollowing his cheeks to make it happen faster.

Castiel comes and his nails dig Dean’s scalp, moaning his name as loud as always, and Dean moans and feels his cock twitch with that.

When Cas is done, he stands up, with the help of Castiel and they share a passionate kiss. “You don’t complain about the time anymore right now, huh?”

“Don’t be so cocky.”

They keep kissing and suddenly, they hear a loud knocking on the bathroom’s door. “Would you please stop doing whatever the hell you are doing and come out?! We’re gonna be late!” Sam yells.

“I still have to blow you,” Castiel murmurs.

Dean grins. “Sam’s gonna be so pissed.”

Castiel shrugs and kneels in front of him, and before he wraps his lips around Dean’s erection, Dean yells, “Just five more minutes, Sam!”

Dean doesn’t hear his brother’s grunting because all he can focus on is Castiel’s mouth and tongue around him, swallowing him in one perfect motion, and Dean moans and gets both of his hands on Castiel’s hair.

He gives him a stellar blowjob, hollowing his cheeks and pressing his lips, moving his head with the adequate speed and moaning around his cock. He swirls his tongue around his length and swallows him completely a couple of times, making Dean moan loudly and filthily.

He comes in Castiel’s mouth, moaning his name, almost brokenly, feeling how his legs turn into jelly. When he is done with his release, Castiel smiles and stands up, kissing Dean sweetly.

They still have to take a proper shower, but Sam can wait a little bit more.

 

_____

 

“You two are inviting me over a vegan restaurant once we are done with this case,” Sam says, glaring at Dean, who is driving.

Dean groans. “Sammy, you’re overreacting.”

“I heard everything, Dean. I had to get out the motel in the middle of winter and wait until you two were done. I thought we had an agreement. When the three of us share the same motel room, sexual displays are forbidden!”

“That only applies to the room, not the bathroom,” Dean states with a casual look.

Sam glares him.

“We apologize, Sam,” Castiel says. “We will invite you to that vegan restaurant.” Dean looks at him from the rearview mirror, about to protest, but Castiel speaks first, “He is right, Dean. We both should have respected that.”

Dean shakes his head. “I gave you the chance to not do it, so it’s all your fault.”

Castiel glares him. “It is difficult to say no to someone when they are stroking your dick.”

“You two are gonna be the death of me,” Sam wails.

“Sorry, Sammy,” Dean says, smiling, but he also means his apology. “Let’s talk about the case, shall we?”

“Yeah, please.” He clears his throat and opens his laptop. “Ryan Morris, forty nine, was found dead in his car, with all the doors locked, with a hole in his chest and a burnt heart.”

“That whole burnt heart still puzzles me,” Dean comments as he parks the Impala in front of the sheriff’s department. “Why make a hole in his chest and then burn his heart? Makes no sense.”

Sam arches his eyebrow. “Does any of the things we see almost every day make sense?”

“Monsters have their rules, Sammy. Even if they’re insane.” He stops the car and removes the keys from the ignition. The three of them get out of the car and walk towards the building. “My bet’s that it’s a ghost.”

“Ghosts don’t have that kind of strength. They can do tons of things, but opening a hole in a man’s chest and burning his heart isn’t something that easy to achieve.”

“That depends on how angry the ghost is,” Castiel intervenes. “And how old they are.”

Sam makes a thoughtful pout. “That’s possible. We haven’t run into a ghost that powerful yet.”

“We’ve run into some that were quite powerful,” Dean adds.

Their meeting with the sheriff reveals them that there were two other previous victims that died in the same way. Their visit to the morgue reveals them, thanks to Dean’s EMF meter, that they are dealing with a ghost.

The next thing they do is to separate and talk to the respective families of the three victims. Dean decides to go and visit Ryan Morris’ widow, because the house is the furthest from the motel and he is the one driving and the one who drops Castiel by the house of the first victim’s family and drops Sam by the house the second victim’s family.

Mrs. Morris is devastated by her husband’s dead. Dean can understand her; if Cas died, he would be like her, or worse.

Dean is sitting around the dining’s room table, in a fancy chair. The woman is sitting in front of him, looking out at the window, with glassy eyes. Dean waits for her to find the strength to talk.

“I still think this is a bad dream and that I’m going to wake up and find Ryan alive,” she says with a low voice that almost sounds like a whisper. “I can’t believe he is gone.”

“I’m sorry for your loss, Mrs. Morris,” Dean says.

She turns her face and looks at Dean. She makes a painful smile. “We were actually mad at each other, that night. We were arguing about where to go on our holidays and things got bad. Last year we went to a place I wanted to go, and this year it was Ryan’s time to choose, but I didn’t want to go to Argentina and we argued. I was going to apologize to him once he came home, but I didn’t get the chance to—” She wails and covers her mouth, trying to suppress her sorrow, but failing. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t need to apologize.”

She smiles, with gratitude and notices Dean’s ring. “Are you married, agent Daltrey?”

Dean looks at his white gold ring and smiles. “Yeah.”

“Do you love your wife?”

Dean chuckles. “Actually, I’m married to a man.”

She smiles, a bit embarrassed. “Sorry, my bad.”

“It’s okay.” He shrugs it off. “You’re not the first one who assumes I’m married to a woman.”

She nods. “Do you love your husband?”

“Yes, I love him. So much indeed.”

“Even when you argue?”

Dean chuckles. “Yeah. He can be a bit insufferable, but I still love him.” He looks again at his hand and caresses the ring. “Luckily, we don’t argue too much and we always make up pretty fast.”

She smiles. “That’s sweet.” She sighs and then she wipes her eyes. “I’m sorry, I’m rambling. You wanted to ask me some questions, right?”

Dean nods. “Yeah. Did you notice anything unusual in your husband’s behavior before his dismissal?”

Dean’s conversation with Mrs. Morris doesn’t help him. Her husband didn’t do anything out of the ordinary or seemed to have enemies, and much less he didn’t see to do any kind of weird stuff that she noticed. And the garage doesn’t help him too much; only to confirm that it was a ghost, but it doesn’t give him a reason of why Ryan was killed.

As Dean leaves the house, he texts both Cas and Sam, asking them if they want him to pick them up. Sam answers by telling him that he is still interviewing the family, but Cas tells him that he can pick him up, so Dean drives to where he is.

“Hey, handsome,” Dean says as Castiel opens the door and gets in the Impala. “Need a ride?” he asks with a smirk.

Castiel frowns and squints his eyes. “Yes, I do. I texted you about it.”

Dean rolls his eyes. “Always so literal.” He shakes his head and manages to see how Castiel’s confused face doesn’t fade away. “How did it go?”

Castiel sighs. “All Valerie’s family told me was that she was a good girl with good grades at college. What about you?”

“Same thing. Ryan was a nice husband with an ordinary life. He had his things, but nothing too troublesome.” He takes a deep breath and keeps driving. “So, we’ve got two victims loved by their families and who claim that neither of them did anything bad.” He looks at Castiel, who nods and hums. “Maybe that’s the connection between the victims and why the ghost attacked them.”

“Maybe they did something bad and their families don’t know and that’s why the ghost killed them,” Castiel suggests. He gets his elbow where door and window meet and he leans his temple onto his hand. “We have to wait until Sam is done with the second victim’s family. Are we going to pick him up?”

“Not yet. He’s still with the family. So first, we’re gonna get some food ‘cause we’re gonna have to do some research and we’re gonna need food for that. What do you feel like eating?”

“Anything cooked by you.”

Dean rolls his eyes but chuckles. “We don’t have a kitchen in the room and you know that.”

“I was just testing my luck.” He looks at Dean with a fond look. “Does Chinese food sound right for you?”

“Yeah.”

After picking up their take-out food and picking up Sam, the three of them go back to the motel, switch on their laptops and begin to do research on each victim as they eat. The second victim, Jules, was also considered a normal man with a normal life.

For hours, they look onto their lives, trying to find something in common, something that joins them together, but the only thing the three victims had in common is that they lived in that town of Montana. Ryan was a forty year old man that owned several chain foods on the country. Valerie was a college student who was studying to become a vet and Jules was a retired man.

Dean groans and pinches the bridge of his nose, frustrated and tired. Ghosts always attack their victims because of a reason. The three victims don’t share anything in common except their death. They even lived far from each other.

Dean blinks perplexed. “Son of a bitch,” Dean says.

“What?” Sam and Castiel say at the same time.

“We’ve been busy thinking about what these three victims have in common, but we haven’t asked ourselves how the fuck does the ghost move from one place to another. Ghosts are tied to objects and places, so, how is it that the ghost has been able to kill three different people in three different places?”

Sam huffs. “Yeah, we didn’t think about that. We were so focused on the deaths that we forgot that important detail.”

“Good point,” Castiel says kissing Dean’s cheek. He always pecks him when Dean discovers something important about the case. Dean does the same. “The three victims died when they were in their homes, so the three houses must have something in common that the ghost’s spirit is tied to.”

“Or maybe it’s the area where the houses are.”

Dean makes a thoughtful face. “You mean that the piece of ground where those houses are could’ve belonged to our ghost?”

“There’s only one way to find out.”

Dean sighs and nods. “More research. Awesome…”

Castiel squeezes his thigh, trying to encourage him and Dean smiles.

After some long minutes, they finally find out that the ground of the three houses used to belong to the church. Unfortunately, there aren’t any digital files that tells them who used to own those lands, and they will have to visit the church tomorrow’s morning, because it is already closed.

They decide to call it a day and go to bed to get some well-deserved rest. Usually they get two separated rooms, but all the rooms were taken, so they had to end up picking a room with two queen size beds. Dean and Castiel barely fit in it, but neither of them complains, because they like to be pressed against each other. The downside is that the mattress is quite shitty and it doesn’t do any good to their backs.

“Even if you hear me snoring,” Sam says as he rolls onto his side after switching off the lights. “Don’t you dare have sex in that bed.”

Dean rolls his eyes. “We can always sneak to the Impala, don’t worry, Sammy.”

Sam grunts. “Jerk.”

“Bitch.”

Dean feels Castiel’s smile against the side of his neck and holds him tighter. “I’m not going to fall, Dean,” Castiel whispers, nuzzling his neck.

“I wouldn’t be so sure about that.”

Castiel smiles again and then, he kisses Dean’s lips. “Goodnight, beloved.”

“Goodnight, love.”

 

_____

 

Castiel grunts and groans when Dean’s alarm sounds. As Dean blindly grabs his phone to turn it off, Castiel’s grip on him becomes tighter, obviously wanting him to stay in bed. “You’re the worst morning person ever, Cas,” Dean mumbles, trying to get rid of the sleep remains.

The ex-angel, instead of answering him with words, grunts again and gets on top of him, pinning him on the bed and holding him tightly as he buries his face in the crook of Dean’s neck.

Sam, who is already sitting on his bed, laughs. “He’s like a koala.”

“More like an octopus,” Dean rectifies, looking at his brother, who finds the scene amusing. “C’mon, Cas, we’ve gotta go to the church and talk to the priest.”

“Thirty more minutes, Dean,” Castiel mumbles.

Sam chuckles and stands up. “Well, while you two try to get up, I’m gonna take a shower.”

“Cas, c’mon!” Dean exclaims, shaking his husband, but Cas has an incredibly strength even if he is sleepy and doesn’t feel like moving, something that will never stop both ceasing and frustrate Dean. “We’ve got work to do, Cas.”

Sam laughs again before closing the bathroom’s door behind him.

Dean sighs defeated, and rubs his face. “If you let me out of this bed, I’m gonna dress up and buy you two cups of coffee so you can have them before we get in the shower.”

That makes Castiel pull his face away from Dean’s neck and look at him with his sleepiest and grumpiest face, accompanied by that terrible bed hair, which Dean finds adorable. “Really?”

“Yeah.”

Castiel sighs, happily and rolls to his side, freeing Dean, who quickly gets out of bed, just in case Cas changes his mind. “You are the best, Dean. You are what you humans wrongly call, an angel.”

Dean rolls his eyes and laughs. “I’m married to Mister Grumpy.”

“And I’m married to Mister Loves Mornings, so get over it.”

After his words, Castiel buries his face in the pillow and Dean can’t help smiling. He watches him for a little before leaning and kissing his hairline, hearing Cas’ happy sigh. Then, Dean quickly puts his clothes on and heads to a cafeteria and orders four coffees to go; two for Cas, one for himself and one for Sam. They will have a proper breakfast later, after talking to the priest.

The moment Dean opens the motel room’s door, Castiel sits up on the bed, still wearing his grumpy face and extends his hand, so Dean quickly gives him the first coffee. Dean leaves the other ones on the bedside table and grabs his and drinks it while he sits on the bed, next to Castiel, who hands him the empty cup and Dean gives him the other.

“I hate mornings,” Castiel groans.

“Really?” Dean asks, sassily. “I had no idea.”

Castiel glares him. “It’s too early for your snarky comments, Dean.”

Dean chuckles and kisses his temple. “Sorry, babe, but it’s too funny to tease you while you’re grumpy.”

Castiel groans and takes a long sip of his coffee. “I miss the coffee I make at home.”

“Yeah, this is quite shitty, but that cafeteria’s the only one close to the motel, so…” He shrugs and takes a sip of his coffee. It’s not the worst coffee he has ever had, but the hot beverage needs some improvement. “At least you’ve got your caffeine dose.”

Castiel kisses his cheek. “Thank you.”

Sam comes out of the bathroom, fully dressed. The steam from the bathroom gets into the bedroom, and both Dean and Castiel feel the humidity coming from it. “You bought coffee?” Sam says, pleased.

“Yeah,” Dean says. “It’s quite shitty, but somebody here needed his daily dose of caffeine to get his ass out of the bed.”

Castiel elbows his side. “Don’t judge me.”

Dean smiles but shakes his head. “You done? We’ve gotta take a shower.”

Castiel nods as he takes the last sip of his coffee. “Yes, I am.”

“Don’t you dare do what you two did yesterday,” Sam warms with a bitch face.

Dean grins. “Sammy, you should know that the worst way to prevent something from happening, it’s forbidding it.”

Sam glares him.

 

_____

 

Even though the priest doesn’t seem to be very happy about their presence and their questions, he ends up giving them the files about the many priests over the years who owned lands in the town, a big list with old books that Dean wonders how they still survive in the conditions they are after all those centuries.

After some exhausting research, Sam is the one to find the priest they are looking for; a man from the eighteenth century that was one of the first priests to ever live in the town. He ended up being stabbed by the people in the town because he was almost as terrible as the Spanish inquisition.

They find out that he is buried in the local graveyard and decide to wait until night, because that’s the safest time to dig up a tomb and burn a body.

“He is still tied to the land,” Castiel says as they eat some burritos in the room. “Will it be enough to burn his body?”

“Yeah, ‘cause he’s buried somewhere that belonged to him,” Dean explains, wiping the hot sauce from his lips with a napkin. “That’s why he can move from one place to another. He’s somehow connected to all the lands he owned. By burning him, we remove the core that connects all the dots.”

Castiel nods and grabs some fries.

“I wonder why he decided to attack those victims,” Sam says. “Maybe they did something he thought it was immoral.”

“Nobody’s perfect, Sammy.” He takes a sip of his beer, appreciating the coldness of it in his throat even if outside it is freezing. “Be thankful this motel isn’t in a land that priest didn’t own, because we would’ve been dead by now.”

Sam chuckles and makes an agreement face. “Yeah.”

When night comes, the three of them drive to the graveyard. They have to take a long walk until they find the tombstone with the name of the man they are looking for.

Sam and Dean end up digging up because both of them lost to Cas at rock, paper and scissors, so the ex-angel remains at the edge of the tomb, lightening them up. Dean doesn’t know how Cas always manages to win them at that game when they have to dig up a grave.

The exercise helps both Winchester brothers to warm their bodies, but it is a really cold night, and every breath they take makes Dean feel as if he was breathing ice, and his bones suffer against the cold temperatures. He should have put on another layer of flannel.

Dean’s shovel makes a sound and the three of them know they have found the coffin. Sam and Dean remove the remaining dirt and open up the coffin, revealing a skeleton.

“Alright,” Dean says, turning his face to look at Cas. “Hand us—” But before Dean finishes his sentence, he sees that the priest is behind Cas. “Cas! Behind you!”

Castiel reacts immediately and grabs his shotgun, turning to shoot the priest, but the ghost is quick and powerful and throws Castiel with the shotgun away, hitting himself on the head against the trunk of an oak, leaving him unconscious.

“Cas!” Dean and Sam yell.

Dean immediately grabs the other shotgun and aims at the ghost, but even though Dean manages to shoot him, the priest manages to throw him away and the side of his face hits one of the sharpest tombstones, blood immediately appearing on his temple.

“Sam! Quick! The salt!” Dean yells.

Sam jumps from the hole and gets the salt, throwing a considerable amount into the open coffin. Dean begins to approach his brother and he looks at Castiel, who is still unconscious and something clenches at Dean’s stomach.

Sam yells as the ghost throws him away and Sam ends up on the floor, also hitting part of his face against a tombstone. Dean tries to shoot the priest with rock salt, but the ghost manages to throw him onto the floor and keep him there, something he also does to Sam, who tries to get away but he can’t.

The priest leans onto Sam and reaches to where Sam’s heart is, and Dean watches in horror, unable to move and knowing what the ghost is going to do to his little brother. Sam tries to fight, but the ghost’s power is incredible and doesn’t let them move a single inch.

Suddenly, the priest yells as his hand starts to burn and its fire spreads to his body. He pulls away from Sam, and both Winchesters brothers are able to move again. They look at the tomb, where Cas is standing, next to the fire he set on the skeleton and watches with rage how the priest burns.

The ghost explodes, like any other ghost, and Dean sighs, relieved.

“Sammy, you alright?” Dean asks.

Sam groans as he stands up. “Yeah. You?”

“Yeah.” He walks towards Cas, cups his face and kisses him, needy and relieved. It’s a known kiss for both of them; it’s one that they always share after they survive a hunt. “You okay, love?” He looks for any kind of wound on his head.

“Yes, Dean, I’m okay,” Castiel says. He also has his hands on Dean’s face and he tilts it so he can look his wound better. “You are hurt.”

“It’s just a cut.”

Sam approaches them and Castiel turns to look at the taller Winchester, noticing that he also has a cut, but he has it on his nose. “You are hurt, Sam,” Castiel says, pointing his nose.

Sam brings his hand to his nose and hisses when he touches his wound. “Nothing that can’t be cured at the motel.” He moves his hand and claps Castiel’s back. “Thanks for saving me, Cas.”

“Yeah,” Dean says, kissing Castiel’s temple and squeezing him against his side in an appreciative gesture. “Thanks for saving both of us.”

 

_____

 

“You should be healed first,” Sam complains.

“Shut up and let Cas take care of you,” Dean grunts as he takes a sip of a cold beer he grabbed from the Impala.

“I agree with Sam, Dean,” Castiel says.

“Shut up you too, Cas.”

Castiel takes a deep and frustrated breath and begins to heal Sam’s cut. “You are a stubborn assbutt.”

“And you’re a dick.”

“You two are terrible,” Sam says.

“Shut up, Sam,” Dean and Castiel says at the same time, which makes Sam press his lips into a thin line, trying to suppress a smile.

Castiel keeps healing Sam. He is good at healing. When he became human and decided to become a hunter, Castiel learnt how to heal wounds and things like that. He had some previous knowledge, but he wanted to expand it.

“It’s done, Sam,” Castiel announces.

Sam nods and smiles. “Thanks, Cas.”

The younger Winchester brother stands up from the chair and sits on the other one while Dean walks to the free chair and approaches it to Cas, who starts to clean the wound, something that stings and makes Dean hiss.

“You always hiss when I clean your wounds,” Castiel says, with a tiny smile that only Dean manages to see.

“Because it stings,” Dean replies.

Castiel gives him a fond look that Dean knows it means he finds something adorable.

“It’s not that deep, is it?” Dean asks.

“Not too much, luckily,” Castiel answers. “A few inches to the left and you would have lost your eye.”

“You’re great at delivering good news.”

Castiel glares him.

“Should we order some pizza?” Dean asks, looking at Sam. “I’m hungry.”

“Give me the keys of the Impala and I’ll drive to some pizza place I saw,” Sam says, standing up.

Dean gets his hand in his jeans’ pocket and throws them to his brother. “Drive her carefully.”

Sam gives him his brand own bitch face. “Cas, veggie or pepperoni?”

“Veggie, please.”

Dean rolls his eyes. “How dare you, Cas.”

Sam chuckles and nods while Castiel ignores Dean. “Don’t worry, Dean, I’ll get you a pepperoni one for you.”

“You better!”

Sam rolls his eyes but he smiles and leaves the room. Dean and Castiel remain in silence as Castiel carefully heals Dean’s wound. They even hear how Sam starts the Impala and how he drives out of the parking lot of the motel.

Castiel finishes by placing two butterfly stitches on the wound. “Done,” Castiel says.

“Thanks,” Dean says, pecking his lips.

Castiel smiles and nods. He stands up and gets all the medical stuff in their first aid kit, which he places inside their duffel bag. Dean stands up as well and walks towards Cas, who turns around when he has put the kit in its place and Dean crushes him in a tight hug, burying his face in Castiel’s shoulder.

“Dean,” Castiel says as he hugs him, his embrace being as tight as Dean’s. “Is everything alright?”

“Yeah,” Dean mumbles. He moves his face and rests his forehead against Castiel’s. “I just need this.”

Castiel nods. “Of course.” He kisses him, sweetly and slowly, and they hug for a while.

Sometimes Dean needs to feel Cas as close as this after a hunt. He needs the touch to make sure that Cas is still there. They don’t have to say anything, because words are unnecessary now, and they let their hold talk for themselves.

Dean pulls his hands away from the embrace and cups Castiel’s face, kissing him, tenderly, loving how Castiel hums into it.

Castiel smiles. “Better?” he asks, giving Dean a look that still holds some concern.

“Yeah, sorry,” Dean says, a bit embarrassed.

“Don’t apologize, Dean. You did nothing wrong.” He pecks his lips. Then, he caresses his face. “I love you.”

Dean smiles. “I love you, too.”

 

_____

 

Dean wakes up because their bed feels unusually cold. He opens his eyes and finds Cas’ side empty. He touches the spot, noticing that it still holds some heat from Castiel’s body. It is almost barely, but it is still there. Dean then proceeds to check the time and sees that it is six thirty two in the morning, so Dean knows where Cas must be and why he left their bed.

He gets up from the warm bed, his body instantly missing the warmth and coziness of it and Dean walks towards the wardrobe to get one of their thickest blankets and then he puts on his slippers and robe and walks out of their bedroom.  
The bunker is silent at that time. Not even Sam’s snores can be heard. The only sound Dean can hear is the sound of his steps.

He makes it to the war room and goes to the stairs, quickly getting out of the bunker, feeling the coldness of the winter against his body. Castiel is sitting on the ground, with his robe and a blanket of his own. He turns his face when he hears the door and slightly smiles when he sees Dean.

Dean sits down on the ground, too, next to Castiel, and covers himself with the blanket. “It’s fucking December and you’re out here wanting to see the sunrise. You’re fucking nuts.”

Castiel smiles timidly.

Dean gets his arm out of his blanket and puts it around Cas, covering it with Castiel’s blanket. Castiel immediately leans his head on Dean’s shoulder and sighs as Dean kisses the top of his head.

“Wanna talk about the nightmare?” Dean asks.

Castiel takes a deep breath. “It was about memories of terrible things I did in the past.”

“Those are the worst kind of nightmares; the ones from real life.”

Castiel nods. “I’m sorry I woke you up.”

“Don’t be.” He kisses him again and Castiel closes his eyes for an instant. “Y’know, for being the worst morning person in the universe, you really have no problem in staying here and watch the sunrise.”

“I am not the worst morning person every single day of the year. I have seven days in the whole year when I am actually a morning person.”

“Seven? I think it’s only three.”

Castiel chuckles.

Dean tightens his grip on Castiel. “Want me to bring you some cigarette?”

“No, I’m good,” Castiel murmurs. He snuggles against Dean’s side. “You are here. That’s all I need.”

Dean smiles and kisses him on the lips. “Okay.”

They remain pressed against each other and covered in their blankets. It is cold, really cold, but Castiel needs this, so Dean stays with him, keeping him close. They wait for the sun to rise in the horizon, changing the dark colors of the night to pastel ones. The sun appears, but it doesn’t warm up the atmosphere at all. But at least it is peaceful.

“We should head back inside,” Dean says. “We’re gonna freeze out here.”

Castiel nods and stands up. “Thank you.”

Dean rolls his eyes and smiles as he stands up. “You don’t have to thank me anything, Cas. You do the same for me.” He hugs him and kisses him. “Go back to bed. I’m gonna make some hot cocoa and bring it to the bedroom.”

“Okay.”

They get inside, and the moment Dean closes the bunker’s door behind him, he sighs pleased at the warm temperature of the bunker. He gives Cas the blanket so he can carry it back to the bedroom, and then he heads to the kitchen to prepare two mugs with hot cocoa. It doesn’t take him too long and he is soon walking to their bedroom, carrying their respective mugs.

When he gets inside their bedroom, Cas is already in bed, sitting in it. He greets Dean with a big smile and mumbles a thank you when Dean hands him the sweet beverage. Dean puts his mug on his bedside table while he takes off his robe and then he gets in bed, sitting as well and resting his back against the headboard. He grabs his mug and takes a sip, enjoying the taste.

“It’s not as perfect as the one you make,” Dean says with a pout.

“It’s perfect for me, Dean,” Castiel says, smiling.

Dean looks at him, noticing that something’s off about his husband. “What’s wrong?”

Castiel sighs and looks at the mug. He has both hands holding it, letting them warm with the liquid inside of it. “You know I am forgetting some angelic stuff, but— the worst stuff doesn’t go away. It even comes in the shape of nightmares.”

“We tend to remember the things we want to forget and we forget the things we want to remember. Human’s brain is like that.”

“That’s poetic.”

Dean huffs a dry laugh. He sighs and takes another sip. “I’ve forgotten tons of things during the years. Some of them were the kind of good stuff. But I still remember every failure and every mistake. I carry all of that with me. I’ve learnt from all of that, which is something good, because forgetting about that crap only makes you repeat the same crap, but sometimes I wish that terrible stuff was kind of sleeping in the back of my mind and it didn’t come back in the ways they come.”

“How do you deal with all of that?”

“I used to drink and drink until I fell asleep or I went on a hunt and killed some son of bitches. Sometimes I hooked up with strangers that I would quickly forget their name. Now all I have to do is be with you.”

Castiel smiles and blushes. “You are a sap.”

“You turned me into one.” He nuzzles his cheek and then kisses him. “You help me more than you realize, Cas.” He looks at his eyes, and Castiel stares at him too. “I know that sometimes my shit comes back, but you’re always there when I fall apart, and you do an awesome job at putting me back together.”

Castiel looks at him with emotion and kisses him. “You do the same to me, Dean. You are amazing to me.”

“Sap.”

Castiel smiles. “You started.”

Dean chuckles. He drinks the last of his hot cocoa and puts the mug aside. “Wanna sleep a little bit more?”

“Yes, please.” He drinks the remaining of his beverage as well and then, the two of them lie on their bed, covering themselves up to their noses. “I’m still a bit cold.”

“C’mere,” Dean says as he rolls onto his side and spreads his arms.

Castiel smiles and rolls onto his side, getting in Dean’s arms and holding him to, pressing their chests together. “How can you be so warm? You are like a heat.”

Dean laughs. “I don’t know, Cas.”

Castiel sighs and nuzzles Dean’s neck. “I love you so much, Dean.”

“I love you so fucking much, too, Cas.”

They fall asleep easily.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, I'm back! Sorry for the long waiting. And as always, thank you so much for reading, for the kudos, the comments, the bookmarks and the subscriptions :')

Dean sets the two dishes with waffles on the table and sits down next to Castiel. Sam is still sleeping. Every time they go to the California house, Sam always sleeps more than usual, it is as if that bedroom completely relaxed him from everything. Dean still doesn’t know what it is, but the California house has something that eases all of them. Maybe it is the presence of Castiel’s grace in its walls, protecting the place from bad things.

“When Sam wakes up,” Dean starts to say as he pours some whipped cream and strawberries onto his waffles. “We should go over the story we’re gonna tell Maggie when she and Charlie come over here.”

Castiel nods and hands Dean the chocolate syrup. “Of course.” He adds the same toppings to his waffles, and it makes Dean smile.

As they have breakfast, Dean feels how Cas’ socketed foot starts to rub on Dean’s leg, in a gentle gesture. Dean grins and blushes, noticing the poor attempt Castiel is making at trying to hide his smirk.

Dean takes a sip of the amazing coffee Castiel made and keeps eating his breakfast, cutting his waffles with more intensity than usually, and Castiel notices it.

“Dean,” Castiel says. He gets his hand on top of Dean’s and makes him drop the knife so they can hold their hands. Dean sighs, embarrassed. “Everything will be alright. Don’t worry about it.”

“What if Charlie’s girlfriend hates us?”

“She won’t.”

“How are you so sure?”

“You are really charming, Dean.” He kisses his cheek and with his thumb, he caresses Dean’s hand soothingly. “Even when you use that terrible humor of yours.”

Dean rolls his eyes but smiles. “I’m just worried. I’m not good at first impressions.”

“As long as you don’t stab her in the chest like you did with me when we met, you will do great.”

Dean glares him. “You didn’t even get me out of my fucking grave. You just rescued me and made me crawl out of my grave and then tried to speak with me with a high pitched sound that almost left me deaf, so I don’t know whose first impression was worst.”

“I still think it was yours.”

“Dick.”

“Assbutt.”

Dean arches his brows and gives him an obvious look. “You still married me, though.”

Castiel smiles. “It was love at first stabbing.”

Dean bursts into laughter and Castiel grins, pleased with himself, like he always is when he manages to make Dean laugh. “Man, our lives are so fucking weird.”

“Really? I didn’t know.”

Dean kicks his shin. “Stop it, Mister Sassy.”

“I’m Mister Winchester now, Dean.”

Dean grins and pecks his lips. “Yes, you are.”

They keep eating their breakfast and soon, they hear Sam’s footsteps on the staircase. The taller Winchester is wearing the robe he wears in the bunker. Even though the heat works better than the one in the bunker, they don’t turn it on during the morning.

“Good morning, guys,” Sam greets as he gets in the kitchen.

“Good morning, Sam,” Dean and Castiel say at the same.

“Are those my waffles?” Sam asks, pointing a spare plate with two waffles in it, and Dean hums in affirmation.

“Your mug with coffee is in the microwave,” Castiel says. “All you have to do is heat it as much as you want.”

“Thanks guys. I love it when you spoil me.”

“Don’t get used to it,” Dean says, making Castiel smile. “We’ve gotta talk about the details of our fake lives.”

“Let me have my coffee first at least.”

“Alright.”

“I thought Charlie was going to tell Maggie about hunting,” Castiel says with a frown.

Dean sighs. “It’s not something easy to confess, Cas. Or to explain. And it’s harder to make someone believe you.”

“But lies can destroy relationships. You and I are experts on that.”

Dean nods. He hates how many times they have lied to each other in the past. Thankfully, they have been honest to each other for a long time now. “I know. But that’s Charlie’s decision and we must respect it. She isn’t hunting anymore, not to mention that she wasn’t a hunter like us. She hunted in some occasions, but she didn’t grow up with this. It’s not such an important part of her life.”

Castiel nods, but he pouts.

“If you hadn’t been an angel, I’d have lied to you, too,” Dean says, which makes Castiel look at him with a frown. “Telling you would’ve complicated things, but it would’ve kept you safe from the shit I saw and you’d be better without knowing what bumps in the night.”

“It is kind of selfish,” Castiel says, without malice.

“Yeah. I know.”

“I didn’t tell Jess,” Sam intervenes. “Having a normal life was better and easier than telling her about the hunting life. We were happy. But sometimes I ask myself that if I told her about everything, maybe she would’ve been able to defend herself from Azazel.”

“You don’t know that,” Dean says. “We knew about him and look how long it took us to defeat him.”

“Yeah.” He sighs and then he looks at Cas. “Keeping such a huge secret sucks, and it makes you feel guilty constantly, but when you love someone, you don’t want that person to have to deal with that load you carry. By not telling them, they can have a normal and happy life, without having to worry about that stuff. And that’s something every hunter wishes for themselves at one point.”

Castiel takes a deep breath. “So it doesn’t matter if you choose to tell or not to tell that someone you love about monsters; you lose in every scenario.”

“Pretty much,” Dean says. “That’s why I’m so fucking thankful that you were part of the supernatural and hunting world, because it eases things so fucking much.”

“Are you thankful about the fact that you went to Hell?” Castiel asks, frowning, and Sam laughs.

“Are you being serious or are you teasing me? Because it’s hard to tell the difference.”

Castiel shrugs. “Maybe it’s both.”

Dean rolls his eyes. “I’m thankful that I met you. Even if it was in the worst place ever.”

“Now that you’re talking about that,” Sam says, clearing his throat. “For Maggie, where did you two guys met?”

“In Pontiac, Illinois,” Castiel answers. “Dean was having a rough time and he decided to take a break from his life and went to a motel that belonged to my family where I worked at as a carpenter.”

“I began to work in Pontiac as a mechanic and we became friends easily, and even though we had our rough times, we still were friends and after about eight years, we got together, moved to Kansas, where we live, in a bunker that belonged to my grandfather because he had some sort of secret society and when he died, he left the place for me and Sammy,” Dean finishes. “How did we meet Charlie?”

“She needed help to expose the company where I was working with as a lawyer and the three of us helped her, because our father taught us how to hack things, because when he was younger, he used to go from job to job and he taught us some things that were illegal, but he wanted us to know in case that someday we might need it,” Sam explains.

They keep going through every detail. Obviously, they shared them with Charlie, because she had told a few things about the three of them to Maggie and everything had to coincide.

Charlie promised them to go and visit them during Christmas with Maggie, so they still have a few days to work on the details and make sure that everything was correct.

 

_____

 

Dean is sitting on the bed, answering a text message from Charlie, before getting in their bed. Castiel is already lying on it, and when Dean switches off the phone and moves to get under the covers, he notices Castiel’s concerned face.

“What’s wrong?” Dean asks.

“I don’t like lying about our story,” Castiel answers.

“Neither do I, but we can’t tell her that we met because I sold my sold to resurrect my brother and I was sent to Hell a year later and you rescued me.”

“I know.”

Dean rolls onto his side and rests his elbow on the pillow, resting his cheek on his palm. “Are you mad at me?”

Castiel frowns, confused. “No, of course not, Dean. I understand that we have to lie, but—” He takes a deep breath. “I don’t like lying.”

Dean gets his left hand on Castiel’s chest and caresses it, feeling his warmth even if he is wearing a thick t-shirt, trying to comfort him. Castiel grabs his hand and they intertwine their fingers. The ex-angel looks at their joined hands, and so does Dean.

“Tell me something about you that I don’t know yet,” Castiel requests, looking at Dean, who looks at him surprised; he wasn’t expecting that. “I want to know you better.”

Dean chuckles. “You know me better than anyone, Cas. Better than myself, even.”

Castiel smiles. “Still, I’m sure there are a few things I don’t know about you.”

Dean makes a thoughtful face, trying to recall something that he hasn’t told Castiel yet or something he doesn’t know about him yet. “I enjoy dipping French fries in soft ice cream.”

Castiel gives him an incredulous look at smiles. “That sounds gross.”

Dean chuckles and feels how his cheeks heat up with his blush. “Yeah, but it tastes really good. You should try it.” He gives him a charming smile and Castiel grins. “Okay, tell me something about you that I don’t know.”

“Sometimes I count my steps when I’m walking.”

“What? Are you serious?”

Castiel nods.

“That’s fucking crazy,” Dean laughs.

“It is relaxing, sometimes.”

Dean makes a face. “You’re weird.”

“Says the one who mixes French fries with soft ice cream.”

Dean laughs and kisses him, softly, both of them humming into it. He gets on top of him and they keep kissing, taking their time as they kiss and touch, not wanting to take things further. Until they both get lazy and just smile and look at each other.

“Should we switch off the lights and sleep?” Dean asks. “It’s getting late.”

“Okay,” Castiel says, pecking Dean’s lips. He stretches his hand and turns off the lights. Dean remains on top of Cas, who places his arms around Dean and presses him closer. “Goodnight, Dean.”

“Goodnight, Cas.”

 

_____

 

“Hi, bitches!” Charlie exclaims as she comes out of her yellow car.

Dean grins as he sees his best friend approaching the front porch. She almost runs to them and hugs Sam first, while Maggie follows her, looking shy. They only saw her on photos, but in real life she is even prettier. Her skin is black, with a curly hair and big light brown eyes. She looks at them with a pretty smile, but Dean can see in her that she feels nervous. Charlie must have told her that the three of them are like her big brothers, so she must want to cause a first good impression; Dean wants to give Maggie a good impression too.

“Hey, Charlie,” Dean greets as he hugs her tightly. She has been gone for a bit less than a month, but Dean has missed her so much. “It’s good to have you back.”

Charlie smiles at him. “It’s good to be back, Dean.”

Then she proceeds to hug Castiel, who greets her with a big grin and also says how happy is to see her again.

“Don’t be shy, Maggie!” Charlie says with heart eyes. Maggie steps next to her and Charlie places her arm around her shoulders. “Guys, this is Maggie, Maggie, these are Sam, Dean and Castiel.”

“Hi,” Maggie says, waving her hand.

“Hey, Maggie,” Sam and Dean say, while Castiel says, “Hello, Maggie.”

“Let’s get inside, I don’t think any of us wants to stay out here freezing,” Dean offers with a charming smile.

They help Charlie and Maggie with their luggage and bring it to their bedroom before they go to the living room and begin to talk. At first, Maggie is a bit shy, but the three Winchesters try to be as inclusive as possible, and she ends up being really friendly and her shyness is soon fading away.

Naturally, she asks them about some things about their lives, and obviously, they lie. It isn’t the greatest thing, but nothing about their lives has ever been normal. Even one of them is billions years old and used to be a celestial wavelength that Dean used to compare with starts and galaxies.

They spend the afternoon chatting, getting to know each other better, and Dean doesn’t miss the way Charlie and Maggie look at each other. It reminds him of him and Castiel on their earlier days. They weren’t together yet, but they looked at each other like that; they were so oblivious.

“I’m gonna start making some burgers for dinner,” Dean states as he stands up. “Maggie, how do you like burgers?”

“Done, with tons of ketchup, cheese and lettuce,” Maggie answers.

“Got it.”

“Let me help you,” Castiel says, standing up.

“Maggie, you’re about to taste the best burgers, ever!” Charlie says with an excited voice.

Maggie rolls her eyes at Charlie but she smiles at Dean. “During the whole ride, she kept telling me how amazing your food is.”

“She didn’t exaggerate,” Sam and Castiel say at the same time, making Dean blush and smile.

“Maggie, you should come more often because these fuckers barely say anything good about me,” Dean says with a teasing grin.

“That’s not true!” Sam protests, quite annoyed.

Castiel frowns. “I always say good things about you.”

Dean kisses him. “Always so literal, babe.” Then, he rolls his eyes and chuckles.

As he chuckles, he goes to the kitchen, followed by Castiel, while Sam, Charlie and Maggie fall into an easy conversation. Dean and Castiel begin to grab everything they need for their dinner. Castiel mostly helps with slicing the tomatoes and peeling the potatoes for the French fries, but he also helps with the stove, given that he has improved his cooking skills, although Dean is still the best chef in the house.

“You did a great job,” Dean murmurs as he spices the mince. “About y’know— telling our story.”

Castiel nods. “I’m glad we don’t have to tell more lies.” He is silent for a while, concentrated on peeling the last potato. “Would you have liked us to meet like that?”

Dean stops what he is doing and gives Cas a confused look. “No. Why do you ask me that? I know meeting in Hell isn’t exactly the best of stories, but apart from that, I really love our story, even if it took us years to finally be together.”

“I was just curious,” Castiel simply says. Then, he smiles. “I love our story, too.”

“Sap.” He smiles and kisses his temple.

They keep making dinner. Sometimes, they join the conversation happening in the living room, but they never stop their tasks. Soon, the kitchen and the living room are filled with the glorious smell of French fries and burgers, making everyone feel how their mouths begin to water. Dean grins at the anticipation all of them are feeling because of the food.

Maggie is the first one to taste the burger, being watched by the rest, who are waiting for her reaction and verdict. She grins. “Yep, this is the best burger ever.”

Dean grins.

 

_____

 

Dean is in bed, with Castiel sleeping next to him, but Dean isn’t sleeping. He is looking at the ceiling. He can’t see much, given that it is a really dark night and there’s a new moon on the sky. Still, he looks at it, hoping his brain will shut up and stop overthinking about stuff he thought he was over with. 

“I can hear you thinking,” Castiel mumbles against Dean’s neck.

“That’s impossible. You can’t do that.”

“It is one of my special secret skills.”

“One of your—?” He laughs, because Cas has a dry humor and he loves it.

Castiel pulls his face away from Dean’s neck and rolls onto his back, switching on the lamp of his bedside table. Both of them squeeze their eyes shut at the light. It’s not too bright, but it takes their eyes some time to adjust from darkness to light.

The ex-angel rolls onto his side, and looks at Dean, bringing his hand to his sandy hair, caressing it while his eyes examine his face. “What’s wrong?”

Dean sighs and rubs his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose before resting his hand on the mattress. “I was overthinking about the same old shit.”

“What same old shit?”

Dean turns his face and looks at Castiel, whose other hand comes to rest onto Dean’s chest and Dean immediately grabs his hand, lacing their fingers. “I was thinking about how you used to be a celestial wavelength who could have anything he wanted by just—” He snaps his fingers instead of expressing the action with words. “And I’m just a man with nothing to offer to you, just a last name and a bed to share, and I was thinking how we ended up together.” He looks at Castiel, who is about to answer him, but Dean says, “Yeah, because you love me, I know that.”

“Yes, I love you, Dean. I love you so much. I loved you way before I knew what love was. You know this, I have told you this countless times. This isn’t the first time we have this conversation.”

“I told you I was overthinking the same old shit. My mind’s like that sometimes.” He takes a deep breath and looks at their joined hands, which happen to be their right hands, the ones with the rings. “You didn’t even let me finish my proposal of marriage. You immediately said yes. And all I could give you was my last name.”

“Your last name isn’t the only thing you have given me, Dean,” Castiel says with an obvious tone that makes Dean turn his face to look at him. “You have given me love, more love than anyone else. You have given me a reason to live even when I felt suicidal. You have given me a family and a sense of belonging. You have given me support every time I have needed it. You give me more than you realize, Dean.” He leans and kisses his lips, softly, almost chastely, but still an amazing kiss. “I hope I have been able to give you all of that as well.”

Dean arches his brow, sassily. “Cas, how can you doubt that?”

“You thought you didn’t give me that.”

Dean chuckles, bitterly. “Fair point.”

“Why do you still worry about us? We’ve been through a lot, and we still choose each other and we are still together.”

“I don’t know, Cas. Sometimes some shit comes into my head and it just—” He puffs and rubs his eyes. “I don’t know.” He takes a deep breath and stays quiet for a little while. “Sometimes I feel like I’m not enough for you.”

“You are more than enough, Dean.” He moves his hand to cup Dean’s face so they can look at each other. “You are more than enough, Dean.”

Dean kisses him, desperate, and fists the front of Castiel’s Henley’s t-shirt. “I love you, I love you so fucking much, Cas.”

“I know, Dean, I know.” He kisses him again, briefly. “And I love you so much, too.”

Dean gets his arms around Cas and pulls him into a hug that Castiel immediately returns. “I’m sorry I’m such an emotional mess.”

“There’s no need to apologize about that, beloved.”

Dean sighs, shakily, because he still can’t believe he is married to Cas, someone who understands him and takes care of him and doesn’t even get mad at him for being such a mess. “What would I do without you?”

“You would bury your feelings and drown them in alcohol and sex.”

Dean chuckles, bitterly. “Always so literal.”

Castiel cups his face and looks at him. “It is my poor attempt at making you smile.” He kisses his forehead and Dean closes his eyes, sighing. “I’m not really good at that.”

Dean smiles. “You’re actually pretty good.” He caresses Castiel’s jaw, feeling his stubble on his knuckles. “Better than you think.” His fingers brush Castiel’s lips and the ex-angel kisses them. He grabs Dean’s hand and kisses his palm, and Dean can’t help blushing. “You’re also really good at making me blush.”

Castiel smiles, in that beautiful way that makes Dean’s heart skip a bit. “That’s one of my favorite special skills.”

Dean laughs. “You’re such an idiot.”

“And you are such an assbutt.”

Dean grins.

“That’s the smile I love,” Castiel says before kissing him, and Dean hums, happily. “You should smile more, Dean. You have a beautiful smile.”

“Shut up, you big old sap.”

Castiel grins, too.

“Let’s sleep, alright? Tomorrow I’ve gotta make Christmas’ dinner.”

“Okay, Dean,” Castiel says before kissing Dean and switching off the lamp.

 

_____

 

Dean is surprised to find Castiel quite awake and not being grumpy. He is still sleepy and lazy, but he isn’t Mister Grumpy this morning.

“Did you sneak to the kitchen while I was asleep and got yourself some coffee?” Dean asks as he nuzzles Castiel’s neck and presses a few kisses.

Castiel sighs, contently. He still has his eyes closed. “No, I didn’t,” he answers as he gets his hand on Dean’s hair. “Today is one of those rare days when I’m almost a morning person.”

Dean chuckles and places himself on top of Castiel, who opens his eyes to look at him. “Good morning, sunshine.” He kisses him, softly and slowly, taking his time to taste Castiel’s lips and mouth. When they pull away, both of them are smiling. “Ready to leave bed?”

Castiel glares him. “Why do you always want to leave bed?”

“I was just teasing you, you dumbass.” He smirks and he presses a kiss on the tip of Castiel’s nose. “You know I’m a sucker for being in bed with you.” He sits up, with Castiel’s body in between his legs, and Castiel places his hands on Dean’s hips, his thumbs caressing the dip of them, hidden under his clothing. “Your hair is a complete mess.”

“When isn’t it?”

Dean chuckles. He looks at Castiel’s body and smiles. He slides away from him and settles in between Castiel’s legs and begins to kiss the inner of his thick thighs, where his boxers don’t cover. Castiel lets out of soft moan mixed with a happy sigh. Dean loves his husband’s thighs and tries to touch them and kiss them as much as possible.

He keeps kissing his tanned skin for a while, loving the soft mumbles of his name that escape Castiel’s mouth and how his husband caresses his hair, softly. When he is done with the kissing, he rests his cheek on Castiel’s leg and looks up at him. Castiel smiles and keeps stroking his hair, soothingly while Dean’s hand caresses Castiel’s other thigh.

“Are you still thinking about last night?” Castiel asks.

Dean shakes his head. “No. I was thinking about staying here until my stomach begins to growl.” It makes Castiel smile. Dean kisses Castiel’s thigh. “My mind’s quiet about my shit right now.”

“I’m glad.” He smiles. “Come here.”

Dean grins and lies on top of Cas so they can kiss. They make out for a while, sharing soft kisses and soft touches, until Dean’s stomach complains and they decide to leave bed and get ready for the day.

 

_____

 

Charlie and Maggie leave the day after Christmas and Sam, Dean and Castiel decide to remain in the house for a few more days. It is always hard to leave that house behind.

Their Christmas dinner consisted on tons of food, great company, tons of laughs, many joyful moments and the exchange of gifts. Dean and Castiel ended their night in bed, making love. Sometimes Dean still can’t believe he gets to celebrate Christmas every year.

“Hey,” Sam says as he knocks on the garage, where Dean is checking the Impala’s engine. Nothing’s wrong with his baby, but Dean likes to have her in perfect conditions. The older Winchester looks up and sees that his brother is wearing a tracksuit. “I’m gonna go for a run.”

“Okay,” Dean says and gets back to his task at hand. “Cas isn’t joining you?” Both his brother and his husband love running and they usually like to run together.

“No. He said he didn’t feel like it when I asked him a while ago.” He grabs his phone and plugs the earphones. “He kind of looked a little down.”

Dean frowns and looks at Sam, feeling how his stomach clenches. “What makes you think that?” 

“He looked like it. But not too much. I don’t know.” He shrugs and then he looks at Dean, upset. “Did you guys argue?”

“No, we didn’t.” He closes the hood of the Impala and starts putting the tools where they belong. “He was fine this morning.” He was actually in a great mood, after he took his needed coffee, of course. Cas was smiling and kissing him. “I’m gonna go check on him.”

“Maybe it’s nothing,” Sam says, trying to relieve him.

“You’re far better than me at reading people’s feelings, Sammy.” He looks at his hands, stained with oil and washes them. “Try to come here by lunch,” Dean adds as he dries his hands. “The puff pastry with melted cheese and ham doesn’t taste the same when it’s cold.”

Sam chuckles. “Okay.”

He leaves as Dean closes the door that leads to the garage. He grabs his leather coat and heads outside the house. Cas told him he was going to work on the garden, and it is pretty cold outside, so even if he is in the garden, his leather coat is much needed.

The garden is empty, and Dean knows where Cas must be if he isn’t there. He walks through the forest until the trees begin to be scarce and the grass begins to blend with the sand. He hears the sounds of the waves crashing against the shore, harder and angrier than when it is summer. The wind blows, shaking the lapels of Dean’s clothes, and the green eyed man zips up his coat.

He sees Castiel in the distance, standing in front of the sea, watching it. He is wearing his trench coat, and it waves with the wind, just like his dark hair. The wind blows hard, almost shushing the sound of the sea. In some parts of the beach, it manages to blow some sand, but Cas knows the place, and he knows where to stand to avoid getting sand in his eyes.

“Hey,” Dean says as he approaches him, and Castiel turns his face to look at him, making Dean see the sadness in his eyes. Sam was right. He stops next to him and gets his arm around his shoulders, and Castiel makes a silent sob, which encourages Dean to hold him in his arms and Castiel buries his face in the crook of Dean’s neck as his hands fist the front of Dean’s leather jacket. “I’m here, Cas. I’m here.” He kisses the crown of his hair and holds him tighter, hating to see Cas like this. He doesn’t know why Cas is feeling like this, but Dean hates it and he tries his best to make him feel better. “I’m here, love. I’ve got you.”

Castiel doesn’t cry, but he shakes in Dean’s arms, trying to keep himself together. He closes his eyes and lets out silent wails. Dean sighs and leans his cheek onto Castiel’s head, feeling the strength of the wind that blows and hits against their bodies.

“What’s wrong, Cas?” Dean asks, rubbing Castiel’s back.

“I—” Castiel exhales and pulls his face away from Dean’s freckled neck to look at him. His eyes are glassy and sore. “I wanted to write in my journal about something, but I— I no longer remember it, and I know it was something important, but I just can’t remember it, and I— it just brought me down.”

“I’m sorry, Cas.”

Castiel sighs and looks down. “I don’t know why it matters too much. It’s just a memory. I knew this was going to happen. I don’t know why it’s affecting me so much.”

“It’s affecting you ‘cause it’s scary to forget a part of yourself.”

The ex-angel exhales and looks at Dean. “It could be worse.”

He cups Castiel’s cheek. “I know.”

Dean read the files. He knows that Cas is going to lose part of his angelic memories, but not as many and at the high speed as he would have if he had just took his grace instead of the transformation from grace to human soul he went through. But he is still going to forget stuff from his past.

“Hey,” Dean whispers and leans closer, only leaving a couple of inches in between their faces. His thumb caresses Castiel’s cheek, feeling his stubble. “I’m gonna be with you, for everything you need and more, okay?”

Castiel smiles, clearly touched. “I know.” He moves his face and kisses Dean’s palm, then he closes his eyes. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be.” He pulls him into another hug and kisses his forehead. “It’s gonna be hard and scary for you sometimes, but I’m gonna be with you.”

“I love you. I love you so much.”

Dean kisses him. “I love you, too, Cas.”

They remain hugging for a while, until Castiel feels better, and then, they sit on the sand and watch the sea, quietly, holding hands. Dean uses his free hand to unzip his jacket and gets his pack of cigarettes from his inside pocket and shows it to Cas, asking him without saying a word. Castiel nods.

“Sam will notice the smell,” Castiel says before Dean puts a cigarette in between his lips and lights it up.

“He can deal with it,” Dean says, careless. When he has lightened up Castiel’s cigarette, he lights his, putting his Zippo lighter and the pack of smokes back inside the pocket. “He noticed that something was going on with you.”

“He is good at reading people.” He takes a puff and exhales the smoke, watching how it is harder to spot it given to the grey sky that looks the same color as the smoke.

“He doesn’t know, does he?”

Castiel shakes his head. “Do you think I should tell him? He is my friend, after all. I don’t like hiding things to my friends.”

“That’s your choice, Cas. I know it’s not something you wanna talk about.” He takes a long puff and also watches how the smoke comes out until it disappears. “But he’ll probably notice eventually. He’s that nosy.” He smiles and Castiel chuckles.

They remain in silence for a little while, hearing the wind and the sea.

“You should get me some pot instead of cigarettes.”

Dean rolls his eyes. “Plant some in your garden, you dick.”

Castiel chuckles and then sighs before taking another puff. “I know I have forgotten some memories, and none of them have upset me like this one did. I don’t know why this one is bothering me this much. I can’t even remember anything about it, I only know that I forgot something.”

“Maybe that memory had some important significance to you.”

“Probably. I don’t know. But every significant memory that I have, belongs to when we first met to this present moment, and I still remember everything from that period of time.”

Dean sighs. “Maybe it was a memory about the first time you got your first garrison or something like that.”

Castiel turns his face and looks at him. “My first garrison.” He stares at Dean for a while, until he starts laughing and Dean looks at him with a confused face and a bit startled. Castiel moves until he sits on Dean’s lap, cups his face and kisses him. “That’s the memory, Dean!”

“Wait, seriously?” he asks, perplexed. He can’t believe he helped Castiel to remember it.

Castiel nods and smiles. “You are wonderful, Dean.” He kisses him again and then he stands. “I need to write about it before I forget it again.” He offers his hand and Dean grabs it, being helped to stand up. “Thank you so much, Dean.”

Dean blushes and rubs his neck, smiling. “It was just a lucky guess.”

Castiel gives him a sweet smile. “No, it wasn’t. You just know me that well.”

 

_____

 

“Pick one,” Dean says as he opens the glovebox, revealing tons of tapes.

“Please, Cas,” Sam begs from the backseat. They are heading back to the bunker after spending their Christmas in the house in California, and it is time for Cas to ride shotgun. “Nothing too loud.”

Dean grunts, displeased, and he starts the Impala. “Killjoy.”

“How about Queen?” Castiel says as he picks the tape.

“That’s good for me,” Sam says.

Castiel looks at Dean, waiting for his approval. It’s the softest music he has, and Dean really likes Queen. If he didn’t, he wouldn’t have a tape of them. “Go ahead, babe.”

Castiel gets the tape inside the cassette player and then he closes the glovebox, leaning onto the seat as Dean drives away from the house.

It’s a long drive back home, and Dean isn’t sure if they are going to stop by some motel or if they are going to take turns in driving. They really didn’t discuss the whole thing. He knows they will stop for gas and food, but that’s all. They always make it up as they go. He guesses that Sam or Cas will say something about stopping by somewhere to get some rest or stop by and change the driver.

Dean used to drive for hours and sleep in the Impala while Sam drove and then wake up to drive some more, but now, he is over forty, and his eyesight isn’t what it used to be and his eyes get tired quicker than before. Not to mention that his body aches every time he sleeps in the car, especially his back and neck.

Dean looks at Castiel, who has his temple resting on the window, looking at the road absently. He reaches Castiel’s thigh and gives it a soft squeeze, making the fallen angel lift the corner of his mouth in an almost smile.

“You okay?” Dean asks, worried. He knows leaving California is always hard for Cas.

Castiel nods and looks at Dean’s eyes. “Yeah.” He grabs Dean’s hand and kisses the back of it, making Dean blush. Castiel smiles at that.

A raindrop falls onto the windshield of the Impala and Dean looks at it, watching how it traces the glass down. A few moments later, it starts to rain, the raindrops drumming the Impala, adding a strange beat rhythm to the songs they are listening to.

Sam chuckles in the backseat. “I remember when we were driving somewhere with dad and it started raining. We always picked a raindrop to see which one was gonna be the first one to reach the bottom of the window.”

Dean hums. “Yeah, we always got so excited and yelled to the raindrop to go faster. As if that was gonna work.”

“Dad hated it so much.”

“Did he ever like anything we did?”

Sam snorts. “Probably not.”

“Why would you play a game like that?” Castiel asked, frowning.

“We didn’t have anything else, Cas,” Dean answers, sadly.

Sam hums in agreement. “It was fun. And it also made the drive shorter. I think all kids do that at one point.”

Castiel nods. “What other games did you play in the car?”

“I spy, the theme song game, road trip bingo, license plate game, twenty questions… Other times we just read books or comics.”

“I didn’t know there were so many different games that could be played in a car.”

Dean shrugs. “There are more, but we didn’t know about’em. We spent tons of hours here ‘til we found a motel to crash, so we had to kill a lot of time. We tried to be low about it ‘cause dad always complained about not being able to listen to his music.” He tightens his jaw, remembering his childhood, if he can call it like that. Castiel notices it and reaches Dean’s hand giving it a tender and reassuring squeeze that Dean appreciates. “He also didn’t like us playing those games because it wasn’t gonna take us anywhere or be useful when hunting.”

Sam takes a deep breath. “Such a great parent…”

Dean would have protested against Sam’s words a long time ago, but Dean has grown a lot and has realized that John Winchester was a terrible father. “Yeah.” He makes a bitter laugh. “He would’ve killed me if he found out I was married to a man.”

“I would have beaten the shit out of him if he dared to think any less of you for being married to me,” Castiel says with determination.

Sam laughs, and so does Dean, and Castiel smiles, happily.

“I love it when you get so defensive about us,” Dean confesses, feeling happy all of sudden.

“Always, beloved.”

Dean blushes.

“You know,” Sam begins to say, leaning on the front seat to look at Dean. “I’m glad that you’re finally who you truly are and not trying to fulfill dad’s expectations.”

Dean sighs. “Yeah. It wasn’t easy to start accepting myself.” He looks at Cas, who notices his stare, and Dean smiles. “Cas has helped me a lot on that.”

Sam smirks. “You’re a sap.”

“It’s all his fault.” He moves his head, pointing at his husband.

Castiel rolls his eyes. “Don’t blame me. You have always been a sap.”

“No, I haven’t.”

Castiel give him a ‘done’ look.

“Shut up, Cas.”

“I didn’t say anything.”

“Not with words. But you did with your eyes.”

Castiel rolls his eyes.

“You’re doing it again.”

“I want to divorce you, Dean.”

Dean smirks. “You’re such a terrible liar, babe.”

Castiel smiles and he kisses Dean’s cheek. “You are an assbutt, beloved.”

“Yeah. I know.”

“You two are so cloying,” Sam protests with an amused grin.

Castiel and Dean glare him and say at the same time, “Shut up, Sam.”

The three of them laugh as _Don’t Stop me Now_ plays in the Impala.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading, for the comments, the kudos, the bookmarks and the subscriptions :)

“Did you tell him to come by eight p.m.?” Sam asks, looking at Dean.

Dean exhales exasperated and looks from his burger to his glare his brother. “Yes, Sammy, I did. Not everyone is as punctual as you are.”

Sam rolls his eyes and gives Dean his brand own bitch face.

Dean looks at the clock hanging on the furthest wall of the cafeteria they are. Robert, some hunter they have known for over a decade, contacted them to help him with a pack of werewolves he found in Clarksville, Tennessee. He contacted Dean on the phone, and he, Sam and Castiel drove all the way to Clarksville to meet the hunter.

As they wait for him, the three of them are eating their dinner, which consists on burgers for the three of them. Castiel gives Dean the onions of his, because Dean loves his burgers with extra onions, while Castiel doesn’t really like raw onions. He loves them when they are cooked, but not raw, because he finds the taste too intense.

“You’re a rabbit food lover,” Dean says as Castiel gives him the last of his onion. “How can you not like onions? You’re a shame to all the rabbit food lovers!”

Castiel rolls his eyes and glares him, making Dean grin.

The door of the cafeteria opens, revealing Robert, who spots the three of them and walks towards them. “Good to see you, folks,” he says as he sits on the empty chair, next to Sam. He sees Cas and offers his hand. “Hi, I’m Robert.”

“Castiel.” He wipes his hand on the napkin before giving Robert’s hand a shake.

“Found anything new about the werewolves?” Dean says before swallowing the food.

Robert shakes his head. He is older than Dean, and he has salt and pepper hair and a beard that matches it. The last time they saw him all his hair was completely black. “All I know is that everything points to four of ‘em, ‘cause all the witness I’ve talked to have described four different types of weird wolves. All the victims have missing hearts, and the biting marks are different, but I’ve managed to spot four different types of bitings. But I still don’t know where they are.”

“Have you checked the cameras around where the victims were found?” Sam asks.

“No. I don’t know how to use a damn computer. That’s the other reason of why I called you. I’ve tried to get some copies, but I need to fulfill a fucking sheet of some type of bullshit.”

Sam chuckles. “Don’t worry, I’ll take care of that once we’re in the motel.”

“Good.” He nods and then looks at Dean, specifically at his right hand. “I’ll be damned.” He laughs and Dean frowns. Robert points at Dean’s ring. “Dean Winchester got married?”

Dean looks at his fingers and nods. “Yeah, I did.”

Robert and the Winchesters worked on a couple of cases together, and in all of them, Dean managed to spend one night in every case, with a beautiful girl. But Dean is also aware of the reputation he gained about liking one night stands and hating compromises. It’s no surprise to see how hunters who know him are surprised or even shocked to find out that he finally decided to settle down with someone. His twenty year old self would have been shocked as well.

“Must be a hell of a woman if she managed to convince you to get married,” Robert says, still laughing, amused by the whole thing.

“He is a hell of a man,” Dean says, looking at Castiel, who smiles.

Robert’s face goes pale and he looks at the two of them with a disgusted expression. It’s a sight Dean has seen too many times, unfortunately, and it makes his stomach twitch in rage.

“You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me. You two are married?”

Castiel glares him, deadly. “You have a problem with that?”

Robert makes a disgusted grimace and then looks at Dean, who feels how his rage is filling his blood and spreading through his body. “You’re a fucking faggot,” he murmurs.

Without thinking it twice, Dean stands up and punches Robert, making the whole cafeteria fall in silent the moment Robert hits the floor. The cafeteria’s crew watches in silence, wondering what’s going on or if they should call the police, but they remain in silence, watching the scene.

“Call me or my husband that again and I’ll kill you,” Dean mutters, looking defiant.

Robert stands up, touching his bleeding nose and glares the three of them. “Then, I guess I should call you cocksucker.”

Dean tightens his jaw and glares him, fisting his hands. Castiel is about to punch Robert, but Dean stops him. He wants to punch him again, too, because he is insulting him and Cas, but Dean doesn’t want to bring even more attention to them, and Castiel seems to notice that, so he doesn’t fight against Dean’s grip

“Get the fuck out of here,” Dean says.

Robert uses the back of his hand to wipe his blood. “Or what?”

“Or you won’t be able to live without a wheelchair for the rest of your life,” Castiel says with a deadly voice, looking fierce.

Robert chuckles and then looks at Sam, who also is glaring him and says, “I think you should better get the fuck out of here.”

“What about the case?” Robert asks, annoyed.

“We’ll deal with it,” Dean says. “Now, get the fuck out of our sight.”

Robert huffs in disbelief. “I can’t believe you’re a fucking homosexual.”

“I’m bisexual, you douchebag,” Dean says, proud. “Now, leave and fuck off.”

Dean, Castiel and Sam glare Robert, who grunts and turns around, leaving the cafeteria. Dean and Castiel sit down when the hunter disappears behind the door.

“Unbelievable,” Dean mutters as he rubs his face. Castiel grabs his hand and looks at his knuckles. “I’m fine, Cas.”

“Just checking,” Castiel murmurs as he caresses Dean’s hand.

“I’m gonna talk to the staff to explain what happened,” Sam offers as he sets his plate aside. “You good?”

“Yeah,” Dean answers. “Not the first time somebody reacts like that about this.”

Sam makes a sad grimace. “I know. I’m not a huge fan of you punching guys, but he deserved it.”

Dean chuckles. “Thanks, Sammy.”

Sam nods and claps Dean’s shoulder with encouragement. Then he stands up and walks to the person in charge to talk about what happened.

“I wanted to punch him, too,” Castiel says.

“I know,” Dean says. They had a case a year ago and some guy saw that they were together and started to insult them and Castiel punched him so hard that he broke his nose. The guy was kicked out of the bar and the rest of the people in the bar were really nice to both Dean and Castiel. “It’s the twenty first century, for fuck’s sake. I can’t believe there are still people with his mentality.”

Castiel sighs. “Unfortunately there are.”

 

_____

 

Dean can’t sleep. His mind is still replaying the words Robert said and the words many other people have told him after finding out he was bisexual or that he was with Cas. He shouldn’t give a fuck, he actually doesn’t, but his mind is still replaying all those times and all those words.

He looks at Cas, sleeping next to him. They are holding each other; they always do when they sleep; their bodies always end up tangled.

Dean kisses his forehead and carefully leaves the motel bed they are sharing, trying not to wake his husband or his brother, who is sleeping in the other bed.

The windows let some blueish light to get inside, and it is more than enough to allow Dean to see where his pants, boots and leather jacket are. Once he is dressed, he leaves the room and opens the backseat’s door of the Impala and grabs a beer. He sits on the trunk and takes a sip of his beer before lighting up a cigarette.

The night is quiet and chilly. The motel they are staying in has its rooms looking at the other side of the road, and it is covered by a brick wall that separates them from a park. Dean takes a long puff of his cigarette, seeing how the wind carries the smoke under the lights of the streetlight.

He hears the door of their room being opened and Dean turns his face, seeing Castiel coming out of the room, wearing his trench coat.

“I woke you up, didn’t I?” Dean asks as Castiel approaches him.

Castiel nods and sits next to him, and the Impala sinks a little more under his weight. “I always notice when the bed is getting cold because you left,” Castiel answers. “Smoking and drinking,” he states, looking at Dean, who makes a guilty grimace. “Did his words bother you that much?”

“A little. But I’m also thinking about all the times people have told me the same thing.” He offers his beer and Castiel shakes his head, so Dean drinks the remaining of the can and tosses it away. “Back when I was a teenager, I started to realize I liked boys too, but thought it was a bad thing ‘cause my dad made me think that, and it was hard for me to come to terms with the whole thing of being bisexual. Even the first times I was with a guy, I felt ashamed about how much I liked it. I liked it as much as I liked being with girls. And I felt bad about it because I was raised to believe that. It took me so long to realize there wasn’t anything bad about it. And I’m more than okay with being bisexual. Hell, I love being with you, and I love the fact that I love you and that you love me, it’s fucking awesome, I don’t feel ashamed about any of that. And I hate it when people say that being bisexual or that being in love with you is bad and disgusting. I can’t take it. And it hits me hard ‘cause you’re the best thing that’s ever happened in my life and these people try to twist things to make me feel bad about loving you, and I fucking hate it.”

He takes a long puff of his cigarette, frustrated with society and the world and then he exhales, tiredly.

“You humans tend to hate what you don’t know or understand, and what’s different,” Castiel says. Dean nods in agreement. “I was taught as an angel that humans were weaker and imperfect, and that emotions lead to disobedience and that they were a weakness. I believed that was the case for millions of years. But then I met you, and I leant the truth and realized that emotions only made me stronger.” He looks up at the sky, watching some of the stars in the night sky. “Other angels told me that I felt too much, that I was too human, they said that before we met, they told me that it was something to be ashamed of, but they were wrong. And you helped me to not be ashamed by it.” He tilts his head down and looks at Dean.

Dean chuckles. “Look at us. The two of us being rebels and living in a way that was considered something shameful or disgusting for the ones that were around us.”

Castiel smiles. “I don’t regret any of it.”

“Me neither.” He smokes the last of his cigarette and then throws it to the ground, using the sole of his boot to extinguish it.

Castiel stands up and Dean does the same. Castiel hasn’t taken two steps when Dean grabs his arm and presses him against the door of the backseat and kisses him as he cups his face, and Castiel melts into the kiss, his hand immediately coming to Dean’s nape as he deepens the kiss.

As they kiss, Dean moves his hands until he finds the fly of Castiel’s pants and unzips them, making Castiel pull away from the kiss. “What are you doing?” he asks, looking at Dean with a frown.

“I’m gonna suck your cock,” Dean answers before giving him a fervent kiss, the kind of kiss that makes Castiel’s legs tremble. “I’m a cocksucker, after all,” he adds, smirking. He knows that Robert said the word in disgust, but Dean doesn’t give a fuck. He loves Castiel’s cock and he loves blowing him. “And you know I love sucking your cock.”

“Dean, we’re in public,” Castiel says with an obvious look.

“Do you see anyone around here?” He arches his brow. “It’s two a.m., everyone’s sleeping and we’re alone.” He kisses Castiel, deeply, loving how Castiel moans into it. He manages to pull down Castiel’s pants and then he sneaks his hands under the elastic band of his boxers. “Just try to be quiet,” he adds with a smirk.

Castiel lets out a shaky breath as Dean kneels in front of him, in the space left between the Impala and the other car parked next to it. “That’s going to be difficult.”

Dean pulls down Castiel’s boxers and wraps his lips around his half hard cock, moaning at the feeling of Castiel’s cock under his tongue.

“Dean—” Castiel moans, getting both of his hands on Dean’s hair and tilting his head down to look at Dean, who also looks at Castiel as he takes all his length in his mouth.

Dean moans around Cas’ cock when he feels the head pressing against his throat. He closes his eyes, enjoying the weight and taste of it, nuzzling the dark curls of his hair. He feels Cas’ thumbs stroking his cheeks and Dean opens his eyes, looking up to meet Castiel’s eyes, finding a stare full of love, a stare only Cas has ever given him.

He begins to bob his head, swirling his tongue along the shaft with every movement, hollowing his cheeks when he takes all of Cas’ cock in his mouth, until he has it against his throat, moaning around it, doing the things he knows Cas loves. It earns him so many wonderful moans and some tiny whimpers that Castiel tries to keep as low as possible, but he isn’t doing a great job at that. Dean can’t judge him.

Dean’s hands rest on the dip of Castiel’s hips, his thumbs making soothing circles on the warm skin as he blows him. He loves giving head to Cas. He loves the feeling of Castiel’s cock in his mouth, how thick and heavy he feels, how he tastes like skin and soap, and how Cas sounds with everything Dean makes. But he also loves the way Cas looks at him.

When Cas hasn’t his eyes closed, he tries to look at Dean, who sometimes looks up, to see Castiel’s blissed face, and sometimes he finds him with his eyes open, looking at Dean with so much love and devotion, and it makes Dean’s chest flutter.

He has blown some dudes in his life, and all of them were rough, and even if Dean sometimes enjoys the roughness in sex, Cas is always showing his love to him, even when they are in the mood for something rougher than their usual love making. And that’s something Dean loves so much, because nobody has ever loved him the way Cas does. Nobody has ever given him as much as Castiel gives him. Dean always gave, and never got anything back, not that he expected it, he just loves giving, but Castiel always gives him, and that is something incredible.

He knows that Castiel’s orgasm is about to come when Castiel begins to say enochian words and how he loses the rhythm of his hips. He tightens his grip on Dean’s hair, and Dean knows that Cas won’t last more than two seconds, so he swallows him completely, hollowing his cheeks and moans the moment he feels Cas’ come filling his mouth.

Castiel comes with Dean’s name, lower than usual, but it still sounds perfect and holy coming from his lips. Dean moans around his cock, swallowing his come, working him through his orgasm. He finally pulls away with a wet sound when he feels Cas is done, and presses a lingering kiss on the head of it, looking through his eyelashes at Cas, who is panting and blushed.

He pulls away and pulls up Castiel’s underwear and pants before they kiss, sweetly and passionately, moaning into each other’s mouth as their tongues swirl. Castiel gets his hands around Dean’s back and pulls him closer, feeling his hardness against his crotch. He gets his hands on Dean’s pants and begins to unzip them, making Dean pull away from the kiss and look at Castiel with an arched eyebrow.

“You aren’t the only one who loves sucking cock,” Castiel says with determination, and it makes Dean all tingly.

Before Dean can say anything, Castiel switches their positions, pressing Dean’s back against the Impala and kissing him hard and deep, pulling down Dean’s pants and underwear with easiness.

“Try to keep quiet,” Castiel says as he kneels in front of him.

Dean chuckles. “Asshole.”

He can’t help moaning when Castiel wraps his lips around his swollen cock. Immediately, he brings his hands to Castiel’s dark, messy hair, and tilts his head down, staring at Cas, who looks at his eyes too as he swallows him in one perfect movement that leaves Dean with his whole body surrendered to Cas.

The ex-angel stays pressed against Dean’s golden curls for a while, looking at Dean as he hollows his cheeks and tastes his cock with his tongue, moving it up and down his shaft. Dean can’t help moaning, but he tries to be quieter than usually, something difficult when Cas begins to move and give him such an amazing blowjob.

His mouth and tongue are warm and wet, and Dean loves it. Castiel does every little thing he knows that Dean loves. They know each other’s bodies so well and they know what each other enjoys and they put it on practice.

Dean closes his eyes, making silent moans and rolling his hips. He caresses Cas’ cheek and Castiel moans around his cock. He uses his tongue and changes the angle a little, and Dean can’t remain quiet.

It doesn’t take too long for his orgasm to start building. He knows that Cas is aware of it. Dean always loses his rhythm and becomes desperate as his breathing begins to change. Castiel increases his speed and hollows his cheek, burying his face in Dean’s groin and Dean falls apart, coming in Castiel’s mouth, moaning his name and digging his nails in his scalp, feeling how Castiel swallows his come and how he moans around his cock all the time.

Castiel pulls away slowly, lingering on the head before pressing a gentle kiss. He pulls up Dean’s clothes and kisses him, the two of them smiling into it and holding each other.

They pull away, desperate for air, but they kiss again, tenderly but passionately.

“I love you so fucking much,” Dean says, happily as they kiss again.

Castiel smiles against his lips. “I love you so fucking much, too.”

Dean grins. “Love it when you curse.”

“Of course you do.” He cups Dean’s face and his thumb caresses his cheekbone. “Are you okay?”

“Of course I’m okay. I just came in your mouth.”

“Dean.”

Dean huffs and pecks his lips. “Yeah, Cas. I’m good. You always know how to make me feel better.” He kisses him again, humming into those lips he loves. “I’ve got the best husband ever.”

“I’m the one who has the best husband ever.”

Dean leans his forehead onto Castiel’s as he shakes his head, blushing and grinning. “You sappy dick.”

Castiel kisses him again. Dean chases him when he pulls away, needing to feel his lips against his again. He just loves kissing him.

“C’mon,” Castiel murmurs and grabs Dean’s hand, lacing their fingers. “Let’s go back to bed.”

“Okay.”

 

_____

 

Werewolves are never an easy hunt, especially when they have to hunt a whole pack, but they have been dealing with some of them for several years, so they have some experience, but they always end up with some scratches.

As they watch how the corpses of the werewolves burn in a hole the three of them dug up, Dean looks at his husband. Cas got a scratch on his abdomen, on the left side. His black t-shirt is torn by the claws and it also has his dried blood on it. Sam got a scratch on his right shoulder, and his jacket and shirt are in the same condition as Castiel’s t-shirt. Dean also got his scratch; his is above his left pectoral. Luckily, none of those scratches are too deep, but they are going to have to do something about it soon.

Castiel moves towards the trunk and Dean watches him. He grabs something and walks towards the front of the Impala, being now watched by the two Winchester brothers.

“We should heal while we are here,” Castiel says, putting the first aid kit on the hood of the Impala.

“Sam, you first,” Dean says.

Sam doesn’t say anything or roll his eyes. They are in the same conditions. None is worse than the other. His little brother walks towards Cas and sits on the hood of the Impala, sinking it a little with its weight.

Dean watches how Cas heals Sam, feeling the hotness of the flames of the fire on his nape, but he doesn’t mind it; it is a cold night. Cas is delicate and firm with his movements. Back before they met Cas, Sam and Dean had to heal each other, and sometimes they had to heal themselves. It wasn’t easy, and neither of them had the skills or the knowledge Cas has, but they did pretty well. But he is thankful that Cas has better healing skills than the two of them.

“Thanks, Cas,” Sam says with an appreciative smile.

“My pleasure,” Castiel says. Then, he looks at Dean, who knows that it is his turn, so he walks towards the Impala while Sam walks away. “Remove your clothes, Dean.”

Dean smirks and begins to take off his jacket, shirt and t-shirt. “Couldn’t you wait ‘til we got home?” he teases.

Castiel rolls his eyes, without saying anything. His eye roll says enough.

When Dean is topless, he sits on the hood and Castiel begins to heal him. He looks beautiful with the light of the fire. He can’t take his eyes off him, mesmerized by his beauty.

They don’t say a word as Castiel heals him. The only sound comes from the fire that’s cracking. It doesn’t take him too long to heal Dean, who pecks his lips as a thanking.

“C’mon, let me heal you now,” Dean says as he stands up and puts on his clothes. “Hopefully I won’t butcher you.”

“You won’t,” Castiel says, sitting on the hood. “Your healing skills are really impressive.”

Dean chuckles. “Thanks, Cas.”

He heals Cas, carefully, not wanting to hurt him. It takes him longer than Cas, but he does an amazing job, too. Castiel kisses his cheek when he is done and then Dean brings the first aid kit back to the trunk, grabbing three beers after it and handing one to Cas and the other to Sam.

They still have to wait for a little bit more to get back to the road.

 

_____

 

“What are you making?” Castiel asks as he presses his chest against Dean’s back and gets his hands on his stomach, pressing a sweet kiss on his neck.

“Pecan pie,” Dean answers, turning his face to meet Castiel’s eyes.

“Do you need some help?”

“No, I’m good, but thanks, babe.” He pecks his lips, feeling Castiel’s smile. The ex-angel pulls away, but he kisses Dean’s nape before doing that, and he walks towards where the kettle is. He makes a low grunt and Dean looks at him. “Your wound again?”

Castiel nods. “Yes. A lot of movements make the abdomen move and it stings.”

Castiel’s wound is healing perfectly, but he is sore. Dean understands him; in certain arm movements, his pectoral suffers too.

“We’re getting too old for this,” Dean mumbles.

“At least we are getting old.”

Dean smiles. “Yeah.”

Castiel puts the kettle filled with water on the stove and then he gets his mug, grabbing a bag of his tea. As he waits for the water to be ready, he reaches the small of Dean’s back and rubs soothing circles on it. Dean can’t help smiling.

Way before they got together, Dean craved Castiel’s touch. He craved this type of closure. It is amazing that he can have this anytime he wants it. He loves it.

He leans closer to Cas, resting his temple against his and sighs, contently. He stops what he is doing to get his arms around Cas, who immediately gets his around Dean, and they rest their foreheads together, without saying a word, just holding each other and looking into their eyes. It’s intimate, and both of them love it.

The moment ends when the kettle begins to protest with its scratchy noise and both of them look at it. Castiel makes an apologetic look and Dean chuckles. He gets back to putting the filling for the pie while Castiel pours the steaming water into his mug.

Castiel grabs his mug and kisses Dean’s nape. “I love you, Dean.”

Dean smiles and feels his eyes getting glassy. “I love you, too, Cas.”

Castiel kisses his nape once again. “I’m going to the library to read a little. If you need me for anything, I’ll be there.”

“Okay.”

He turns his face to look at Cas, who smiles at him, softly, and then he turns around, walking away from the kitchen while Dean watches him, with a smile on his face. When Cas disappears behind the wall, Dean continues finishing the pie.

Dean enjoys cooking, especially bakery. There is something really enjoyable about bakery. He also loves cooking all kinds of food outside bakery, but he has a weak spot for it. He knows he still has to learn a lot about the many different goodies bakery has, but he has learnt a lot.

It doesn’t take him too long to get the pie ready and put it in the oven. Once he closes its door, he begins to clean the kitchen and all the cooking utensils he used. It doesn’t take him too long, so he decides to go to the library and grab a book and sit next to Cas while the pie bakes.

Dean enjoys this homey routine they can enjoy most of their days. He wouldn’t mind it if all their days were like this.

 

_____

 

“Does it bother you if I write for a little while?” Castiel asks when Dean closes their bedroom door.

Usually they stay in the living room for long, watching something with Sam, but the three of them are still a little bit wasted from the last hunt. Lately, every time they come back from a hunt, they need more time to get better. Their bodies aren’t what they used to, and healing takes more time for them.

Dean kisses Cas’ temple, cupping his cheek with one hand. “Of course not, go ahead.”

Castiel smiles shyly and grabs his journal from the drawer before sitting on the chair in front of the desk.

“It’s okay if I play the guitar?” Dean asks, spotting his guitar next to the desk. “I don’t wanna deconcentrate you.”

Castiel looks at him with a bright smile. “You won’t. I think that hearing you playing the guitar will actually help me.”

Dean walks towards Castiel and gives him a curious look. “Really?”

Castiel nods. “We could try.”

“Alright. I’ll try to keep it low.” He kisses Castiel’s head and grabs the guitar, carrying it with him, until he sits on the edge of their bed, looking at Castiel’s back. “Anything you wanna hear me play?”

“I don’t have any preference, Dean. I enjoy everything I’ve heard you play so far.”

Dean blushes. “You flatterer.”

Castiel grins.

Dean thinks for a moment and he begins to play the chords of Simple Man. He even starts to sing with a low voice, watching how Cas keeps writing in his journal, with a beautiful smile on his face; he always loves hearing Dean playing the guitar and singing.

“You have a beautiful voice, Dean,” Castiel says when Dean has finished singing.

Dean chuckles and blushes. “Stop making me blush, Cas.”

He turns his face and looks at Dean. “Never.”

“You’re the worst.”

“I’m not as bad as you.”

“Dick.”

“Assbutt.”

Both of them chuckle.

Dean continues playing some songs he knows, singing to some of them. Other times he simply plays the music, making it up. Castiel smiles all the time and doesn’t stop writing until he is done, and when that happens, he stands up and walks to the bed, sitting next to Dean, and just watches him, with a beautiful and happy smile on his face.

“Did it actually help?” Dean asks after the last strumming.

“It did,” Castiel answers. He leans and kisses him, slowly and softly, and Dean sighs into it. “Thank you.”

“No problem, Cas.” He kisses him again, with the same affection as their previous kiss. “Think we should get some sleep?”

“Yes, we should.” He smiles.

Dean chuckles and steals a brief kiss before standing up and leaving the guitar on its place.

He and Castiel start to remove their clothes until they end up only with their underwear and t-shirts. They get in bed and Dean motions Cas to hold him from behind, because he feels like being the little spoon tonight.

Castiel grins and kisses Dean’s nape as his hands come to rest onto Dean’s stomach. “I like holding you like this.”

Dean shakes his head but chuckles. “Yeah, I know you do.” He gets his hands on top of Cas and grabs on to kiss his knuckles. “You’re such a sap.”

“You love it,” the ex-angel whispers into his ear.

Dean turns his face to look at him and grin at him. “Only in some occasions.”

“Liar.” He kisses his lips and then nuzzles his neck as he accommodates himself against Dean’s back. “Goodnight, Dean.”

Dean kisses Cas’ knuckles again before he places their hands onto his stomach. “Goodnight, Cas.”


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I intended on updating yesterday, but AO3 was down, so here's the update!

Dean slams the motel door. “What the fuck were you thinking?!”

Castiel glares him, deadly. He is as pissed off as Dean is. “I was saving you.”

“You put yourself at risk! It almost cost you your life!”

The two of them went to Virginia to investigate a possible case. Sam didn’t go with them because he had been throwing up the whole weekend and he wanted to remain at home. Dean and Castiel drove the whole way to Virginia and found that they were dealing with a manticore.

The manticore attacked the two of them, but it came a moment when it got directly to Dean. It was about to bite him when Castiel got in the way and its fangs ended up on Castiel’s neck, blood running down his skin quickly while Castiel handed Dean the knife and Dean stabbed the manticore in its neck, causing it to roar in pain before it pulled away and bleed itself to death.

The first thing they did after killing it was healing Castiel. Neither of them said a word about it. Dean was pissed off, and Castiel knew it. During the drive back to the motel, neither of them said a single word, until Dean closed the door and couldn’t keep shut anymore.

“You were in danger!” Castiel yells, angry, getting into Dean’s personal space. “What was I supposed to do?!”

“Anything else that didn’t involve you getting bitten in the fucking jugular! You can’t go around doing that kind of stuff, Cas! What if I lost you?! What then?! Do you realize how fucking insa—”

But Dean can’t finish his sentence because Cas smashes their mouths together and kisses him, hard and desperate, using his hand to fist Dean’s torn t-shirt and using the other to place it on his nape. Dean doesn’t fight back, he kisses him in the same way, but with frustration too, getting his hands on his hips.

It isn’t the first time they do this after one risks their life to save the other. It happens almost in every hunt, and they always end up arguing about it until the one who has risked his life, kisses the other, and they have sex. Dean knows that Cas wants to end the argument, because he doesn’t see anything wrong with what he has done, and this is the best way to get rid of the burning adrenaline and stamina they both have. Dean can’t blame him; he has done the same when he was in the other end of the situation.

They take off each other’s clothes with quick and eager movements, only pulling their mouths away when they have to take off their t-shirts. There is eagerness, frustration, desperation and anger in their movements, but they don’t hurt; they never hurt.

Dean pushes Castiel towards the bed and the two of them fall onto it, gracelessly, but they don’t give a damn. They are sweaty and bloody, especially Cas, who has a big bandage on his neck, and every time Dean feels it under his fingertips, he feels how his stomach sinks. Cas did something extremely risky and lost some blood. Dean was quick to kill the manticore thanks to the knife Castiel handed him, but Cas could have died from blood loss. Thinking about that makes him kiss Cas harder and more desperately.

Castiel doesn’t stop touching Dean’s body, caressing with his hands, rolling his hips desperately, seeking friction, making Dean thrust onto him to achieve that glorious feeling, deepening the kiss as he does so.

He stretches his hand and searches in the drawer of the bedside table for a condom and the lube. It takes him some attempts to get them. He could just stop kissing Cas and look for what he is aiming for, but he doesn’t want to do that. He is still pissed off about Castiel’s reckless behavior. He doesn’t want to talk; he wants to fuck.

Without breaking the kiss, Dean puts on the condom and spreads the lube on his hand and on his cock. As he does so, Castiel caresses his nipples, hardening them with his fingers as he sneaks his tongue inside Dean’s mouth, never letting his hands go of his freckled body.

Dean fingers him, opening him up, until he is loose enough, not brushing his prostate at all, although Castiel fucks into his fingers, trying to search that burn, but Dean is quick in pulling them away, which makes Castiel groan in the kiss.

Dean pulls his fingers away and wipes them on the sheets. Cas immediately brings his legs around Dean’s hips, embracing them and pulls Dean closer. Dean places his hands on Castiel’s hips and aligns himself before he pushes inside the wonderful warmth and tightness of Castiel, moaning at the feeling, pulling away from Cas’ swollen lips as he slides all the way in.

Castiel begins to pant, and when Dean is fully inside him, he keeps kissing Dean, hard and desperate, and Dean kisses back, moving his hands up, until they are on Castiel’s cheeks, and he begins to roll his hips, harder than usually, but both of them are pissed at each other and they want it rougher than what they are used to.

With every roll of Dean’s hips, Castiel meets him in between, fucking into Dean with desperation, moaning his name loudly, and Dean moans Castiel’s name, loud and filthy. The ex-angel grinds onto Dean, his limbs embracing Dean tighter, nailing his skin until the flesh turns white, and Dean increases his speed, fucking Cas with quick and hard thrusts, loving how he clenches around him every time he touches his prostrate.

Dean sneaks his hand under Castiel’s body, resting it on the small of his back to lift him a little bit more, giving him enough leverage to slide in and out of Cas with easiness and hitting that sweet spot with every thrust, driving the two of them insane.

Castiel buries his face in the crook of Dean’s neck, moaning his name and something in enochian, trembling under Dean’s body, and Dean knows he is close, so he lifts him a little bit more, making the angle perfect for the two of them, and Castiel comes, followed by Dean just a second later.

They stop moving only when the two of them are done with their releases. Dean lies Castiel back onto the mattress and Castiel stretches his sore legs onto the bed. They both are panting, exhausted from the whole thing.

Eventually, Dean moves and removes the condom, knotting it and walks to the bin to toss it.

“I’m still mad at you,” Dean mutters, watching how the condom gets inside the bin.

Castiel huffs, annoyed. “Stay mad all you want to, I didn’t do anything wrong.”

Dean turns around and looks at Castiel, who looks at Dean with an exasperated expression. “You could have died, Cas! How can you be so fucking reckless and risk your life like that?!”

Castiel sits on the bed and watches Dean with a glare. “You have done the same thing countless of times! So don’t try to lecture me about this! You have no right! I was saving you!”

“At the expense of your life!”

“And so have you done it in the past as well!”

“Well, you haven’t liked it either when I’m the one who risks his life for yours!”

“Because I can’t lose you!”

“And I can’t lose you either!”

They fall silent and look at each other, frustrated and angry, but also in pain. Dean feels his eyes getting glassy as he looks at Castiel’s bandage. He walks towards Cas and touches the wound, sighing shakily.

“You got bitten, Cas, you— Fuck.” Dean takes a deep breath and clenches his jaw. “It was deep, and there was so much blood.”

Castiel places his hand above Dean’s. “If the manticore had bitten you, it would have been deadly. But I knew that if I got in the way, the angle wasn’t going to be as precise as if it would be with you and I decided to take that risk to save you. And I don’t regret it.”

Dean huffs. “You should stop doing that kind of reckless things.”

“I will stop when you stop doing reckless things to save me.”

Dean rolls his eyes and then he rubs his face. He looks at Cas and then pulls away. “I’m gonna take a shower.”

“Can I join you?”

“Yeah.”

Castiel stands up and he and Dean walk towards the tiny bathroom. Castiel closes the door behind him while Dean sits on the edge of the bathtub and tries to figure out a way to get a nice temperature, but it seems that you either get Hoth or Mordor. He sighs, frustrated, and rubs his face with both hands.

“Hey,” Castiel says as he sits next to Dean, grabbing his hands and kissing them, and Dean can’t help to shed some tears. “I’m alive, Dean.”

“I know.” Dean laces their fingers and looks at Castiel, who looks really pale. “But that was a close call, and I— I was so fucking scared. I know you wanted to save me, and I’m grateful, I really am, but— what if things didn’t go right? I can’t— I—” He closes his eyes and sighs.

Castiel kisses his forehead, and Dean manages to see how his eyes are glassy too. “That’s how I feel when you risk your life to save mine.”

Dean chuckles. “We’re gonna end up like this in more occasions, aren’t we?”

“I’m afraid so, beloved.”

Dean nods. The burning water runs onto the bathtub, brushing their toes. Dean watches it before he leans onto Cas’ side and Castiel kisses the crown of his hair. “Promise me you won’t do that again.”

“I can’t promise you such thing, you know that. I will always try to protect you.”

Dean moves his head and brushes Castiel’s hair, getting some locks behind his ear. “Why do you have to be so stubborn?”

Castiel leans onto Dean’s touch. “I could ask you the same thing.” Both of them smile. “I know you can’t also promise me the same thing.”

“No, I can’t. I’ll always try to protect you, too. You’re so fucking important to me.”

Castiel smiles.

“I love you,” Dean says.

“I love you,” Castiel says and leans to kiss him. “Let me try to find a nice temperature for the both of us.”

“If anybody can do that, it’s you.”

Castiel ends up finding a perfect temperature and the two of them take a shower, sharing soft kisses and soft touches.

 

_____

 

Dean sings as he works on the Impala in the bunker’s garage. _Gallows Pole_ sounds in the quiet garage, echoing against the walls, and Dean doesn’t miss a single word, matching Robert Plant’s voice, although Dean’s voice is rougher than the Led Zeppelin’s singer. Singing to his favorite songs while he works on his dearest car, always makes the job better. He always enjoys working on his beloved car, but when he plays his favorite songs, his enjoyment increases.

He startles when he feels a hand on the small of his back, long fingers searching for skin, but relaxes immediately when he recognizes the warm touch of his husband, pressing against Dean’s side, looking at the way Dean is making his task.

“Hey, handsome,” Dean greets with a charming smile.

“Hello, Dean,” Castiel says, caressing Dean’s back. He pulls away his hand and shows his other hand, holding a beer. “I thought you might want one.”

Dean grins and moves from the hood of the Impala. He grabs Castiel’s forearm and pulls him into a sweet kiss. “You’re the best, babe.”

Castiel blushes, but smiles, handing Dean the bottle. He opens it easy and throws the cap onto the table where his toolbox is. He takes a long sip, realizing for the first time that his mouth has been feeling dry for a while.

“Do you have to fix anything?” Castiel asks, leaning on the wooden table, almost sitting on part of it.

Dean shakes his head. “Nah. Just checking everything. She’s doing pretty good.”

“That’s because you take good care of her.”

Dean smirks and walks until he is front of Castiel, who gets his hands on Dean’s hips. “I think the Impala was the first thing that made me realize that I don’t actually break everything I touch.” He sets his beer on the table and cups Castiel’s face, his thumb stroking his cheek. “That I could actually take care of something without fucking it up.”

“She’s still there. In one piece.” A beat later, he says, “So I am.”

Dean didn’t say anything about Castiel, but the ex-angel knew that Dean was implying Cas. “Yeah, you are.”

His other hand comes to rest on Castiel’s wound, still covered with a bandage. His eyes get glassy and he buries his face against the side of Cas’ face, breathing into him as they hold each other.

“I’m still alive, Dean.”

“I know.” And he is so fucking thankful for that, but the memories of Cas bleeding don’t go away. It has been only a couple of days since they returned from that hunt. He pulls away after a while and looks at those blue eyes he loves so much. “I’m just a bit shaken, that’s all.”

Castiel grabs Dean’s hands and kisses them, an action that always makes Dean blush. “I understand. I have been in your situation, too.”

Dean smiles, sadly. “Yeah. I’m aware.”

Castiel stands up from the table and wipes something on Dean’s cheek. “You always end up with oil stains on your face. I don’t know how you manage to do so.”

“It just happens, Cas.”

Castiel leans and kisses him, and Dean hums, his toes tingling at the feeling. “I’m going to go out and run for a while.”

“Okay. Come back before supper.”

“Of course. There’s no way I am ever going to miss supper when you are the one making it.”

Dean snorts. “You’re such an asshole.” He leans a kisses him.

Castiel gives his hand a soft squeeze and walks away. Dean takes another sip of his beer and leans onto the hood.

“Dean,” Castiel says.

Dean turns his face and looks at his husband, who is waiting by the stairs. “Yeah?”

“I am glad you are wearing them.”

Dean blushes, aware that Cas is mentioning the fact that he is wearing the pink panties. “You’re the one who made me stop feeling embarrassed about it.”

Castiel simply smiles and turns around.

 

_____

 

They are lying on their bed. Dean has his back against the mattress and the ex-angel lying on his side, pressed against Dean’s side. Castiel has his hand on Dean’s chest, palm flat above Dean’s heart, because he likes feeling the beating of his husband’s heart. Dean has one hand on top of Castiel’s hand while the other combs Castiel’s hair. They went to bed because they were tired, but none of them seems to be sleepy.

“I was thinking about something,” Castiel begins to say, and Dean knows that when Cas starts something with those five words, it can be anything. “When you place ice cubes on water, it’s like water cubes are floating on their blood.”

Dean snorts. “How do you even come up with that kind of stuff, Cas?”

Castiel shrugs. “I just think about some random stuff.” He looks at Dean’s eyes and smiles. “The human world has so many fascinating things. I have always found humans interesting.”

“That’s ‘cause angels are dicks.” He smirks and Castiel kicks him on the shin. It makes Dean chuckle. “You always get so defensive when I call them dicks.”

“I have to admit that angels have many defects, and that their actions have always been questionable, but even if I’m human now, being an angel is part of my story.”

“Yeah, I know.” He kisses his hairline and sighs. “But you never were like them.”

Castiel sighs. “They used to say I had too much heart, that I had a crack in my chassis, that I felt too much.”

“That’s what makes you so fucking awesome.”

Castiel smiles and nuzzles Dean’s neck before kissing it.

“Do you miss Heaven?” Dean asks, feeling a bit scared of the answer.

“No, I don’t,” Castiel answers. Dean immediately relaxes. “But once in a while I miss my tiny piece of Heaven.”

Dean frowns and looks at him. “Did you have a Heaven?”

Castiel nods. “Technically, it wasn’t mine. It was the Heaven of an autistic man who drowned in a bathtub in 1953. But I always came there when I didn’t have anywhere to go, or when I needed to just get away from everything. It was an eternal Tuesday afternoon, with a bright, blue sky and a beautiful park. That was my tiny piece of Heaven. Not fully mine, but I liked it.”

“Will you— will you get a Heaven now that you’re human?” Dean asks, and his voice trembles a little. He even tightens his grip on Castiel, afraid that he will go away, even if he isn’t going to.

“Yes. I read some of the Men of Letters’ files regarding the process of an angel grace turning into a human soul. Once I die, I will have a piece of Heaven, just like any other human soul.” He lifts his eyes and looks at Dean, squinting his eyes and frowning. “Why do you ask that?”

“Because I didn’t know. And I’m fucking relieved that you get to go to Heaven.” He lets out a breath he had been holding for so long. “Do you think we’ll get the same?” He had heard that some souls, soulmates to be more precise, get their own shared Heaven. Dean isn’t sure if they will end up in Heaven, but he would like to think that he would, and that Castiel will be there with him.

Castiel smiles. “Of course, Dean.” He leans and kisses him.

“Good.”

“I love you.”

Dean grins. “I love you, too.”

 

_____

 

“Fuck, Cas,” Dean moans against the pillow. “That’s the spot, oh fuck.”

“Dean, you sound like when we are having sexual intercourse,” Castiel says with a teasing smirk.

“How many times do I have to tell you to stop calling sex that?” He moans again, when Cas’ hand finds a knot on his back and massages it again. “Fuck, you’re too good at this. Why haven’t you done this to me before? It’s so fucking good.”

Castiel keeps massaging Dean’s naked back, finding those terrible knots on his back with an amazing accuracy, relaxing Dean in a way he has never felt before. “Probably because I have never heard you complain about your back as much as today.”

Dean hums. This morning, he woke up with a terrible back ache and he knew it was just his muscles suffering from too many things. Castiel offered to give him a massage, and Dean was hesitant at first, but right now, he thinks he is in Heaven.

“Where did you learn to give massages?” Dean asks, resting his cheek on the pillow to look at Cas.

“I learnt by watching humanity doing it.” He keeps looking at his hands, traveling on Dean’s freckled back, finding all his sore spots. He has a concentrated look, the one that indicates that this task is really serious for him, and Dean finds it adorable.

Dean sighs, happily, and closes his eyes, letting out a couple of moans once in a while. He feels so relaxed that he is prompted to fall asleep, but he wants to remain awake to keep enjoying the feeling of the wonderful hands of his husband on his back, removing every terrible knot Dean’s back has accumulated all these years.

“Are you falling asleep?” Castiel asks with a low but soft voice.

Dean smiles. “Almost.” He opens his eyes and looks at his husband. “I’m so freaking relaxed.”

Castiel smiles and he leans onto Dean to peck his lips. “I’m glad. And I’m also done. Unless you want me to keep massaging you.”

“Well, I would love to, but if I get more relaxed, I don’t think I’m gonna be able to move in a week. And I’ve gotta make dinner.”

Castiel chuckles and lies next to Dean, lying on his side and stretching his arm so he can caress Dean’s back, tenderly. Dean leans closer to the ex-angel’s face and kisses him, slowly but sweetly, taking his time to taste his lips.

“If I weren’t this relaxed, I’d give you a massage,” Dean murmurs. “But I’ve gotta tell you that I’m not as good as you are.”

“I’ll be the judge of that when you give me one.”

Dean smiles and then he looks at the scar on Cas’ neck. The wound healed pretty well, but there is still a mark that reminds Dean of the event. Both of them have scars, getting new ones with every hunt. They aren’t as fast and agile as they used to be ten years ago, and they don’t have Cas’ grace to heal wounds and remove scars, so they bodies now always carry a reminder of those hunts when they were too close or not fast enough.

“Stop looking at it,” Castiel says. “It’s healed.”

Dean can’t help it. Every time Cas gets a serious wound, even though he heals, Dean can’t stop looking at the wound or the scar that appears after the wound is gone. They have had serious wounds, and times when Dean thought that hunt was going to be the last time Cas would make it alive, but they still are there, but Dean is fearing more and more the time when Cas will get hurt and it will be mortal. He knows that Cas fears the same thing when the situation is reversed.

He rolls onto his side and caresses Castiel’s scar, feeling under his fingertips how the skin of the scar feels different that the rest of Castiel’s skin. Cas has become one of the best hunters Dean has ever known, but he is still vulnerable, like anybody else. Cas used to be this almost impossible to kill angel, who only got hurt with two of three weapons, but now, he can get hurt with anything. It was a concept that scared Dean so much during the first months after Cas became permanently human. The thought still haunts him, and he knows Cas is more than capable of defending himself, but anything can go wrong in a hunt, and Dean has seen Cas die too many times. He has always come back from the dead, but Dean knows that now, if Cas dies, it’s a permanent thing. And he is not ready for that.

Castiel begins to caresses Dean’s hair. “You worry too much. You think I don’t notice, but I do. Your eyes always betray you.”

Dean makes a half smile. “You’ve always been too good at reading me just by looking at my eyes.”

“Not always.” His fingers brush Dean’s hair, drawing a pattern, and Dean lets out a silent sigh, enjoying the feeling. He just loves it when Cas touches him. “There were times when it was difficult to understand what your eyes were trying to say. I got better with the years, though.”

“Yeah, you did.”

He kisses him and then he sits on the bed, looking for his t-shirt and plaid shirt. Even though the bedroom is warm, his skin feels chill. The last thing he wants is to get sick. He spots his clothes on the chair and he stands up and walks towards the desk and begins to put on his clothes, aware of Cas’ eyes on him. As he puts on his red plaid shirt, he looks at the framed photo of he and Cas, on their wedding day. He can’t help smiling at it.

“Hey,” Castiel says, placing his hand on the small of Dean’s back. “Are you okay?”

Dean nods. “Yeah.” He pecks his lips. “Wanna go out? I’m getting some cabin fever.”

“Of course.”

Dean smiles and grabs his leather jacket. He also hands Castiel his trench coat and both of them put them on before leaving their bedroom. They tell Sam they are going out before they head to the garage and get into the Impala.

It is raining outside, and Dean immediately switches on the windshield wiper. He sighs relieved as he drives. It has been a couple of days since he got out of the bunker. Lately, staying in it for a long time, without going out, makes his skin itch. Back when they first started living in it, it didn’t bother Dean, but not being able to see the outside world, is starting to get on his nerves. He can stay in the bunker for a few days, without going out, but he is starting to need to get out more often. The lack of windows is a huge problem.

“Wanna go somewhere in special?” Dean asks.

Castiel makes a thoughtful face. “Isn’t Wednesdays when the farmer’s marker comes to Lebanon?”

“I’m not sure. Check it out on your phone.” He turns the wheel and drives towards Lebanon. “Even if it’s today, do you think they’re out there? It’s raining pretty heavily.”

Castiel hums, without taking his eyes from the phone screen. “I have seen them there even when it hails.” He scrolls down on his screen and nods to himself. “The farmer’s market is today in Lebanon.”

“Good.”

The ex-angel puts his phone back in his pocket and then looks at Dean. “Want to talk about what’s going on with you?”

Dean looks at him, with a frown. “What do you mean?”

“Dean,” he simply says, calling his bullshit.

Dean sighs, frustrated. Hiding anything from Cas is always useless. “I’m just—” He doesn’t know how to put it with words. He nibbles his lower lip, trying to find the way to express how he is feeling. Cas waits, patiently, like he always does. “I’m just feeling a bit down. This last hunt has left me a bit shaken. And you know how my head likes to fuck me up once in a while.”

“Yes, I know.” He reaches Dean’s hand and squeezes it, softly. “Is there anything I can do to make you feel better?”

Dean smiles and blushes. “Just be with me. Like this. That’s all I want.”

“Of course.”

“And also a blowjob later might make wonders.” He wiggles his eyebrows and gives Castiel a smirk.

Castiel arches his brow. “Is that your solution to everything? Blowjobs?”

“Blowjobs or any kind of sex with you.”

Castiel shakes his head but smiles. “You are such an assbutt, Dean.”

Dean grins. “After all this time together, you still sound surprised by that fact.”

Castiel simply smiles.

By the time they reach the place in Lebanon where the farmer’s market is, the rain has ceased, so they don’t need to grab any umbrellas. But the weather is still cold, and Dean thanks the warmth of his jacket and the fact that Castiel is pressed against his side, with their arms laced. Some people give them some weird looks, but both Dean and Castiel are used to those looks and both ignore it.

“Wanna know something I haven’t told you?” Dean asks as they walk together, looking for the stalls they know for coming way too often.

“Of course,” Castiel says, intrigued and excited.

“Remember that fair in Wichita we went to a couple of years ago?” he asks, and Castiel nods. “You went away, looking for honey, and I spot you in that stall, talking happily to the woman who attended you. You were so happy and beautiful. That was the first time I was able to think that I loved you instead of I L-word you.”

Castiel looks at him, perplexed, but there is some lovely blush making it into his cheeks. “Really?”

Dean hums. “Really. I wanted to tell you right away, but the word still didn’t come out.” He sighs, and then points with his head a stall of honey. “I guess you’re looking for honey, right?”

“My honey is right here,” Castiel says, casually, but Dean knows he is making a poor attempt at making some kind of joke.

“Your jokes are fucking terrible, Cas.”

“I know that even if they are terrible, you still love them.” He smiles, tenderly, and then he pecks Dean’s lips.

“That’s ‘cause you’re adorable, not because your jokes are amusing.”

Castiel rolls his eyes. “Let’s get some honey, Dean.”

“Alright.”

They get honey, apples, milk, berries and a few vegetables that Castiel doesn’t grow in the greenhouse, like lettuces and carrots. They get back to the Impala carrying too many bags, but both of them are really satisfied and happy with their goods.

“Wanna go home or do you wanna go somewhere else?” Dean asks when Castiel closes the passenger’s door.

“Do you have somewhere in mind?” Castiel asks.

“It’s still early. I don’t have to make supper until a couple of hours. I don’t know.” He thinks about somewhere else they can go to in Lebanon. They could drive somewhere else, but that would take them too long, and Dean wants to go back home to make dinner in time.

“I’ve heard there’s an art exposition about impressionism downtown. I would really love to go.”

“Okay, let’s go.”

Castiel makes a timid, but pleased smile.

It is easy to find the place where the exposition is, but it is harder to find a parking spot. Nevertheless, Dean finds a nice spot and both of them leave the Impala behind and walk to the gallery. The price is a bit higher than Dean expected, but he doesn’t mind paying for it, because Cas seems really happy. They aren’t too tight on money, thanks to some money Charlie got them before she moved out.

It is a small place to host an exposition, but the person who organized it, really seized the space to hold as many paintings as possible.

“I like these painters,” Dean confesses in a murmur. The place isn’t too crowded, but it is really quiet, so Dean doesn’t want to spoil the quietness of it. “I like the colors and the ways it’s drawn.”

“Impressionism is one of my favorite painting eras,” Castiel murmurs, watching in awe a painting by Sorolla, named _Walk on the Beach_. “I love how painters worked the light and the colors.” They move to the next painting _Le Boulevard de Montmartre, Matinée de Printemps_ by Pissarro. “The brush strokes are so different from the previous painting eras, but they still show what they are painting. It makes it look almost magical.” He turns to look at Dean, who is looking at him with a soft look and a pretty smile. “What?”

“I love it when you talk passionately about something you enjoy.”

Castiel blushes. “You are making me blush.”

Dean chuckles.

They spend a long time on the gallery, looking at each painting, paying attention to every detail. Dean listens to Castiel’s explanations and both of them talk about a couple of paintings. By the time they leave the place, the sun is gone and the night colors have painted the sky.

“That was enjoyable,” Dean says as he starts the engine. “I really needed to get out of the bunker and clear my head.”

“I’m glad you enjoyed it,” Castiel says.

Dean reaches Castiel’s hand and they intertwine their fingers.

“Do you feel better?” Castiel asks, looking at him.

“Yeah. But I still want that blowjob.”

Castiel rolls his eyes. “Of course you do.”

Dean grins and drives back home.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much as always for reading, for the kudos, the comments, the bookmarks and the subscriptions :)

Dean parks the car in front of the Mexican restaurant. Sam is waiting in the motel room for their dinner while he does some research on his laptop for the case. They have been in this town for five days and they still have no clue what they are dealing with.  
Instead of getting out of the Impala to grab their dinner, Dean remains in the car and grabs his phone, calling to Cas. As he puts the phone onto his ear, his thumb caresses the chilly white gold ring.

“ _Hello, Dean,_ ” Castiel says when he picks up the phone.

Dean smiles, pleased to hear his husband’s voice. “Hey, Cas. How’s that cold of yours going?”

Castiel got sick almost a week ago. That’s why he didn’t come to this hunt. He was in no conditions to go out and hunt monsters, so Sam and Dean decided to take this hunt alone, leaving Cas in the bunker. Dean didn’t like the idea of leaving his ill husband alone, but Cas insisted that he could deal with it. He was sick to go hunting, but not too bad to stay at home and make himself food.

“ _It’s better,_ ” Castiel answers. “ _My fever is completely gone and I don’t feel cold anymore. I still have a runny nose, but that’s fine. Did you two finally found what you are dealing with?_ ”

Dean clicks his tongue. “Nope. We think it’s some sort of pagan god, but we’re not sure. The one behind of these two kills is smart and cautious. There are no previous records of deaths like these ones. For some reason, this god made some mistakes, but for the rest, it’s almost as if it was perfect at killing.” He tilts up his head and looks at the roof of the Impala. “The second victim had some kind of wound that looked as if a snake had bitten him, but we finally were able to get the files of the first victim today, and the photograph of the wound looks like a trident. Apart for both victims having missed parts, nothing makes sense.”

Castiel remains in silence, and Dean knows that he is thinking about the information Dean just gave him. “ _It could be Chamunda, an Indian goddess. She used to be offered human sacrifices a long time ago. She probably ended in America, somehow._ ”

Dean opens the glove box and grabs a pen and a small notebook he keep there. “Chamunda you say?” he asks, and Castiel hums in agreement. “Okay, we’ll take a look at it.” He writes down the name of the goddess and then puts the pen and notebook back inside. “Hopefully that’ll be the thing we’re dealing with. This hunt is taking too long. I just wanna go home. I miss you so fucking much.”

“ _I miss you so fucking much, too, Dean,_ ” Castiel says, and Dean can hear his smile on his voice. “ _Home is lonely without you._ ”

Dean sighs and closes his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose. He misses Cas so much. “We’ll try to finish this hunt as soon as possible. I promise.”

“ _I know._ ”

He smiles, nostalgically and sighs. “I’ve gotta go. Sam must be wondering why I haven’t arrived to the motel with the food yet.”

Castiel chuckles. “ _Okay. I love you._ ”

“I love you, too.”

“ _Be safe, please._ ”

“I will, I promise.”

Castiel hums and then he hangs up.

Dean sighs and looks at his phone, at his lock screen; it’s a photo of him and Cas that they took in the house of California. Both of them are smiling and pressed together. Dean smiles at that photo, wanting to see his husband soon. He misses him.

 

_____

 

The first thing Dean does when he parks the Impala in the bunker’s garage and gets out, is to find Cas. Judging by the time that it is, he is pretty sure that Cas must be in the greenhouse, taking care of the many different plants he grows there.

As he walks through the long halls of the bunker, Dean’s heart beats fast, filled with anticipation. He soon reaches the greenhouse, and he sees Cas, kneeling in front of a plant, working on it. Dean’s heart skips a beat and he smiles, being glad that he is back home after a really long hunt and so happy to see that Cas is there.

Castiel turns his face when he notices Dean’s presence and he smiles, delighted and relieved, his whole face brightening at the sight of Dean. “Hello, Dean.”

“Hey, Cas.”

Castiel stands up and walks towards Dean, who drops his duffel bag onto the floor and he and Castiel hug, tightly. Dean sighs, contently and relieved, almost shaking, closing his eyes and focusing on Castiel’s body pressed against him, holding each other, as if they hadn’t seen each other in a decade.

The familiar smell of storms and cotton, so characteristic of Cas, fills Dean’s nose, and he tightens his hold around Cas, not wanting to let go. Being in Cas’ arms is being home, is a sense of finally, a sense of belonging, of not being lost anymore. Dean feels loved, and it is an awesome feeling.

The ex-angel pulls away a little, but they still hold each other. He leans and kisses Dean, sweetly, but with a hint of desperation that Dean shares. It’s been too long since they last kissed and both are craving to kiss again.

“Are you hurt?” Castiel asks, cupping Dean’s face.

“Just a couple of bruises,” Dean answers. “Nothing to worry about. Everything went good. You were right, by the way. It was the Chamunda.” He kisses him again, taking his time to savor Castiel’s mouth. “Fuck, I missed you so much.”

Castiel smiles, brightly, and Dean’s heart skips a beat again. “I missed you, too, Dean.”

“Am I interrupting?” Sam asks, appearing out of nowhere.

“Hello, Sam,” Castiel greets and he pulls away from Dean to give the younger Winchester a hug that Sam reciprocates. “Are you hurt?” he asks when he pulls away, placing himself next to Dean, who gets his arm around Castiel’s shoulders. He needs to feel Cas close to him, and so does Castiel, given that he leans into Dean’s touch and places his hand on the small of his back.

“Only a few bruises. Nothing too serious. Did you recover from your cold?”

“I did.”

Dean kisses Castiel’s cheek. “He looks great again, doesn’t he?”

Castiel chuckles and blushes, and Sam grins.

“I’m gonna take a shower,” Sam announces, looking at Dean.

“Alright, I’ll take one later. Then I’ll make dinner,” Dean says.

“I will make dinner, Dean,” Castiel says, looking at Dean. “You need to rest. I can make some stuffed eggplants. You know I’m not bad at making them.”

“Yes, Cas, please, I want to eat some vegetables,” Sam pleads with puppy eyes.

“Yeah, make some. I’m glad that for once I don’t have to make supper,” Dean chuckles, resting his temple against Cas’. “Hurry up with the shower, Sam. I don’t wanna eat too late.”

Sam rolls his eyes. “Shut up, jerk.”

“Bitch.”

Sam chuckles and leaves the greenhouse.

“Wanna join me in the shower?” Dean asks, before kissing Castiel’s jaw.

“I have to make dinner, Dean. Stuffed eggplants take time for those who aren’t expert chefs.”

Dean chuckles and blushes. “You flatterer.” He kisses his lips, softly. “You sure you don’t need help in the kitchen?”

“I’m sure. I haven’t burnt anything during these days.”

He looks at him, impressed. “That’s a record.”

“Assbutt.”

Dean chuckles and then pulls away, grabbing his duffel bag. “Well, I’m gonna unpack this and then I’m gonna shower.”

“Okay.” He kisses him again, smiling into it. “I should better start with dinner.”

 

_____

 

“I’m gonna hit the hay,” Sam announces as he stands up. “I’m tired.”

“It’s early for bed,” Dean says, looking at the clock hanging on the wall.

“Yeah, but I’m wasted, man, and I really need to sleep. Besides, I know that you two are dying to get your hands on each other.” He makes a bitch face and Dean can’t help chuckling while Castiel smiles, timidly. “So, I’m gonna head early. Goodnight, guys.”

“Goodnight, Sam,” Dean and Castiel say at the same time.

“Should we give him five courtesy minutes?” Dean asks when Sam has disappeared down the hall. He gets his hand on Castiel’s thigh, landing it really close to Castiel’s crotch. 

Castiel frowns. “Five courtesy minutes?”

“Yeah. That’s enough time to let Sam fall asleep before we get really loud.”

Acknowledgement appears on Castiel’s face, and then he makes a rogue smile. “Can you really wait five minutes?” Without hesitation at all, Castiel gets his hand on Dean’s crotch, and Dean gasps, surprised.

“Fuck it, let’s go to the bedroom.”

He stands up, grabs Castiel’s hand and they go to their bedroom, almost running.

The moment they close the door, Castiel presses Dean against it and they begin to kiss, desperate and needy, with restless hands that are hungry to touch. They roll their hips slightly, seeking friction, and Dean’s mind is overblown by how much he missed this feeling.

“What do you want, Dean?” Castiel asks as he kisses and sucks Dean’s neck, turning Dean’s knees into jelly.

“I want you to fuck me,” Dean breathes out. “Cas, I wanna come on your cock.”

Castiel moans, delighted by the plan and he finds Dean’s mouth and gives him a breathtaking kiss. “Okay.”

As Castiel deepens the kiss, Dean fists the back of Castiel’s shirt while his other hand moves restlessly on his hair, making a bigger mess. He is thankful to be pressed in between Castiel and the door, because otherwise he would fall.

Castiel’s hands descend, reaching the back of Dean’s thighs, and Dean jumps, helping Cas to lift him. The ex-angel tilts his head up as Dean tilts it down so they can meet in the middle and keep kissing. Dean gets his arms around Castiel’s neck, and Castiel carries him towards the bed, without breaking the kiss.

Dean is laid onto the bed carefully, and he watches how Castiel kneels onto it, with Dean’s body in between his legs. Dean gets his hand on Castiel’s nape and pulls him down to kiss him, pressing their bodies together. Dean has missed Cas’ warmth so much.

They begin to take each other’s clothes, touching their skins when a piece of clothing is removed, kissing the whole time unless they need to pull away. Their hands are skilled and eager, hungry to touch, to feel.

There is a moment when Dean pulls away from the kiss and cups Castiel’s face and looks at him. His blue eyes are a tiny ring around his dilated pupils, and Dean knows his own eyes are the same, only that in green. Castiel places his hand above Dean’s and he smiles, before they share a sweet kiss and keep taking off their remaining clothes.

Once they are naked, they deepen their kiss. Dean can’t stop touching Castiel’s body, tracing down the familiar shapes of Castiel’s strong and beefy body, the curves of his body, the warmth of his skin, pressing him closer, not wanting to leave a single inch in between them, and neither does Castiel.

The ex-angel begins to kiss Dean’s jaw, going straight to the places he knows Dean is more sensitive, and also taking special attention to the skin behind his ear, grinning against Dean’s skin when the freckled man moans and arches his back. His fingers play on Dean’s nipples, hardening them under his touch. Then, he slides down and wraps his lips around Dean’s cock, just to get him harder, but it makes Dean spread his legs and moan his husband’s name, filthily and loudly.

He pulls away and goes back to kissing Dean while he opens the drawer, and Dean makes sure to rub his hard cock against Castiel’s, which earns him a muffled moan followed by another gloriously rubbing of their cocks.

Castiel wastes no time in putting on the condom and spreading the lube, proceeding to finger Dean, who moans pleased at the burn and the feeling of Cas’ fingers inside him. He closes his eyes and sighs before Castiel presses tiny kisses on his lips, savoring each moan Dean makes when his slender fingers brush his prostate.

After loosening Dean with his four fingers, Castiel pulls them away, wiping them on the sheets. Immediately, Dean gets his legs around Castiel’s waist and pulls him down, making Castiel smile as he settles onto Dean. He cups Dean’s face before kissing it and Dean places his hands on Castiel’s back, digging his nails into his flesh when he feels Castiel’s cock getting into his hole.

Dean moans as he feels Castiel sliding inside him. He feels his hardness inside him, filling him like nobody else has ever filled him, removing his emptiness. He holds onto him tightly, even if he knows Cas isn’t going to go anywhere, but he needs to hold onto him, to feel him as close as possible.

Castiel lets out a breath when he is fully settled inside Dean. He kisses him, and Dean moans, sweetly, his fingers brushing Castiel’s hair. He moves his hips slightly, telling Cas to move, and the ex-angel doesn’t need to be told twice; he starts moving, and both of them pull away from the kiss to moan each other’s name.

They try to kiss as much as they can. It is always better when they kiss while they do it. They can’t kiss all the time, because they moan and groan, but they try to seize every occasion they have to just kiss.

Dean can’t help moaning and groaning, he loves the way Cas thrusts into him, then pulls out and then slams back inside him, fucking him way too good, but always keeping a pace that is the love making kind, making Dean feel loved and wanted. And Dean knows that Castiel feels the same, no matter what their positions are.

Castiel moves one of his hands to Dean’s waist and grips him tightly, lifting his ass a little, resulting into a better angle that has Castiel’s cock hitting Dean’s sweet spot with every maddening roll of his hips, turning Dean into a mess of moans, and making him lose his rhythm, feeling how the warmth in his stomach begins to bloom quickly.

“Fuck, Cas—”

Dean makes sounds that are almost guttural, and he would be a bit embarrassed if Cas wasn’t making the same sounds. Everything is too much and keeps building and building, and Dean comes, quite sooner than usually, moaning Castiel’s name as his whole body trembles and surrenders under him. But Castiel holds him tightly as he keeps coming, painting both of their bellies.

“Dean— Dean, oh fuck, Dean—”

Dean clenches really tight around Castiel, aware of how much his husband loves that feeling. It only takes Cas two more thrusts to come inside Dean, moaning Dean’s name as he keeps fucking in and out of him, burying his face in the crook of Dean’s neck, only stopping when his release is done.

The sounds of their pants fill the room. Dean remains with his eyes closed, still seeing stars. He is extremely happy and extremely sated. He spreads his legs onto the mattress, feeling sore, although he moves his leg, caressing Castiel’s shin with his sole. He keeps holding Castiel in his arms. Cas’ breath is warm against his skin. He is smiling and Dean can feel it against his skin, making him smile.

Castiel mumbles something in enochian and he begins to kiss Dean’s collarbone, slowly ascending until he finds Dean’s lips and they kiss, lazily but sweetly. Dean buries his fingers in Castiel’s hair, pulling him even closer.

“I don’t think I’m gonna be able to walk straight for a week,” Dean says with a big smirk.

Castiel frowns. “Dean, you never walk straight. You have bowlegs.”

Dean rolls his eyes. “Always so literal.”

Castiel simply smiles and kisses him before he pulls away from Dean and removes the condom, knotting it and throwing it to the bin. He grabs some wipes and cleans the two of them, the wipe ending up in the bin as well after Castiel is done. He continues to kiss Dean after that, cupping his face, and Dean rests his hands on Castiel’s shoulders as he gets his tongue inside Castiel’s mouth.

The ex-angel begins to trace down Dean’s body with his mouth, kissing his chin, his neck, his chest and his stomach. Dean sighs, happily, loving the feeling of Cas’ lips and the burn of his stubble on his freckled skin. Castiel eventually settles in between Dean’s legs and begins to kiss the inner of Dean’s thighs, making Dean close his eyes and bite his lower lip.

Castiel takes his time praising the sensitive skin, leaving several hickeys and soothing them with gentle kisses.

“You wanna get me hard again?” Dean asks, almost moaning.

“Maybe I want to,” Castiel simply says before kissing the spot where he just made a hickey. Then, he looks at Dean. “I missed you so much.”

“I missed you, too, Cas.” He caresses Castiel’s cheeks and prompts him to move up so they can share a sweet kiss.

Dean embraces him tightly with his right arm while his left hand teases Castiel’s hole. He just gives it some pressure, nothing further, but it still makes Castiel moan against the kiss. He pulls away and looks at Dean with an arched brow.

“Are you looking for a second round?” Castiel asks.

“Well, that sounds awesome, but I’m beaten, sweetheart,” Dean answers, making an apologetic pout. Then, he kisses him. “It’s been a long hunt and a really long drive. And after this fucking awesome sex we just had, I’m in no shape to do anything else.”

“Not even kissing?” He gives him a puppy eyed look.

Dean grins. “I still can do that.” He leans and kisses him, tenderly, loving how both of them make happy, little moans into it. He moves his hand to cup Castiel’s face, his fingertips brushing his dark and sweaty hair. “Fuck, it’s so good to be back.”

“It’s great to have you back, Dean.” He kisses him again. “Welcome home, beloved.” He plants another lingering kiss. “I love you.”

“I love you, too, Cas.”

 

_____

 

When Dean wakes up, the first thing he does is to look at Cas, who is still sleeping and holding Dean like an octopus. Dean can’t blame him; his embrace on Cas is as tight as his husband’s. Dean had missed waking up next to Cas. He smiles and kisses his head. He doesn’t bother looking at what time it is. There is no rush today. He just wants to be in bed with Cas for as long as possible, so he closes his eyes and sighs, tightening his grip around Cas a little bit more.

Eventually, Castiel wakes up, but he doesn’t open his eyes; he nuzzles Dean’s neck and sighs, holding Dean tightly. He always does that because he wants to prevent Dean from leaving bed, but Dean doesn’t want to get up yet. He looks at Cas and caresses his hair, almost brushing it, while his other hand makes soothing circles on his shoulder.

Castiel kisses Dean’s neck and opens his eyes, smiling when he finds Dean’s green eyes staring at him. “Hello, Dean.”

Dean grins. “Hey, Cas.” He steals a quick kiss. “Good morning sunshine.” He makes a teasing smirk and says, “Wanna get up?”

Castiel groans and buries his face in Dean’s neck. “I didn’t miss your morning energy.”

Dean can’t help snorting. “I was just teasing you. I don’t wanna get up yet.”

That makes Castiel give him a sassy look. “Who are you and what have you done to my husband?”

Dean chuckles. “Can’t I be lazy for once? Besides, we’re warm, cozy and you’re naked and we’re embracing. Why would I want to leave bed just yet?”

Castiel smiles and kisses him. “Wise decision, beloved.”

“But we’ll get up when my stomach starts to growl.”

“Of course.”

They remain in bed for a long time, holding each other and caressing each other, sharing a kiss once in a while. Dean loves it when they get to be like this, and so does Castiel.

When Dean’s stomach begins to protest, both of them get up. They change the sheets and then they go to the bathroom to take a shower, sharing more kisses and move caresses, washing each other after that.

Once they are dressed, they go to the kitchen to make breakfast. Castiel immediately prepares coffee while Dean begins to grab everything he needs to make pancakes.

“Here,” Castiel says, handing Dean his mug filled with coffee. 

Dean smiles and takes a sip. “Fuck, I missed your coffee. No one makes coffee like you, Cas.”

Castiel smiles and blushes. “Thank you, Dean.”

Dean sets his mug aside and gets into Cas’ personal space, getting his hands on his waist while Castiel gets his on Dean’s shoulders. They press their foreheads together and just look at each other, smiling.

“You two are so sappy,” Sam says from the doorway, smirking.

Dean rolls his eyes and shakes his head before he pulls away, hoping nobody can see him blushing. “Shut up, Sam.”

“Do you want some coffee, Sam?” Castiel asks before giving Dean’s shoulder a soft squeeze.

Sam nods, effusively. “Yes, please.”

 

_____

 

“Did you grab the shopping list?” Dean asks when Castiel closes the Impala’s door.

Castiel hums and nods. “I did.”

“Good.” He starts the car and they are soon leaving the bunker’s garage behind. “You should’ve gone to get some groceries while we were out hunting.”

“I prefer buying with you,” Castiel says, casually. “Besides, if I had gone to the supermarket all by myself, you would have complained about buying too much healthy crap.”

Dean chuckles. “Yeah, that sounds like me.” He looks at Cas and they both smile. “That’s why we always go together. I buy the junk food and you buy the healthy food. It’s a perfect balance.” He drums his fingers on the wheel, humming to the song that lowly plays in the car. “I was thinking about making some fresh pasta for dinner and filling it with gorgonzola and pears, and also making a sauce for it, I think it was called pesto rosso panna, and it had cream, sun-dried tomatoes, pine nuts, cheese and walnuts.”

Castiel gives him a tender look. “Isn’t that one of the recipes you watched on the Food Network?”

“Yeah? So? Is that a problem?”

“Of course not.” He smiles. “I just find it adorable that you watch cooking shows so you can make all those wonderful dishes.”

Dean can’t help blushing. “So, I take that as a yes to the pasta?”

“Yes. My mouth is already watering by thinking about dinner.”

Dean hums. “I’m glad. Will you help me?”

“Of course.”

“Awesome.” He grins.

“I recorded you your favorite shows from the Food Network while you were away. I thought you might enjoy them.”

“You’re the best, Cas.” He reaches Cas’ hand and presses a quick kiss on the back of it, without missing the lovely blush that appears on his cheeks. “Blush suits you.”

“Shut up, Dean.”

Dean laughs.

“Do we have a pasta machine at home?” Castiel asks, frowning. “You could use the rolling pin, but that would take longer.”

“I was thinking about using the rolling pin, actually.” He shrugs and then looks at Cas, who grabs his phone and starts to type something on it. “What are you doing?”

“Finding somewhere in Lebanon where they sell pasta machines.”

“Cas, we don’t need a pasta machine. I can use the rolling pin.”

“If the fresh pasta turns out to be a success, which I suspect it will be, you are going to make it more often, and a pasta machine eases the work. I have watched with you how fresh pasta is made, and every time a chef tries to make it using a rolling pin, they end up exhausted, so I’m not letting you waste your energy when there is a machine that eases the work,” he says without taking his eyes from the screen. Dean is about to protest about how they don’t need to spend money on that, but Castiel says, “Don’t you dare to argue me on this.”

Dean groans. “Cas, it’s a waste of money.”

“It’s something you can use to make food. It’s not a waste of money.” He gives Dean a warning look. “I’ve found a place where they sell them for thirty dollars. And judging some of the reviews on the internet, this pasta machine seems to be quite good for its price.”

“Since when do you read reviews on products?” Dean asks, arching his eyebrow.

“I have found in the past that reviews can be very helpful when I have to buy something I haven’t bought before.” He locks his phone and then he puts it back inside the pocket. “Although some people in the internet seem to be really mean and angry without any reason at all.”

“That’s the internet,” he says, laughing.

 

_____

 

Sam walks into Dean and Cas reading the instructions on the pasta machine.

“How you guys doing?” Sam asks as he walks towards the counter to get himself an orange.

“We’re still trying to figure out how to use this damn thing,” Dean answers, looking at the crank.

“Once it starts working, you will stop calling it damn thing,” Castiel sasses, glaring him. He snatches the crank from Dean’s hands and puts it where it belongs. “Okay, let’s get the pasta dough and put it in the slot.”

“Alright.” Dean does as he is told. He grabs the dough and puts it in the slot while Castiel turns the crank, appearing a flattened dough that makes Dean grin while Castiel looks at him with a smug face. “Yeah, yeah, you were right. Stop being so smug about it.”

“Don’t worry, you’ll get used to the pasta machine after using it next time,” Sam says with a smirk.

Dean snorts. “I haven’t done the pasta yet and you’re already requesting it for another day.”

Sam shrugs casually. “Knowing you, it’s gonna be delicious.”

Dean rolls his eyes but smiles.

“I agree with Sam,” Castiel adds.

“Whatever,” Dean says, grinning.

“Well, I’ll leave you guys alone with the pasta,” Sam says after peeling the orange and throwing the peel to the bin.

“The day you help in the kitchen, I’m gonna think you’re possessed.”

“I’m not as good as you are, Dean. And I know you’d rather have Cas helping you in the kitchen than me.”

Dean looks at his brother, sassily. “You’re just saying that as an excuse to not help.” He wipes his hands on a cloth and grabs a knife to cut the pasta into the shapes for the raviolis. “But it’s more enjoyable to have Cas because he’s a great kisser.” He looks at Cas and presses his lips, asking for a quick peck and Castiel gives it to him. “And you, on the other hand, would leave this kitchen full of those fucking long hairs of yours.”

Sam rolls his eyes.

“You are just giving him another excuse to not help, Dean,” Castiel says as he grabs the bowl that contains the filling of gorgonzola and pears.

Dean shrugs. “Maybe, but he’s right about me enjoying cooking more with you than him. You’re a much better company.”

“Jerk,” Sam says.

Dean grins. “Bitch.”

“I’m gonna keep reading. Call me when dinner’s ready.”

“Yeah, lazy ass.”

“Shut up, Dean,” Sam says as he leaves the kitchen.

Dean chuckles. “It smells really good, doesn’t it?”

“It truly does,” Castiel agrees. He dips his finger in the filling and makes a pleased face. “Delicious.” He is about to dip it again but Dean grabs his wrist. “Dean.”

“No. I know you. Once you taste something you like, you can’t stop. That’s one of the few bad things about cooking with you. You eat everything unless I stop you.” He snatches the bowl from his side and gives him a warning look while Castiel gives him a pleading look. “Look at me like that all you want to, I’m not gonna give in.” He looks at Cas, aware of what he is going to propose and quickly says, “And don’t you dare to blackmail me with sex.”

Castiel pouts. “You are mean, Dean.”

“I’m not mean, I’m just a sensible guy who knows that his glutton husband would eat the whole filling in just one sitting.”

“I’m not a glutton. I’m just an admirer of your food.”

Dean smirks. “Keep telling yourself that, Cas.”

His words earn him a kick on his shin. “Assbutt.”

“Dick.” He grabs a spoon and dips it on the filling and offers it to Cas. “Here. But just this. Don’t you dare to have more or we’ll have an argument.”

Castiel smiles and kisses Dean’s cheek before grabbing the spoon and putting in his mouth. “Thank you, Dean.”

“Don’t mention it.”

Castiel leaves the spoon clean and then he washes it, returning it to Dean, who uses it to get some filling and put it on the raviolis. Castiel does the same after watching how Dean does it.

“You do it so professionally,” Castiel says, impressed.

“You’re an exaggerator.”

“I am not.” He keeps adding the filling, slower than Dean, but Castiel still does a great job. “You are great at this.”

“Nah, it’s just experience.” He shrugs, not giving it too much importance. “I started cooking when I was four years old, so I just have decades of experience.”

“I am aware, but back then you didn’t cook the things you cook today. Mostly, it was canned food or things you could put in the microwave. And still, now you are capable of making some amazing dishes.”

“You just say that ‘cause you have spent almost your whole life without having to cook, and now that you have to, it seems like something difficult, but it really isn’t.”

Castiel looks at him, with an awed look and Dean doesn’t know why. “You are always so modest about your extraordinary skills.”

Dean rolls his eyes and blushes. “Do you always have to praise me?”

“Only when I have to.” He leans and nuzzles Dean’s cheek. “I know you still aren’t used to being praised.”

“It’s still unusual. But it feels nice to hear nice things about myself once in a while.” He begins to seal the ravioli, being very careful; he doesn’t want the filling to leak and end up in the boiling water. “My self-esteem appreciates it.” He smirks.

“And also your ego,” Castiel jokes, aware that Dean needs humor to ease the moment.

Dean smiles. “Thanks, y’know, for knowing when I need a joke and when I don’t.”

Castiel places his hand on Dean’s shoulder and kisses him, sweetly. “Don’t mention it, beloved.” He pecks his lips. “Should I put some music on?”

“Yeah, please.”

They keep making the fresh pasta while they listen to some music. The task takes its time, but Dean has an amazing company and he loves making food. Cas helps him a lot, because he has improved in the kitchen, and he is also more confident, which helps a lot and eases things.

They finally boil the pasta, and Sam comes to the kitchen, called by the overwhelming smell of the pesto rossa panna sauce Dean made. The fresh pasta takes less time than the other pasta to boil, and soon, the three of them sit around the table to enjoy the tasty dish.

Cas was right; they are going to end up using the pasta machine again.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading, for the comments, the kudos, the bookmarks and the subscriptios ^^

Dean spreads the shaving foam on his face, making sure of covering all his stubble. Castiel is next to him, doing the same. Both of them are naked, only wearing a towel around the waist. The bathroom air is thick with the steam of the hot shower they just took, and Dean still has to wipe the mirror to let both of them see what they are doing.

“I miss that time when I didn’t have to shave,” Castiel protests, annoyed. “I’m going to have stubble by the end of the day; I don’t see the point on doing this every week.”

Dean rolls his eyes. “Do you wanna look like a fucking hipster?”

Castiel glares him. “Of course not. But I wish for my beard to grow at a slower pace.”

“You can’t control that, Cas.” He grabs a razorblade and begins to shave himself with a firm pulse. “Want me to get you an electric razor? It would ease the job for you.”

Castiel contemplates the idea as he shaves himself. Even though he has a really firm pulse, he doesn’t speak while he has the razorblade against his skin. “We should get one. You keep saying we should buy one every time we are on the road.”

Dean hums. They have talked about getting one for a really long time, but they haven’t bought it yet. “Yeah, I know. It’ll ease the job, but at the same time I like shaving like this. Though I haven’t used any electric razors, so I can’t tell if they’re better or not.” He wipes the razorblade in the water, getting rid of the foam.

“We could buy one and try it. We could check them on the internet.”

“Okay.”

They keep shaving themselves. Dean finishes first. He always does. Cas takes a little bit longer because he likes to be careful. When the ex-angel is done, he wipes his face from the remaining foam and then, Dean grins and nuzzles his jaw, feeling its softness, tickling Cas, who can’t help chuckling.

“So soft,” Dean says before kissing the shaved skin.

Castiel caresses Dean’s jaw, also shaved and smirks. “You are soft, too.” Then he finds Dean’s lips with his and they kiss.

Both of them enjoy feeling their faces shaved and unshaved. Both feelings are great for them. Dean loves the burn of Cas’ stubble against his skin and the feeling of Cas’ skin without his stubble. He just loves Cas in any possible way, and he knows that Cas feels the same about him.

Dean pulls away, with a big smile that Castiel also has on his face. He grabs the aftershave and he and Castiel apply it on their faces, feeling some burn. When he is done, Castiel caresses Dean’s hair, the part closest to his ears.

“You have grey hair,” Castiel says with a soft smile.

Dean frowns and looks at his reflection, looking at where Cas’ fingers were pointing and sees that he has some gray hair growing there. It is barely noticeable because of some of his lightest blonde hairs, but it is there. He smiles and sighs.

“Never thought I’d live to see myself getting grey hair,” Dean confesses. “I’m getting old.”

Castiel kisses his shoulder, making Dean look at him. “We are getting old.”

Dean smiles. “Yeah.” Then, he notices a grey hair on Castiel, and Dean grins. “Looks I’m not the only one getting gray hair.” He points where it is and Castiel looks at his reflection as well, smiling and something in Dean’s chest flutters. “You’re getting old with me.” His voice comes a bit shakier than he wanted to, which makes Castiel look at him in concern. Dean chuckles. “I just love that.”

He cups his face and kisses him, breathtakingly. At first, Cas seems surprised, but then he melts into the kiss and kisses him back. When they pull away, Dean is grinning, widely, and Castiel is smiling, but he also has some confusion in his beautiful blue eyes.

“Dean, I’ve been human for years now. Why are you so surprised to see that I’m getting old?”

Dean smiles. “I’m not surprised, I’m glad.”

“I fail to understand, beloved.”

Dean can’t help grinning. He slides his hands down Castiel’s arms, until he reaches his hands, lacing their fingers. “Cas, I— I never thought I was gonna get this, and seeing that we’re growing old together, makes me really happy, because I’m not getting old alone.” He rests his forehead against Castiel’s. “I never thought I would get old, and much less that I would get old with someone.”

Understanding fills Castiel’s face and he smiles before kissing Dean. “You are a sap, Dean.”

“Shut up, dick.”

“Assbutt.”

 

_____

 

Sam keeps looking at his laptop while the three of them eat their breakfast, which consist on coffee, made by Cas, and some tomatoes toasts and eggs breakfast muffins. Cas can’t stop humming and making tiny little moans over the food, which makes Dean grin and blush. Sam shows his enthusiasm for his food with words.

“I found us a case,” Sam announces after swallowing the tomato toast.

Dean’s stomach sinks a little at those words. He enjoys hunting, but he is liking it less and less with every case. He loves saving people, that is one of the few good things about their job, but it is getting harder and harder. They are getting older and their bodies can’t deal with the after-hunt like they used to. And it is getting riskier for them to go to hunts.

Sam turns around the laptop and shows it to Dean, who wipes his mouth and hands on a napkin and looks at the articles Sam found about a case in Rochester, Minnesota. Castiel leans onto his side to take a better look.

“Could be a ghost,” Dean says.

“Thought so,” Sam agrees, turning around the laptop again. “A pissed off ghost.”

“Then it must be a really old ghost,” Castiel adds.

Sam hums. “Shall we go after breakfast?”

“Yeah,” Dean says before looking at his plate and getting a big piece of the eggs breakfast muffins into his mouth.

 

_____

 

“What’s wrong?” Castiel asks as he and Dean put their stuff into the duffel bag.

Dean looks at him, frowning. “What do you mean with what’s wrong?”

“You seem angry.”

Dean just snorts. “What makes you think that?”

“Dean,” Castiel insists. He grabs Dean’s arms and turns him around so their eyes can meet. “What’s going on?”

“It’s nothing, Cas.”

“Bullshit.”

Dean rolls his eyes but he can’t help making a tiny smile at hearing Cas cuss.

“Talk to me, Dean.”

Dean takes a deep breath. “I’m worried about the hunt. I’m worried about you getting hurt again.”

Castiel cups his face, his thumb stroking Dean’s cheekbone, and Dean leans onto the touch. “You worry too much about me, Dean.” He leans and kisses him, softly, and Dean hums into it, relieved. “Everything will be fine, Dean. I know how to defend myself.”

“Yeah, I know. You’re great at kicking ass. But I still worry.”

“I know.” He pecks his lips. “Don’t worry. We have each other’s backs. And we also have Sam’s back and he has our backs.”

“Yeah.” Dean smiles and kisses him. “Thanks, Cas.”

 

_____

 

The ghost turns out to be the most powerful they have ever encountered and one who has mastered telekinesis like no one else, which results into throwing Dean, Cas and Sam against the nearest wall over and over again.

Harry Pines turned out to be buried on a ground where an old factory is now built, which gives the ghost to hurt the three Winchesters with much different stuff. None of them is doing great, and they are quickly gaining bruises on their bodies and breaking more and more bones with every minute that passes.

It doesn’t matter how many times they shoot him with rock salt; the ghost quickly reappears and comes back angrier and pays it with the three living man, who have bleeding wounds on their heads and on their faces.

There is a moment when the ghost is busy with Sam and Castiel, and Dean seizes the occasion to run to the grave of the ghost and throw his lighter into it, already covered with salt and gas. The lighter reaches its destiny, but the ghost notices Dean's intentions, and before he starts burning, he makes one of the stone columns of the ceiling fall, landing on Dean’s right leg and breaking it.

“Dean!” Castiel and Sam yell at the same time when they hear Dean’s painful scream.

The moment the ghost starts burning, Castiel and Sam are free and they run towards Dean, lying next to the burning grave, screaming in pain. Castiel is the first one to arrive and he lifts Dean’s torso, laying it onto his lap, caressing his face.

“Dean, it’s okay, we’re here,” Castiel says, trying to ease his pain. “We are going to remove the column.”

“Okay,” Dean says, shaky, his fingers reaching for Castiel’s face.

Castiel kisses his hand and then he and Sam begin to remove the column. It is heavy, and it takes them a while to put it away from Dean’s broken leg, but they manage to do so, and Dean breathes, relieved, but still in pain.

“There we go,” Sam says as he and Castiel let the column fall down onto the floor, away from Dean.

“We are taking you to the hospital,” Castiel says, giving Dean a warning glare.

Dean would have usually complained, because he doesn’t like hospitals, but his leg is broken, and this is something that can be fixed in a motel room. “Alright, help me to stand up.” He sits using his elbows to do such thing and his husband and his brother immediately come to help him stand up, placing one of his arms around Cas’ shoulders and the other around Sam’s shoulders. “Fuck!” Dean screams when he is standing.

“Do you think you can make it?” Sam asks, worried. “The car is far.”

“I don’t know, Sammy. The leg hurts so bad.”

“I can carry you,” Castiel says. “Bridal style.”

Dean looks at Cas. “Cas, you’re beaten.”

“I don’t care.” He looks at Sam and indicates him to step aside. The younger Winchester brother does so and Castiel immediately places his hand behind Dean’s thighs and the other on his back waiting for Dean to get his arms around his neck and he lifts him, carefully. Dean feels some pain, but the moment he is lifted, the pain eases. “Better?”

“Yeah, a little.” He rests his cheek on Castiel’s shoulder and closes his eyes, breathing hard. “Thanks.”

Castiel and Sam begin to walk. Dean knows he is heavy on Castiel’s arms, but Castiel doesn’t seem to mind it. He carries Dean all the way to the Impala, as fast as he can, while Dean feels how his brain is trying to make him fall asleep so he can’t feel the intensity of the pain, but he remains awake, still feeling the pain of his broken leg. But once he is sat on the Impala, he passes out.

 

_____

 

Using a crutch is a pain in the ass in Dean’s opinion, but without it, he can’t walk. He has to wear a plaster that covers his leg from his foot to the middle of his thigh for almost two months and it reduces his mobility a lot. The last time he had to wear one was when the leviathans attacked Bobby’s house, and he hated waiting for his leg to heal.

“Hello, Dean,” Castiel says as he steps onto the living room, where Dean is watching the Food Network. He leans onto him and kisses him before showing him a bag. “I got you some more cheap jeans that we can cut so you can wear them while you still have the plaster.”

Dean smiles and tries to reach towards Cas, but he can’t, so Castiel leans and meets him halfway. “You’re the fucking best, Cas. Thanks. ”

Castiel smiles. “You’re welcome, Dean.”

Castiel begins to walk away, so he can puts the cheap jeans on their bedroom, but Dean says, “Cas, would you mind driving me somewhere?”

Castiel turns and walks towards Dean, until he is in front of him. “You need to rest, Dean.”

“Cas, it’s been two weeks since the last time I went out, I need to leave this place. I don’t care if we’re just driving around somewhere, I just need to leave. Please.”

The ex-angel sighs. “Fine. I will leave these on the bedroom and then we will go and take a ride.”

“Thanks.”

While Castiel walks to their bedroom, Dean switches off the TV and he stands up, using the crutch for that. Then, he begins to walk towards the garage, slowly, aware that Cas will appear next to him really soon and carrying his leather jacket, something that happens sooner than Dean expected.

Walking up the stairs that lead to the garage takes a little bit of time for Dean, but Castiel is patient and isn’t annoyed by how much time Dean requires to do some things. Dean really appreciates it.

The moment they reach the Impala, Dean unconsciously goes to the driver’s seat and he blushes, embarrassed when he realizes he can’t drive. Castiel gives him a tender look, which makes Dean feel a little bit less ashamed of himself. He feels like a burden with the crutch and the plaster, but Castiel keeps telling him that he is no burden.

“Do you have any place in mind?” Castiel asks as he starts the Impala.

Dean makes a thoughtful face. “Do you know that big hill we once went to see the fireworks of the fourth of July?”

“I do,” Castiel answers with a smile and he drives the car through the tunnel.

Dean turns on the music and smiles as he hears the mixtape he made a while ago for Castiel. He sighs happily and leans his face onto the cold window when the Impala drives out of the tunnel. It is nice to be out of the bunker and find a cloudy day with light skies.

“I missed this,” Dean confesses. “I hate having this fucking plaster.”

“You still have to wear it for a little bit more than a month,” Castiel says.

“You’re not helping, Cas.” He groans and looks at the landscape, feeling Cas’ worried eyes on him. “I feel useless.”

“You aren’t useless, Dean.”

Dean sighs and rubs his face. He still cooks, even if Sam and Castiel tell him he should be resting, but Dean hates not being able to do much, and besides, he is the one with the best cooking skills in the bunker, so he is doing a favor to the three of them.

“This is temporary, Dean,” Castiel adds. “Soon your leg will be healed and everything will be back to normal.”

“I know. But it’s still gonna take a long time.”

“With that attitude, it’s no wonder.”

Dean kicks his shin. “Dick.”

“Assbutt.” He turns his face, momentarily, and glares. “I’m driving, so don’t do that. My driving experience is short.”

“Maybe, but you’re a great driver.” He gives him a charming smile. “And you treat baby really good, so you don’t do as bad as you think.” He places his hand on Castiel’s thigh and gives it a comforting squeeze.

“Thank you, Dean.”

It doesn’t take them too long to reach the hill. Castiel parks the car, leaving some distance in between the Impala and the edge of the hill. They get out of the Impala and they sit on the hood. Dean feels the suffocating feeling of being around four walls for so long fade away as he breathes the chill air of the morning.

“I needed this,” Dean says, smiling. “Those walls were starting to suffocate me.”

Castiel nods. He moves his hand and places it on top of Dean’s, lacing their fingers. “I should have taken you out sooner. I was worried about your leg and didn’t want to increase the injury.”

“Don’t worry. If the situation was reversed, I’d have done the same.” He kisses Castiel’s cheek. “We’re here now, don’t think about the rest.” He rests his cheek on Cas’ shoulder and sighs, happily, watching the landscape in front of his eyes. “Thanks for bringing me here.”

“Don’t mention it, beloved.” He kisses the top of his head.

They remain pressed together, enjoying each other’s presence and the view in front of their eyes.

 

_____

 

“What did you get?” Castiel asks, the moment Dean gets back in the Impala. He is really confused.

Dean can’t blame him; he just told him to stop somewhere in town and made him stay in the car while he bought something he didn’t even tell him what it was. “Start the car and I’ll explain you,” Dean says.

Castiel frowns and tilts his head, but he does as he is told and starts the car, driving towards the road to go back home. “Would you mind doing the explaining now?”

Dean grins, pleased and amused. He gets his hand inside the brown paper bag and picks up what he is looking for. “This is what I’ve got us, Cas,” he says with a sing-song voice as he shakes a tiny plastic bag that contains pot. Castiel looks at him, astonished. “I thought we could use some fun tonight. I also bought some snacks, because we’re gonna get hungry after smoking a couple of joints.”

“How can they sell marijuana in there? Isn’t it illegal?”

Dean chuckles. “Yeah, so? It’s not like the two of us are model citizens. Every time we go hunting, we break about ten laws or more.”

Castiel shakes his head. “I’m married to a delinquent.”

“You knew what you were getting into when we started dating.” He shrugs and puts the pot bag inside the paper bag.

“What made you think about buying it?”

“I can’t do much with the fucking plaster, and I remembered that time when we got pretty bad in a hunt in California and the doctor gave us some therapeutic marijuana, and we had a lot of fun, so I thought we could do it again. Besides, you keep saying that I should give you joints instead of cigarettes.” He smirks and Castiel rolls his eyes. “What? You don’t wanna…”

“No, I do. But I’m surprised about the suddenness of it.” He steals a quick look at Dean. “Is everything alright, Dean?”

“Yeah, I just need to do something different, y’know? I can’t do much with the plaster, and I’m tired of watching too much TV and reading all the books we’ve got, I need to do something different.” He takes a deep breath and rubs his face. He knows Cas is looking at the road, but he keeps looking at Dean every chance he gets. “Getting out has helped to lift up my mood, and I feel like smoking a joint tonight with you and having a good time instead of sitting and wondering how long my leg is going to take to heal.”

Castiel reaches Dean’s hand and gives it a reassuring squeeze. “Okay, Dean.” He looks at Dean and he smiles. “We will do it tonight.”

“Awesome.” He kisses Cas’ hand, not missing the slight blush that appears on his cheeks. “Don’t tell Sam.”

He gives him an obvious look. “Of course.”

 

_____

 

After spending fifteen minutes talking on the bed, waiting a considerable amount of time that ensures that Sam must be well asleep in his bedroom, Dean starts rolling a joint, aware of the pair of blue eyes that watch how his hands work.

“Should I be worried about how well you do that?” Castiel asks, teasingly.

Dean grins and looks at him. “Nah.” He licks the paper and then looks back at the joint, allowing himself to admire his work. “Wanna share of should I roll another one?”

“I like sharing with you.”

Dean can’t help flushing slightly. He places the joint in between his lips and lights it up with his Zippo, immediately taking a toke. He closes his eyes and lets himself enjoy the sweet taste, exhaling and opening his eyes to see how the smoke floats out of his mouth. “Fuck,” he murmurs, tilting his head until he feels the wall on the back of his head. “I forgot how good it felt.”

He hands the joint to Cas and their fingers brush. He watches how his husband takes a toke and the pleased face he makes when he exhales. “You had a really great idea, Dean.”

Dean smiles and lets himself relax, pressing his shoulder against Cas’. “Not all my ideas are bad.” He sighs and closes his eyes, letting the smell to get into his nostrils; his frustration with his broken leg begins to disappear and he starts to feel a bubble of joy building in his chest.

Castiel lifts his hand, the one that has the joint in between its fingers, approaching it to Dean’s lips, and Dean inhales, filling his mouth with the hot and sweet smoke. The moment Cas gets his hand down, Dean cups Castiel’s face, leans closer and breathes the smoke into his husband’s mouth before he kisses him, sweetly, taking his time to taste Cas’ mouth mixed with the taste of the smoke. Castiel moans as he gets his free hand on Dean’s chest, fisting his _Star Wars_ t-shirt, pulling him closer.

By the time they pull away, both of them are grinning.

“I love it when you do that,” Castiel confesses.

“Of course you do.”

Castiel grins. “May I try?”

“Fuck yeah.”

Castiel lifts the joint to his lips and takes a generous toke. He puts his hand down, keeping it safely on top of his thigh. He leans closer, resting his other hand on Dean’s nape, his thumb rubbing up and down, and he breathes the smoke into Dean’s mouth before kissing him.

“How was it?” Castiel asks.

“Amazing,” Dean answers, still caressing Castiel’s stubble with his thumb. “You’ve always been a fast learner.” 

Castiel grins and pecks Dean’s lips. Then he sighs, contently and rests his temple against Dean’s. “I don’t understand why this is illegal.”

“It’s a drug and it creates addiction.”

“Sugar is also a drug and you have millions of companies using it in their products. They don’t give a damn if sugar creates addiction or if it develops tons of diseases like diabetes as long as they get their money. Studies have showed that sugar can be even more addictive than cocaine, but nobody does anything against it.”

Dean looks at him. “I don’t know, babe. The world’s messed up.” He grabs the joint and takes a toke, handing it to Cas once he lets out the sweet smoke. “Guess that if you have to smoke something, then it’s illegal. If you can drink it or eat it, it’s just okay. Nobody gives a fuck about the consequences.”

Castiel hums as he takes the last toke, then he looks at it before extinguish it. “Maybe we should go slower with the next one.”

Dean grins. “Yeah, probably.” He gets the weed and the paper and starts rolling another joint again. “We’re gonna start laughing like idiots any minute now or say deep philosophical stuff.” He chuckles and looks at Cas, who is grinning. “You’re way too happy now.”

Castiel chuckles. It’s different from the chuckle the Castiel he met on the fake 2014 universe Zachariah got him made, and it relieves Dean. That Castiel was wrong in all the ways. When he and Cas first smoked a joint together, Dean was afraid he would see that Castiel from 2014, but it was different. Zachariah just gave Dean a poor copy of the man he loves.

“Must be the pot,” Castiel says, smiling. “It takes all the worries away.”

“What’s worrying you, Cas?” Dean asks as he licks the paper.

“Your leg, for starters.” He looks at Dean, who flicks on his Zippo lighter again, and then he hands the joint to Cas, who puts it into his lips and inhales, softly, and then he gives it to Dean, who does the same motion. “I hate seeing you suffering.”

“It’s just broken bones. Takes time to heal, but they heal.” But Dean knows that it will come a time when his bones won’t heal because he will be too old. “At least it wasn’t anything like that hunt with the daevas. I lost too much blood that time.”

Castiel nods and closes his eyes, sighing.

“What’s the other thing that worries you?” Dean asks, watching him, noticing how Cas’ Adam apple bobs as he swallows.

“My memories.” He opens his eyes and looks at Dean, who can’t help making a worried face. “I’m doing good, but I can’t help panicking when I am aware that I forgot something.” He grabs the joint and takes another toke. Dean is about to say something when Castiel cups his face and breathes the smoke into his mouth before kissing him. “Let’s not talk about it now,” Castiel whispers into his mouth.

“Okay,” Dean murmurs back.

They keep kissing, sweetly and lazily, getting higher as time passes. Dean deepens the kiss, holding onto Cas as if he was a drowning man holding onto a lifesaver, not wanting to sink.

He pulls away and looks into Castiel’s eyes. “You have the most beautiful eyes I’ve ever seen, Cas,” Dean says. His fingers trace down Castiel’s temples, his thumbs brushing the crow’s feet of the ex-angel. “They’re like a sea with galaxies on them. I love them. I love it when you look at me with them.”

Castiel smiles. “I believe you are quite high, Dean.”

“Yeah, and so are you. But I mean it, Cas. I mean it.” He kisses him again, desperately.

 

_____

 

Dean gets tired of sitting on the couch and watching TV, so he decides to stand up and get to their bedroom and find something to read. He is more than used to the crutch, but he still hates it. At least he is now a little bit faster with it, but not so much.

The bunker is quiet. Sam went for a run while Castiel worked on the greenhouse. Dean envies them because they can do what they always do while he has to spend all his day sitting because he can’t do much. He cooks, but there are so many things he would love to do but he can’t, not yet. He still has some more weeks to wear the fucking plaster.

When he reaches their bedroom, he sees that the door is closed, which means that Cas might be inside it. He might have ended up covered in compost and decided to change his clothes; it wouldn’t be the first time.

Dean gets into their bedroom, without knocking and he looks around, waiting for Cas to be next to the wardrobe, changing his clothes, but he finds him sitting in front of the desk, with his journal open and with glassy eyes. He looks embarrassed and startled; he wasn’t expecting Dean.

“Cas,” Dean says, worried, because he knows the reason behind those tears. He walks as fast as he can towards Cas and Castiel buries his face in Dean’s stomach while Dean holds him. “I’m here, love, I’m here.” He tries to keep his voice sweet and calm, but it breaks him to see Cas like this; feeling how a part of his memory fades away and being unable to do anything against it. “I’m here. Don’t worry, I’m here, Cas. Just let the tears out. I’m not leaving, I’m here, beloved, I’m here.”

Castiel cries while he fists Dean’s t-shirt. Dean holds him with both of his hands, caressing Castiel’s hair. All his weight is on his good leg, which is something really uncomfortable, but he doesn’t give a fuck. Cas needs him, and nothing is going to avoid Dean from being next to him and calming him.

Eventually, Cas pulls away and wipes his face. “I’m sorry, I didn’t—” He looks at Dean, noticing he isn’t using his crutch, that he is still standing. “Oh, Dean, you shouldn’t be standing like this, you are only hurting yourself, you—”

“I don’t give a fuck, Cas.” He caresses his cheek and leans to kiss his forehead. “You need me. Screw the leg.”

“At least sit on the bed, Dean. Please.”

Dean sighs and rolls his eyes, but he does as he is told. He grabs the crutch and walks the small distance to the bed, sitting on it. “Happy?” he asks, sassily. Castiel sighs and then he approaches the chair to the edge of the bed, where Dean is sitting. Dean immediately holds Castiel’s hands and begins to caress them. He lifts one of his hands and cups Castiel’s face, feeling the warmth of his cheek and the wetness of it. “You should’ve told me you were gonna write.”

“I didn’t want to bother you.”

“You never bother me, Cas.” He looks at his eyes and they get glassy again. “I don’t want you to be alone. I don’t want you to suffer alone with this. We both know it can get scary. So don’t lock in here and cry alone, okay? I’m here for everything you need, Cas.”

Castiel lets out a shaky breath. “I am well aware of that, Dean. It’s just that you have too much with your leg and I didn’t want to add to your distress.”

“Cas,” Dean says, placing his other hand on Castiel’s face and making him look into his eyes. “Don’t ever think that there’s anything more important to me than you. If you need me, just tell me. You’re always with me when I need you. So please, don’t ever think for a second that you’re bothering, alright? I want to be with you when you need me.”

“Okay.” He nods and kisses Dean. “I love you.”

Dean smiles. “I love you, too.” He draws him closer and they hug. Castiel trembles slightly in his arms, but he calms when Dean tightens his arms around him. He kisses his temple and nuzzles it, and Castiel sighs. “Wanna go out or something to clear your mind? Maybe get some fresh air?”

“I just want you to hold me.”

“Then I’ll hold you, for as long as you need.”

Castiel fists the back of Dean’s plaid shirt and buries his face in the crook of Dean’s neck.

 

_____

 

The moment Cas closes the door of their bedroom door, Dean presses him against it and kisses him deeply, making Castiel moan, both pleased and surprised. Dean uses the hand he doesn’t have on the crutch to sneak it under Castiel’s t-shirt, and rubs his thigh against Castiel’s crotch.

“Dean—” Castiel moans as Dean mouths his jaw.

“Cas, it’s been so long since we last fucked,” Dean murmurs into Castiel’s skin. Since Dean got the plaster, they didn’t do anything sexual. Dean can’t do much with his leg immobilized and he knows Castiel didn’t want to do anything that would worsen his condition, but it’s been too long since the two of them did anything, and Dean craves for it, and judging how Castiel is already half hard with just some kisses, he must be dying to do it too. “And I can tell you need it as bad as I do.” He founds Castiel’s mouth and gives him a breathtaking kiss.

Castiel pulls away and looks at Dean with an arched brow. He is panting and flushed, and it only makes Dean harder in his pants. “You can’t move your leg, Dean.”

“Yeah, but we can do a few things that don’t require moving my leg,” Dean says, wiggling his eyebrows. He gets his hand on Castiel’s crotch and just presses, making Castiel moan and roll his hips.

“I could ride you,” Castiel moans, closing his eyes.

“Fuck yeah. “He cups his face and kisses him.

Getting to the bed is a bit complicated, because kissing while Dean uses his crutch isn’t the easiest task, but both of them are so desperate to get their hands on each other, that they don’t care about the clumsiness of the moment.

Carefully, Castiel helps Dean to lie on their bed; not even in the heat of the moment, the ex-angel is going to stop worrying about Dean’s well-being, which is something that makes Dean’s heart flutter with love.

When Dean is lying on the bed, Castiel lies on top of him, making sure that he doesn’t lie any weight on Dean’s plaster, and he kisses him, deeply and breathtakingly, and Dean feels like a drowned man who is finally able to breathe.

Dean can’t keep his hands still, he needs to touch his husband everywhere, to map his body, to remember by touch that glorious body he loves worshipping with everything he has. He is eager to feel Cas’ skin against his, so he immediately starts taking Castiel’s clothes off while they kiss, only pulling from his mouth when he gets rid of his t-shirt.

Taking Dean’s clothes takes a while, especially his jeans and underwear. The plaster makes things difficult, but Dean has been wearing it for so long that he and Cas know how they have to take the clothes off to avoid tearing them. They have to be careful and patient, but patience isn’t something they want to have tonight, still, they take said pieces of clothes slowly, and Dean sighs relieved when he feels the chill air of the bedroom on his cock.

Castiel cups his face and kisses him, rolling his hips, applying pressure to Dean’s groin. Both of them moan at the wonderful sensation, and Dean digs his nails on Cas’ scalp, matching the rhythm of his hips.

The ex-angel mouths his jaw as his hands trace down his sides, only to go up and rest his fingers on Dean’s nipples, moving in circles. It doesn’t take Castiel too long to use his teeth and tongue on one of Dean’s nipples, and Dean groans and moans, closing his eyes to focus on the feeling.

After that, Castiel gets his mouth around Dean’s cock. His lips wrap perfectly around the head and he swallows his length in one bob, helped by the thrust of Dean’s hips. Castiel moans around his cock and Dean can’t help wailing and moaning Cas’ name as the ex-angel gives him a few bobs, swirling his tongue around the shaft, leaving Dean breathless.

“Do you think you are going to be able to finger me?” Castiel asks with a smirk, after pulling away from Dean’s cock with a wet sound. “You are quite wrecked and we have just started.”

Dean glares him. “Fuck you, Cas.”

“That’s the plan, Dean.”

Dean rolls his eyes but chuckles. “Asshole.” He searches in the drawer for the lube and a condom while Castiel kneels, with Dean’s legs in between his. He spreads the lube on his hands, warming it, and then, he gets a finger inside Castiel, who makes a really loud moan. “Just one finger and you’re already wrecked,” he mocks, smirking.

“Assbutt.” He fucks into Dean’s finger, and Dean pulls it away, making Castiel groan in disappointment, but Dean soon adds a second one, and Castiel closes his eyes and moans, “Oh, Dean—”

Dean keeps fingering him, touching his prostrate almost every time, working up Castiel. He watches the wonderful faces he makes, making his cock twitch in anticipation. He finally pulls his fingers out after loosening Cas and he puts the condom on and lubes it, wiping his hand on the sheets.

Castiel gets his hands on Dean’s chest, caressing him while Dean starts to align himself with Castiel, holding him by his hips, making soothing circles on his hipbones. When he feels the head of his cock passing through the ring of muscles, Castiel takes it from there and takes Dean in one thrust, making both of them moan.

“Fuck, Cas—!” Dean moans.

“Dean— fuck, I missed this,” Castiel moans, tilting his chin to press it on his chest. His hands are restless, moving on Dean’s chest.

“Me too, Cas, me too.”

It takes a short moment for Castiel to adjust around Dean, and when he does, he starts rolling his hips and everything just explodes. Both of them turn into two messes of moans, holding each other as if they were afraid that they were going to burst into millions of pieces if they let go of each other.

Dean almost forgot how warm and tight Cas felt around him. He moans Castiel’s name as he rolls his hips, as best as he can, matching Castiel’s maddening rhythm. The ex-angel grinds onto Dean’s cock, fucking into Dean’s cock desperately. He tilts his head up and parts his lips, moaning Dean’s name over and over again while his hands keep touching Dean’s chest and shoulders.

“C’mere,” Dean moans, desperately as one of his hands slides up Castiel’s spine, making him lean onto him. “Kiss me, kiss me.”

And Castiel kisses him while he leans onto Dean, without stopping his movements. His hands find Dean’s and they lace their fingers together, resting their hands on each side of Dean’s head. They rest their foreheads together as they increase their pace. Dean thrusts harder, seeking for Castiel’s sweet spot, earning him a wonderful clench.

Dean comes, embarrassingly soon, moaning Castiel’s name. He would be ashamed for coming so soon if Cas wasn’t coming above him just seconds later after him. Their orgasms just hit them without any advice, but they don’t seem to mind.

They keep moving against each other until their releases are done, and then Castiel collapses on top of Dean, burying his face on Dean’s sweaty neck, breathing hard. Dean pants and closes his eyes as he smiles, happy and sated. He gives Cas’ hands a soft squeeze and feels Castiel’s smile against his skin. He kisses his neck and then he moves his face to kiss Dean’s lips, lazily.

“We shouldn’t stay so long without having sex,” Dean mumbles, letting himself get lost in the ocean of Castiel’s eyes.

“Then, I suggest you to stop getting injured,” Castiel sasses with a lovely smile.

“Dick.”

“Assbutt.” He grins and kisses him before he gets Dean out of him. “Let me clean us.”

Dean sighs. “Okay.”

Castiel pecks his lips and gets some wipes to clean his mess on both of them while Dean takes off the condom and knots it, throwing it to the bin, hoping it finds its target.

He watches how Cas cleans the two of them and he smiles. He reaches out and caresses his shoulder, earning him a beautiful smile from the ex-angel. When Cas is done cleaning them, he grabs Dean’s hand and kisses his palm, which makes Dean blush.

“Blush suits you, beloved,” Castiel says with a teasing smile.

“You’re the fucking worst, Cas.”

Castiel laughs, brightly, and he lies next to Dean, holding his hand and resting his head on Dean’s shoulder. He sighs, happily, and Dean kisses his hair. “Does your leg hurt?”

“No, don’t worry.” His thumb caresses Castiel’s palm, reassuring him. “I need to get rid of the plaster as soon as possible.”

Castiel rolls onto his side and cups Dean’s face before kissing him. “You are almost done with it. Just be patient.”

“It’s annoying.”

“I know.” He kisses him again, and Dean hums into it. “But it’s still necessary.”

Dean exhales sharply and looks at the plaster for a moment before he looks back at Castiel, who is tracing the anti-possession tattoo with his fingers. He smiles and gets his arm around Castiel’s shoulders, pulling him closer. His fingers brush Castiel’s hair, softly, and Castiel purrs.

“You sound like a cat,” Dean teases.

Castiel glares him and then rolls his eyes. “Always with the terrible jokes.”

“I’m hilarious.”

“I will never understand how you have such an overrated opinion of your sense of humor.”

Dean tries to kick him, but the plaster doesn’t allow him to do so, something that Castiel notices and which makes him smile in victory. “Son of a bitch. Fucking plaster,” Dean groans. “Cut it out with that smug face of yours.”

Castiel grins and gets half of him on top of Dean. “You are adorable when you are frustrated,” he says before kissing him.

“I fucking hate you.”

“Sure, Dean.” He smiles and kisses him again.

Dean cups his face as they kiss, enjoying the taste of Castiel’s mouth and the feeling of their bodies pressed together. He kisses him sweetly but breathtakingly, opening his mouth to let his tongue find Castiel’s, both of them moaning into the kiss. It doesn’t take too long for Dean to get half-hard, and naturally, Castiel feels it.

“Really, Dean?” Castiel asks, with an arched brow and a smirk.

Dean smirks back. “You’re really arousing, Cas.”

Castiel chuckles.

“Want a second round?” He rolls his hips, brushing his half-hard cock against Castiel’s, and Castiel closes his eyes and bites his lower lip. “Maybe we can last a little bit more than before.” He gets his lips on Castiel’s earlobe and sucks.

“Dean—” Castiel moans, trembling above Dean.

“You think you can fuck me?”

Castiel pulls away and looks at him, studying how he can do it in order to not make Dean’s bad leg move. “Roll onto your left side,” he finally says, moving to the empty spot of their bed.

Dean does as he is told and lies on his left side. “You’re gonna fuck me from behind?”

Castiel places behind Dean and kisses his neck. “Yes. Are you comfortable?”

“Yeah. We can do it like this.” The plaster is still annoying, but he can take it like this. “But first,” he says as he rolls onto his back and gets his hand on Castiel’s cock, squeezing the head of it and making Castiel moan. “Let me do this.”

“Dean—”

Dean pumps him, hot and steady, getting Cas harder with his fist. The ex-angel moans and closes his eyes, rolling his hips to match the rhythm of Dean’s hand, fucking into his fist. Dean watches him and feels his cock twitch at the sight of Castiel, taken by the pleasure. Dean loves it.

In the blink of an eye, Castiel moves on top of Dean and kisses him, deeply and sweetly, cupping his face. Even when he pulls away, Dean chases him, desperate to feel their lips sealed one more time, and Castiel happily complies, smiling into the kiss.

“Roll onto your side, Dean,” Castiel whispers into his mouth before moving to the empty side of the bed. Dean does as he is told and lies onto his left side. It’s not the most comfortable position, but this way, the plaster doesn’t bother him too much. “Are you comfortable?” Castiel asks as he kisses Dean’s neck.

“Yeah.”

Castiel brings his hands to Dean’s injured leg and moves it until part of it rests on the mattress instead of on Dean’s other leg. “This way you won’t hurt your other leg.”

Dean grins. “You’re always thinking about me first.”

He feels Castiel’s smile against the skin behind his ear. “Of course.”

Castiel keeps kissing his neck while one of his tanned hands caresses Dean’s chest, using his fingers to pinch and rub Dean’s nipple. Dean can’t help moaning and tilting his head. He rolls his hips, slowly, wanting to feel Cas’ hardness against his ass, and also wanting to tease his husband just a little, which works, given the muffled moan Castiel makes.

Eventually, Castiel shuffles and gets a condom and the lube. It doesn’t take too long after that for him to start fingering Dean to lose him up. Dean moans at the familiar burn of Cas’ fingers inside him, stretching him and teasing his prostate. Cas is always delicate and sweet with it, and he always presses several kisses on Dean while he fingers him.

When Cas has four fingers in, he brushes Dean’s prostate and then pulls them away. He kisses the side of Dean’s freckled neck and presses his tanned chest against Dean’s back.

“Are you ready?” Castiel asks.

“Been ready for a while, Cas,” Dean teases, turning his face to look at Castiel.

“Assbutt.” He rolls his eyes, but he pecks Dean’s lips.

He aligns himself against Dean and starts to push inside, making both of them moan at the feeling. It doesn’t matter how many times they do it; it always feels awesome for the two of them.

When Castiel is fully inside Dean, both of them let out a sigh. Dean rests one of his hands on Castiel’s thigh, caressing it, while Castiel gets both hands on Dean’s torso. The moment he feels that Dean has adjusted around him, Castiel starts rolling his hips.

Dean tries to match the rhythm of Castiel’s hips as best as he can. The position and the plaster don’t allow him to do much, but he still manages to meet Castiel’s thrusts in the middle. Dean moans, loudly, closing his eyes and parting his lips as Castiel fucks him and kisses his neck.

The angle isn’t the best, and it takes Castiel a little to find the perfect one and slide all the way in to touch Dean’s prostate, but when he does it, everything just clicks together. They rock together, slowly but steady, panting and moaning, never letting their grip go of each other. Castiel kisses his shoulder and the side of his neck, moaning into Dean’s skin, saying Dean’s name over and over again.

Dean tilts up his head again and digs his nails on Castiel’s beefy thighs, turning the tanned skin white under the pressure. Castiel’s hands don’t stop moving on his torso, restless to touch and to stroke him, and Dean presses closer against Castiel’s chest.

There is a moment when Castiel increases his pace and buries his face on Dean’s neck. Dean clenches around him, both moaning loudly when Cas’ cock touches that sweet spot and Dean clenches tightly around him. Dean gets his hand on Castiel’s hand and they lace their fingers before Castiel tenses around him and comes with a broken moan, Dean following him only a second later, painting his belly.

When they are done, their bodies give up and they just pant, together, still pressed against each other. Dean brings Castiel’s hand to his lips and kisses his knuckles, earning him a sweet nuzzle on his jaw and a content sigh.

He pulls away and gets rid of the condom, abandoning Dean’s back. While Cas does so, Dean lies onto his back, getting more comfortable. Cas lies next to him and cups his face, kissing him, sweetly and tenderly, making Dean feel as if he was floating on a cloud.

“That was awesome,” Dean murmurs, looking at Castiel’s beautiful blue eyes.

Castiel hums. “Yes, it truly was.” He kisses him again, both of them smiling. “Although it needed more kisses.”

“Agree.” He grins and kisses him again, humming into it as he cups his face. “When was the last time we did it twice in a row?”

Castiel makes a thoughtful face. He rolls onto his side and leans his chin on Dean’s freckled shoulder. “I think it was in our honeymoon.” His hand moves down to Dean’s chest, seeking his hand, and Dean meets him halfway, intertwining their fingers.

Dean nods. “Yeah, we did it a lot during that week.” He can’t help grinning at the memory of he and Cas in the California house, making love every night, kissing every chance they got. “We also did it four times one night.”

Castiel chuckles, his cheeks acquiring a lovely blush. “That was a really exhausting night. But it was incredible.”

“Yeah, it was.” He leans his face on Castiel’s head and sighs. He looks at their hands, which happen to be the ones with their rings and he lifts them.

“What?” Castiel asks, frowning.

Dean simply smiles and meets Castiel’s eyes. “Nothing. Just that I love you.”

Castiel grins, beautifully, and Dean’s heart skips a beat. “I love you, too, Dean.” He leans and kisses him.

When they pull away, Dean moves his arm to get it around Castiel’s shoulders and using his other hand to hold Castiel’s hand. Castiel snuggles against him and sighs happily. Dean grins and kisses the top of Castiel’s head.

They fall asleep easily.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Weed smoking


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading, for the kudos, the comments, the bookmarks and the subscriptions :)
> 
>  **IMPORTANT:** I have finals coming, so I won't be able to update until **September the 10th** , a week later than my usual updating time. Sorry for that.

“Good morning, sunshine,” Dean says as he lies on top of Castiel and begins to kiss him.

Castiel doesn’t have time to protest about Dean’s morning energy, and any kind of sassy comment gets muffled in the kiss and Castiel lets himself go and kisses Dean while he gets his arms around his neck, pulling Dean closer.

Dean cups Castiel’s face and deepens the kiss, loving how Castiel melts under him. He even gets his legs around Dean, to hold him against him. Even if Cas is quite awake now, Dean knows that he is going to try to make him linger in bed for as long as possible. Not that Dean complains; he loves being in bed with Cas, especially when they make out.

“Good morning, Dean,” Castiel says when they pull away in order to breathe. He caresses Dean’s hair and Dean leans into his touch. “You are not planning on leaving bed already, are you?” He tightens his legs around Dean’s body, and gives him a challenging look.

Dean chuckles. “I was planning on making out for a little while.” He cups his face, loving the feeling of Cas’ stubble under his palms and kisses him, passionately and tenderly. “Does that sound good to you?”

“It sounds perfect, Dean.”

They both grin and keep kissing, holding each other as they do so. Dean loves mornings like this, when the two of them can kiss and touch and take all their time, without needing to do anything sexual. He loves kissing Cas, it’s one of his favorite things to do. Cas is an amazing kisser, and all their kisses feel awesome. If he could, he would spend the whole day just kissing Cas.

There are moments when they pull away, to get some needed air, and they look at each other, grinning. Dean caresses Castiel’s hair, which will soon need a cut, and just looks at him, feeling so happy to just be with him.

They keep kissing for a while, until Dean’s stomach and also Castiel’s, start groaning, asking them to get some breakfast, so they pull away, although Dean steals a quick kiss from Castiel’s lips, something that makes Castiel laugh, filling the room with joy.

“What do you want for breakfast?” Dean asks as he stretches next to the bed. His healed leg feels amazing now that he got rid of the plaster three days ago. “Apart from coffee,” he adds, aware that that was what Cas was going to say.

Castiel gives him a sassy look, annoyed that he can’t be sassy. “I want some bacon.”

Dean grins. “Awesome. With scrambled eggs?”

“Yes, please.”

They begin to make their bed and then, they put on their robes and head to the kitchen. Dean gets his arm around Castiel’s shoulders and kisses his temple. Castiel smiles and places his hand on the small of Dean’s back.

When they arrive to the kitchen, Sam is already in there, sitting around the table, almost done with his coffee and looking at his laptop.

“Good morning, guys,” Sam says, without taking his eyes from the screen.

“Good morning, Sam,” Dean and Castiel say.

As Dean starts to get the pans and the food, Castiel begins to prepare coffee for the three of them. Even if Sam has already had his coffee, he can’t say no to the coffee Cas makes. Cas makes the best coffee.

“Want some bacon, Sammy?” Dean asks, looking at his brother.

“No, thank you. But I want some scrambled eggs,” Sam answers. “I guess Cas is gonna make something with fruit, right?”

“Yes. Would you like me to make you some yogurt with cornflakes and berries?” Castiel asks, without removing his attention from the coffee machine.

“That’d be amazing. Thanks, Cas.”

“Want one, Dean?”

“Yeah, but without yogurt,” Dean says. He doesn’t like the taste of yogurt.

“You hate the taste, I know.” He passes next to him, to grab the cornflakes, and presses a kiss on Dean’s nape.

“I might have found us a case,” Sam says. “Could be a shapeshifter.”

Dean simply hums, absently. He woke up in a really good mood, but hearing that Sam found them a case just brings his mood down.

“Where?” Castiel asks.

“Patterson, New Jersey,” Sam answers. He begins to read the news out loud, but Dean barely pays attention to what his brother is saying.

Dean looks at the bacon, only focusing on the crispy sound it makes. His mind is rambling about something he has been avoiding, but he knows he will have to make a choice sooner or later.

“Dean?” Castiel asks, placing his hand on his shoulder, making Dean snap out of his train of thought. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah. I’m fan-freaking-tastic,” Dean says, with what he hopes is a convincing pout, but he can see in Cas’ eyes that he knows that something is going on with Dean. He clears his throat and says, “We should check it out.”

 

_____

 

The hunt turns to be one of the simplest ones, but still, Cas ends up with a wound on his chest, nothing too serious, but it still makes Dean anxious about it. Dean and Sam got lucky and only ended up with a couple of bruises.

Castiel looks at the backseat, where Sam is sleeping and then he looks at Dean. “Do you want to talk?” Castiel asks.

Dean knows he is testing the waters. He knows that Cas has been aware about his mood. Dean has been trying to hide it during the whole hunt, but Cas knows him so well. “Not really,” Dean finally says.

Castiel exhales, sharply, and leans against the window. “Fine.”

Dean’s grip on the steering wheel tightens, but he doesn’t say a word. He knows Cas is upset, and irritated with him, but Dean really doesn’t want to talk about it right now. He just wants to get back to the bunker and rest and sleep next to his husband, who is a bit mad at him.

“How’s your wound going?” Dean asks, trying to move on from the previous topic.

“Just going,” Castiel answers. “It still stings.”

The green eyed hunter sighs. “Yeah, I know.” He feels his eyes getting glassy and he fights against the urge of letting any tear out.

“Don’t worry about it. It’s not my worst wound.”

Cas is right; he has been worse. “I can’t help it.”

“I know.” He offers him a tender smile and squeezes his thigh. “You always worry too much about the ones you love. That’s one of the many things I love about you.”

Dean huffs and rolls his eyes. “You’re a fucking sap, Cas.” He smiles, but there’s some melancholy in it. “But I love that about you. Even if I complain about it.”

“I know, Dean.”

 

_____

 

Castiel is sleeping soundly next to Dean, who has his arm around his back, keeping him close to him. His fingers move on his shoulders, caressing him softly, hoping he won’t wake up. His breathing is even and soft, and its sound calms Dean. His hand is on Dean’s chest, his fingers brushing the place where Dean’s heart is, almost as if he was protecting it.

Dean sighs in the silence of their bedroom. The ceiling is almost dark, only lightened by the lamp they keep on. It is a shame the bunker doesn’t have any windows.

Suddenly, Castiel stirs and opens his eyes, meeting Dean’s.

“Hey,” Dean says, greeting him with a smile.

“Hello,” Castiel says with a sleepy voice. He looks at the clock, seeing that it is somewhere around two A.M. and frowns. “Can’t sleep?”

Dean shakes his head. “No.”

“Your mind doesn’t shut up?” he asks, really worried. His hand on Dean’s chest begins to move, caressing him, soothingly. Cas knows that using his touch calms Dean.

Dean nods. “Yeah, but it’s not because of the same old shit about not being good enough for you.” He sighs and looks at the ceiling, as if he was going to be able to find the courage to say what he was thinking about in that place. He turns his face and looks at Cas. “I wanna quit, Cas.”

Castiel lifts himself a little, until he and Dean are eye to eye. “You want to quit what?”

“Hunting.”

Castiel blinks, perplexed. He remains silent for a few seconds, letting the information sink in. “Are you serious?”

“Yeah.” He nods and gets his hand on top of Cas’, holding it. “I don’t wanna do it anymore. We’re getting too old for it, Cas, and every time we go on a hunt, the chances of dying increase, and I— I don’t want any of us to end like that. I just wanna live the rest of what we got left living without any risks, just living a normal live, and being together.” He takes a deep breath, feeling the wetness in his eyes. “It’s not that I don’t wanna save people, I still want to, but the price is getting higher and I can’t— I don’t—” He shreds some tears and sighs, a bit embarrassed. “I just want to live with you and grow old together, without worrying about dying in a hunt.”

“I would like that, too, Dean,” Castiel says, with glassy eyes.

“Do you?”

“Yes, Dean.” He kisses him, softly and sweetly, and something heavy in Dean’s chest lifts and disappears, letting him to relax again.

“So, do you think we can do it?”

“Yes, of course. Why do you even ask?”

Dean takes a deep breath and his hold on Castiel’s hand tightens. “Last time I tried to have a normal life, it didn’t work out well.”

“That’s because you didn’t really want to quit.”

“Yeah, probably. But I’m scared I might fuck it up.”

Castiel cups his face. “You won’t”

“How are you so sure?” Dean asks, with a trembling voice.

“You have been scared of fucking it up since we got together and look at us.” He smiles and caresses Dean’s cheekbone. “We are happily married and discussing about having a normal life. We’ve been together for so many years and nothing has pulled us apart. We are still together and happy. You haven’t fucked it up. And you won’t.”

Dean sobs and kisses him, holding him in a tight embrace. “You’re the fucking best, Cas.”

“Thank you, Dean. That is a really nice compliment.” He steals a quick kiss from his lips, leaving Dean with a soft smile on his face. “You are the fucking best as well.”

“Sap.”

Castiel grins.

“I’m glad you wanna quit, too,” Dean confesses.

“I’m glad that you want to,” Castiel says. “For how long have you been thinking about it?”

“Before I got my leg broken.” His confessions makes Castiel lift both of his eyebrows. “I— I didn’t say anything because I had to think about it and I was delaying thinking about it, but this last hunt just made me realize that I wanna quit.”

Castiel nods. “And what else have you been thinking about?”

“I’ve been thinking about moving to California, to that wonderful house we have, and find some jobs, because we can’t always live from credit card fraud and hustling at pool, y’know? We could build a life there and be happy, just the two of us. Just having an ordinary life.”

“That sounds extraordinary.”

Dean grins and kisses him. “Yeah, it does.” He takes a deep breath. “I just hope Sam doesn’t get mad at us for wanting to do that.”

“I don’t think he will.” He nuzzles his nose, making Dean grin. “We’ll talk about this tomorrow, okay? Now let’s get some sleep, Dean.”

“Okay.” He kisses him. “I love you.”

“I love you.”

 

_____

 

“Can we talk to you, Sammy?” Dean asks as he and Castiel get into the library room.

Sam gives them a confused look, but he nods. “Sure.”

Dean and Castiel sit in front of him. Dean gives Castiel a look, telling him that he is nervous and anxious, but Castiel grabs his hand and gives him a reassuring squeeze. It is amazing how much Cas’ touches can relax Dean.

He feels his mouth getting drier with every second that passes. His beating heart is like a hammer against his chest, but Cas is there with him, holding his hand, sitting closer to Dean than he should, because he wants to give Dean all his support.

“Listen,” Dean begins to say, clearing his throat. He doesn’t know how Sam can react to their plan of retiring, and that scares the hell out of him. His hazel eyes only make Dean feel more anxious about it, and Cas gives him another squeeze. “Cas and I have talked and we—” He clears his throat again. Once this conversation is done, he is going to drink anything he can find. “And we have decided that it’s time for us to quit hunting and live a normal life.”

Surprise fills the younger Winchester’s eyes for a moment, but them he makes an agreement pout. “Okay.”

Dean frowns. That was really easy. “Okay? You find it okay?”

Sam chuckles. “Yeah, Dean, I do.”

Castiel frowns as well. “You sound almost as if you were expecting us to do this.”

“Kind of.” He shrugs, and Dean and Castiel share a brief look of confusion. “Look, I’m younger than you two and I’m already ending up beaten after every hunt. I’ve been thinking about quitting, because, let’s be real, it won’t take us too long to end up killed by a monster. We don’t have the same strength, reflexes and energy as we did five years ago, so we should let the next generation of hunters to take our place.”

“Why didn’t you say anything before?” Dean asks.

“Because I thought you still wanted to keep hunting. And even though Cas is one of the best hunters I know, you two sometimes need a backup, ‘cause anything can go wrong.”

Both Dean and Castiel look at Sam in acknowledgement.

“So,” Sam continues, getting a bit more comfortable on his chair. “Have you guys planned this?”

“Yes,” Castiel answers. “We would like to move to the California house and find some job in the town.”

“Yeah, ‘cause we’ll have to pay for stuff,” Dean adds, with a smirk. “Do you have any plans, Sammy?”

“Some. I would like to study something while I work with animals, y’know? I think that would make me really happy.”

“Then go for it, Sam.”

“I will.” Sam smiles. “Have you thought when you’re gonna move out?”

“As soon as possible,” Castiel says, giving Dean a sweet smile that the green eyed man returns.

 

_____

 

Sam decides to remain in the bunker while he searches for a place where he can work and study. Both Dean and Cas told him that he could stay in the house with them, but Sam refused, saying that he also needs to find someone to take care of the bunker.

It feels strange to part from his brother. A long time ago, Dean would have felt terrible about it, he would have fought against anything to get his brother with him, but at this moment, he doesn’t feel any of that. He is a bit sad about parting, but they are going to still see each other and call each other. They both want to start a new life, because after everything, they deserve it, and they both want different things. A long time ago, Dean would have been mad about that, but right now, he understands it and he is fine with it.

Castiel gives Sam a big and tight hug. Sam says something to Cas that only the ex-angel can hear, and he whispers something into Sam’s ear, some words that make Sam smile when they pull away. Sam claps Cas’ shoulder and Castiel smiles in gratitude.

Dean hugs his brother tightly, feeling emotional about this, and he can tell by his brother’s hug that he isn’t the only one feeling emotional about the whole thing.

“I bet you’re glad about getting rid of me,” Dean jokes.

“Not even close,” Sam says. “I’ll miss you.”

“Yeah, I’ll miss you, too.”

“Take care, okay?” He sighs, shakily, almost as if he was fighting back tears. “You got everything you’ve ever wanted. Don’t lose it.”

“I won’t.” He pulls away and looks at his brother, with glassy eyes. “And you better find that place you’re looking for and go for it, alright? It’s time for you too to find happiness.”

Sam chuckles. “I will.” He takes a step back and looks at them. “Drive safe.”

“We will call you once we are there, Sam,” Castiel says. He places his hand on the small of Dean’s back, rubbing soothing circles, and Dean leans into the touch. “See you soon.”

“Yeah, see you soon, Sammy.”

“See you soon, guys.”

Dean and Castiel walk towards the Impala and get into it. They hired a moving company to get all their stuff to their house, so the Impala is only carrying a couple of duffel bags with clothes. It is going to be a long drive, but it is going to be the last long drive.

Dean looks at the rearview mirror to see his brother. He shakes his hand, and Sam shakes it too. Dean sighs and starts the car, rolling the Impala through the tunnel. It doesn’t take them too long to reach the place outside the bunker, and both Dean and Castiel look at the building one more time. A piece of them is left forever in that place, in the shape of initials. So many wonderful things happened there, and some other terrible ones. It became their home when they didn’t have one, but now it is time to go to their real home, the one they have been dreaming about for a really long time.

“Are you okay?” Castiel asks as he places his hand on top of Dean’s.

“Yeah, just feeling nostalgic,” Dean answers, looking at Castiel’s eyes. He sighs, happily, because Cas is with him, and as long as they are together, Dean will be home. “We’ve lived so many things in there.”

“Yes, we have,” Castiel says, emotion filling his voice; Dean isn’t the only one feeling nostalgic. “I’m going to miss it.”

“Me too.”

“But I can’t wait to live more amazing things in our new home.”

Dean chuckles. “Such a fucking sap.”

“You love it.” He leans and presses a brief kiss on his lips.

Dean hums. “I’m glad we’re doing this.”

“Me too.”

Dean looks away from Cas’ eyes, redirecting his sight to the road. “Well, let’s go home.”

 

_____

 

It takes them two days to get to California. They slept in a motel to get some rest during the night and the morning after they went back to the road and drove the remaining distance.

By the time they get there, the moving company hasn’t gotten there yet, so Dean and Castiel grab the few things they carried in the trunk and enter their home. The last time they were there was during Christmas, and everything remains the same, only that dustier. Dean stands in the entrance, looking at everything while Castiel drops the keys in the bowl and takes some steps, towards the staircase, but when he notices that Dean isn’t following, he looks at him and frowns.

“Dean, is something wrong?”

Dean shakes his head. “No, Cas. Nothing’s wrong. I’m just trying to let the reality of this to sink in.”

His words don’t make Castiel’s concern fade and the ex-angel walks towards Dean and cups his face, Dean immediately leaning onto the touch. “Something is worrying you, beloved.”

Dean shakes his head again before he presses his forehead against Castiel’s. “I still can’t believe I’m able to have this, y’know? That I’m allowed to have a life I’ve always dreamt about. It feels… strange. Like I’m gonna wake up and nothing of this is gonna be real.”

“It is real, Dean.” He grabs Dean’s hand and places it on his chest, Dean feeling the beating of Castiel’s heart. He smiles at that.

Dean grins. “Yeah.” He looks at his husband’s blue eyes and kisses him, softly, taking his time to enjoy the moment, only pulling away when they hear the sound of tires against the ground. Both of them turn their faces to look at the moving van approaching the house. “Just in time.”

“Give me your bag,” Castiel says, taking Dean’s duffel bag from his hand. “I’ll leave them on the bedroom and then I’ll help you with the boxes.” He steals a quick kiss from Dean’s lips before leaving his side, carrying their duffel bags upstairs.

Dean walks out of the house and towards the van that it is carrying all their stuff. They filled boxes with clothes and stuff they have been acquiring during all these past years, like books, art supplies that belong to Cas, Dean’s guitar, photos, music, movies, kitchen utensils… A bit of everything. Dean could have never thought he was going to be able to put so many things that belonged to him in so many boxes. Living in the road constantly meant not being able to have anything more than clothes and a couple of souvenirs, nothing fancy. All his belongings had to fit in a duffel bag, and that reduced the amount of things he could own.

Castiel comes to help by the time Dean is grabbing the first box to put it inside the house. With his help and the guy from the moving company, all boxes are quickly put inside the house. The man leaves after the last box is placed on the living room’s floor, leaving Dean and Cas alone to put its contents in the house.

“We should also go to the supermarket to buy food and anything else we might need,” Dean says as he cuts open a box that it is marked with Cas’ handwriting and says ‘clothes’.

“We can do that tomorrow,” Castiel says. He is opening the box marked as kitchen by Dean’s handwriting. “We have to place all of this, and by the time we are done, I don’t think anyone of us would want to go to the supermarket.” He looks at Dean, with an obvious look.

Dean smirks. “Yeah. We should grab something for supper, though.”

“We can drive to town and have some take-out.”

“Great.”

Castiel nods and grabs some kitchen utensils and stands up. “Should I leave them on the counter so you can be the one who places them? You are quite maniac about where the kitchen stuff must go.”

Dean rolls his eyes, but he smiles. “Just grab another box that doesn’t say kitchen.”

Castiel nods and puts back what he grabbed inside the box. “Yes, I should.”

It takes them many hours to finally get everything in order. They don’t have a lot, but they have many stuff. Luckily, the two of them know where to put everything, except for the kitchen stuff, which is Dean’s job to place said stuff because he likes order in the kitchen.

The last thing to get placed is their clothes. Soon, the big wardrobe and the drawers are filled with their clothes, and Dean walks towards the door that leads to the balcony to take a deep breath and let himself relax after the long drive and the long job of placing everything where it now belongs.

Spring has come, and the weather is soft, but sometimes some cool air blows. Dean is wearing his dark Henley shirt and it warms him against the chilly temperature. He looks at the tress and the tiny glimpses of the sea in the horizon. Suddenly, Cas hugs him from behind, pressing his chest against Dean’s back, placing his hands on Dean’s chest and resting his chin on Dean’s shoulder. Dean lifts his hand and catches one of Castiel’s, using his thumb to caress his skin. He leans his head onto Castiel’s, and both smile.

“Hey, Cas.”

“Hello, Dean.” He kisses his neck and Dean’s smile widens. “It feels good to be home, doesn’t it?”

“Fuck yeah.” He turns his face to dedicate him a big grin before pressing a kiss on his temple. Then, they look at the beautiful landscape for a few minutes, enjoying the silence and being pressed together. “We should grab our supper, don’t you think?”

“I was starting to think it was taking you too long to say that.”

Dean turns around and glares him, pretending to be mad, but he can’t when Cas has that beautiful smile on his lips. “You are a dick.”

“And you are an assbutt.”

Both grin and kiss before going downstairs to get in the Impala and drive to the town to get some food.

 

_____

 

“You still got some energy left?” Dean asks with a rogue smile. He grabs Castiel by his hips and pulls him closer, which catches Castiel by surprise and he instinctively reaches for Dean’s shoulders. “I was thinking about celebrating that we’re settled in our new home.”

Castiel frowns at first, but comprehension quickly fills his face. “I think I have enough energy to have sexual intercourse with you, Dean.”

Dean rolls his eyes, as dramatic as he can be, not missing Castiel’s amused smile. “Stop calling it that, it sounds awful.”

“But it is enjoyable to tease you.” He leans closer, almost brushing their lips. One of his hands caresses Dean’s sandy hair and Castiel watches the motion for an instant before returning his eyes to Dean’s. He smiles. “You want to make love to me, Dean?”

Dean grins. “Yeah, you sap.”

Castiel simply smiles and removes the tiny inches that were left in between their lips and they kiss, holding each other in their arms. It starts as sweetly, almost innocent, but it grows hotter and more passionate with every minute, until Dean opens his mouth and lets Cas’ tongue in, which makes the two of them moan.

They pull away to get some air, grinning and looking at each other. Castiel hooks his fingers in the loops of Dean’s jeans and starts to walk backwards, guiding them to the bed, Dean letting himself being dragged. The ex-angel sits on the mattress and Dean kneels onto it, with Cas’ body in between his legs. He leans down and Castiel meets him in the middle to kiss him, their hands on each other, touching everywhere they can reach and taking off their clothes.

They have to break the kiss to get rid of their t-shirts. Dean takes Castiel’s off and then Castiel takes Dean’s off. Dean grins and cups Castiel’s face and just looks at him. Castiel looks at him, like he always does when Dean’s gaze lands on his. His tanned hands rest on Dean’s shoulders, his palm landing where the handprint used to be, and they keep staring at each other. Dean has never been good with words, but his eyes have always managed to say what words couldn’t. And Cas has learnt the language of his green eyes, and speaks it perfectly, just like Dean speaks the language of Castiel’s blue eyes.

Dean sighs and smiles, an overwhelming feeling spreading from his heart to the rest of his body. And he knows that Cas is feeling the same. They kiss again, once again speaking what they both know with gestures, never letting their hands go from each other.

Castiel’s hands map Dean’s chest, his fingers brushing Dean’s nipples, making Dean moan into their fervent kiss. They are taking things nice and slow, but Dean needs to get rid of his jeans and boxers, because it is getting too tight. He pulls away, immediately missing the feel of Cas’ lips on his. He stands up, in front of his husband, who looks at him with a frown that quickly disappears when he sees that Dean is opening the fly of his jeans. Before Dean can unzip them completely, Castiel snatches his hands and starts taking off Dean’s jeans.

“I know you love it more when I’m the one undressing you,” Castiel says, with an obvious look.

Dean chuckles. It is true. He loves it when Cas takes off his clothes. And he is aware that Cas also loves it when Dean is the one taking off his clothes.

The ex-angel is quick at removing both the jeans and the boxers. Dean kicks them out of his legs and steps closer, wanting to remove Castiel’s, but the blue eyed man grips Dean’s hips tightly and keeps him in place so he can swallow Dean’s cock.

“Fuck, Cas—”

Dean closes his eyes and feels the wetness and warmth of Castiel’s mouth. His hands immediately come to rest on Castiel’s hair, pushing himself a little bit deeper, feeling Castiel’s moan around his cock. When he opens his eyes, he looks down and finds Castiel, looking at him, with his nose buried in the golden curls of Dean’s crotch. He starts swirling his tongue around the shaft, and Dean wails and moans. The ex-angel bobs his head, quickly and nicely, to get Dean harder. It is quick, but so damn good. He pulls with a wet sound and smiles at Dean, who doesn’t know how he is still able to be standing.

“C’mere,” Dean says, grabbing Castiel’s arms and helping him to stand up.

The moment Castiel is in front of him, Dean kisses him, breathtakingly, as his hands work on his jeans and boxers, pulling them down in less than ten seconds. Castiel kicks them away and gets his arms around Dean’s neck, pulling him closer. Dean’s hands reach the back of Castiel’s thick thighs and he lifts his legs a little. The message comes clear to Castiel, because he hops and gets his legs around Dean’s hips, Dean holding him tightly.

The bed is a few inches from where they stand, but they both enjoy doing this. Dean walks the small distance, carrying Castiel, and then drops him onto the bed, delicately, breaking the kiss. Both of them grin, and chuckle at that before they go back to kissing, pressing their bodies together.

Dean deepens the kiss, and Castiel arches his back and wraps his legs around Dean’s, his soles caressing Dean’s shin. Dean smiles into the kiss and then pulls away to start a trail of kisses on Castiel’s body, although he spends a lot of time kissing Cas’ jawline before he moves down to his neck and chest.

When he reaches Castiel’s cock, he wraps his lips and swallows him, wanting to give him a quick and nice blowjob, like the one Castiel gave him a few minutes ago. Castiel moans and his whole body arches when Dean gets the head of his cock against his throat. Dean loves blowing Castiel, the feeling of his long and thick cock on his tongue, and he loves how Cas responds to it, the way his breath hitches, how his body arches and becomes restless, how he tugs at Dean’s hair, how he moans Dean’s name… Dean just loves it.

Dean pulls away after a few bobs and meets Castiel in a sweet kiss. Castiel’s hands are restless on Dean’s hair while Dean’s are restless on Castiel’s sides. They roll they hips together, applying pleasure on each other, rubbing their hard and leaking cocks. They should get to it, so Dean moves his hand towards the drawer, looking for a condom and the lube.

“No condom, Dean,” Castiel murmurs with a low and breathy voice.

“Alright,” Dean says with a smile before kissing Castiel.

He drops the condom back inside the drawer as they kiss. Then, he pulls away and lubes his fingers and his cock before getting one of his fingers inside Castiel, opening him up slowly. They kiss while he does that, adding one finger at a time, until Castiel is trembling under him when he has four fingers inside him, brushing his prostate. Dean likes teasing him, but Castiel sucks into his bottom lip as they kiss and Dean knows that Cas doesn’t want more teasing, so he pulls his fingers out of him, wipes them on the sheets and settles in between Castiel’s legs.

Castiel gets his legs around Dean’s hips and pulls him down, which always makes Dean grin. He rests his hands on Castiel’s hipbones, lifting him just enough so he can align his cock with Castiel’s hole. The tight ring of muscles easily gives away and Dean slides inside his husband, whose hands are on Dean’s blades. Dean leans closer, until his and Castiel’s foreheads are pressed together, breathing into each other. Without the condom, it feels more intense, warmer, tighter, and Dean loves it.

They kiss when Dean is buried inside Castiel. Dean lifts his hands so they can cup Castiel’s face. Castiel moves his hands and places them on top of Dean, linking their fingers together. Dean moves their joined hands so they can rest them together on the pillow and he pulls away from the kiss, looking at Cas with a bright smile. And then, he starts to move.

Dean grinds his hips, keeping a quick but sweet pace, Castiel meeting him in between. Castiel tightens his legs around Dean, pulling him closer and leaning to kiss him. For a moment, Dean loses his rhythm, but drives back inside of him easily, slamming the headboard against the wall, earning him one of those wonderful loud moans Castiel does, clenching around Dean so tight, that once again, Dean loses his rhythm, but thrusts back inside Castiel with the same energy, driving the two of them insane.

They keep holding hands, tightening the grip when the pleasure reaches those overwhelming levels they both love. Dean begins to kiss Castiel’s jaw, neck, mouth and everywhere he can reach. His pace increases, feeling the heat building in his belly. It only takes him a few thrusts to come inside Cas, falling apart onto him. He keeps thrusting in and out of his husband, and Castiel comes, burying his face against Dean’s jawline, his body tensing and arching with his release.

Dean drops onto Cas, boneless, and buries his face on the curve of his neck, trying to recover his breathing. Castiel gets his arms around Dean and holds him tightly, breathing hard, desperate to catch some air.

Eventually, Dean moves a little, just enough to reach Cas’ lips and kiss him, sweetly and lazily, earning him a happy smile from his husband.

“I should better clean my mess, don’t you think?” Dean says, as he pulls away from Castiel.

Castiel hums, not saying a word. Dean grabs the wipes and starts to clean the mess he left inside Castiel’s ass. He does it sweetly and carefully, and when he is finishes, he proceeds to wipe the mess of Castiel’s come on both of their stomachs.

“Come here,” Castiel says when Dean is done with the cleaning. He pulls Dean down, until Dean is on top of him. He gets his arms around Dean and holds him tightly. Dean smiles as he gets his arms around Cas and places his face on the curve of his neck, kissing it. “Was it a good celebration?”

Dean rolls his eyes but he snorts. “Yeah. I don’t know if you felt it, but I came in your ass, Cas.”

“You are an assbutt sometimes, Dean.”

Dean lifts his face to look at Cas and give him a cocky grin. “Yeah, I am.” He kisses his cheek and then gets his face back to where he had it before. He feels how Cas’ thumb moves onto his shoulder and it makes him smile. “It’s good to be home with you.”

“I agree.” He kisses Dean’s hairline. “I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

Dean’s hold on Castiel tightens and he sighs, happily.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the waiting. Here's the chapter. Thanks a lot for reading, for the comments, the kudos, the bookmarks and the subscriptions :)

Castiel used to complain about Dean being a morning person, but the truth is, that Dean has never been a morning person. Yes, he tended to wake up in a better mood than Castiel, but that was because Dean didn’t have a morning routine, he didn’t have to be anywhere specific expect for some hunts, but now that Dean has to wake up before eight A.M., he is no longer in a good mood.

But Castiel is even worse than Dean when he has to wake up at that time.

“I hate mornings,” Dean mumbles as he spreads some homemade jam on his toast.

“Now you finally understand me,” Castiel mutters before yawning. He pours their coffee in two different mugs. “Do you have full turn today?”

“Yeah.” He bites the toast and the sweet taste of the jam makes the morning a little bit more tolerable, but not too much. Castiel hands him his mug and Dean says, “Thanks, Cas.” He takes a sip immediately, loving the taste of it and the feeling of caffeine in his body. “Today’s your last day working at the Harris’ house, right?”

Castiel hums as he sips his first coffee. He still needs two mugs to wake up. At least. “I think I’ll be done by midday.”

Dean now works as a mechanic in the only garage in the town. It is owned by Lilly, a young woman who didn’t give a damn about Dean not having any kind of title. She made her repair one old car to see what his knowledge was, and she hired him because she saw that Dean knew what he was doing and fixed the car without any difficulties. The work in the garage is sometimes tight, and Dean sometimes has periods when he has to remain at home for almost a whole week, but the job is good. He loves it and Lilly is a really nice young woman who also happens to share some of Dean’s music tastes. And she also pays a nice amount of money.

Castiel now works as a gardener and a carpenter. He doesn’t own any kind of title about gardening, but his knowledge is incredible, and he has become the best gardener in the town. He works on his own, and he is called whenever someone needs his work. Sometimes, when there is need to build a house, Cas is always there to help with the plants, but he also helps with anything that has to do with carpentry. Dean was gladly surprised when he found out that Cas was good at making things with his hands. His job is also a bit tight, given the economy crisis. Plants are expensive, and it is a luxury not everyone can afford, but in between gardening and the sporadic carpentry jobs, Cas is doing good and getting some money, and he also helps people with charity work. It doesn’t pay, most of the times, but Castiel is always willing to help those in need. Dean joins him sometimes. And once in a while, the two of them work in the town’s library too.

They don’t have to pay for rent or bills regarding the light, the water or the internet. Dean still doesn’t understand how Cas’ mojo actually managed to do that in the past and how it still lasts, but he doesn’t question it, because it really helps them to be less stressed about money. All the money they gain is spent in food, something they need to buy for the house, gas for the Impala and Cas’ pick-up truck, or doctor bills if they ever go to the doctor.

“Do you want me to make you a sandwich for lunch or are you gonna come home to eat?” Dean asks, looking at how Cas pours a second mug with coffee. He offers him a toast with jam and Castiel gladly grabs it.

“I’ll come home to eat,” Castiel answers before biting the toast. He makes an appreciative moan and Dean grins. “I don’t have much left to do, so I’ll be back here in time for lunch.”

Dean hums. He drinks the remaining of his coffee and walks to the fridge to get some bacon for the BLT sandwich he is going to make for his lunch. As he starts pouring some oil onto the pan to fry the bacon, he catches Castiel staring at it. “Let me guess, you want me to leave you a BLT sandwich for your lunch at home, right?” He arches his eyebrow and smirks.

Castiel blushes and hums, trying to keep a straight face. “You just said it, not me.”

“Dick,” Dean says, laughing.

“Assbutt.” He grabs the two mugs and kisses Dean on his cheek on his way to the sink to wash both mugs. “I was thinking about stopping by the hardware store to get what we need to build the chicken coop. Unless you want to come with me.”

“We can go after I come back from work.” He sets the fried bacon on a plate after turning off the gas and he proceeds to make the BLT sandwiches. “You’re capable of grabbing the most hideous paint for the coop.”

“I was thinking about an orange base with purple dots,” Castiel deadpans.

“I wanna divorce you.”

Castiel grins. “Sure, honey.”

Dean chuckles.

They finish their breakfasts and then they wash and dry the dishes, proceeding to brush their teeth after they are done in the kitchen. It’s their usual morning routine from Monday to Friday, unless one or both of them has a day off.

“Have a good day at work, Dean,” Castiel says, leaning onto Dean, who meets him halfway so they can share a brief but sweet kiss.

“You too, Cas. See you later.”

Castiel nods and walks towards his pick-up truck while Dean gets into the Impala. Dean always leaves the garage first, because, even though Cas is a good driver, he doesn’t want any risks of getting his baby scratched.

Dean drives to town, followed closely by Cas. They could go in one car, but it’s easier this way. Cas has all his gardening stuff in the pick-up truck, besides, they never end their working schedule at the same time, so it’s better to just head back home when they are done instead of waiting for the other.

Dean reaches the garage soon, parking his beloved Impala in the spot reserved for him. Lilly is waiting outside, smoking a cigarette. She has blue hair and is in her thirties. Dean likes her attitude. She’s charming and encouraging. She is also teasing with everyone who works there, but she also knows when she has to be serious.

“You’ve got a 1972 chevelle SS waiting for you, Dean,” Lilly says when she sees him coming through the door. “Mike wanted it, but we both know he digs Fords more. You’re the Chevy guy.”

Dean scoffs. “The Chevy guy? We both know I can fix any kind of car.”

“Yeah, yeah. But Chevys make you all tingly.” She gives him a playful glare, and Dean can’t help grinning. “What are you waiting for? That chevelle ain’t gonna fix itself.”

Dean’s grin only widens. “At least let me leave my lunch in the kitchen.”

Lilly smiles as Dean walks towards the kitchen, to leave his sandwich in there. “See? Chevys make you all happy.”

Dean laughs. He really adores working here.

 

_____

 

“Hello, Dean,” Castiel greets when Dean opens the door.

“Hey, Cas,” Dean says, approaching Cas, who is sitting on the couch and reading a book. He leans down and Castiel tilts his head up, meeting him in a kiss. “How was work?”

“Good. Yours?”

“Good, too.” He turns around and walks towards the kitchen, to get himself a snack, and he notices the slice of pie waiting for him on the counter. “Did you get me pie?”

Castiel hums. He turns his face to look at Dean. “Ms. Harris lives in front of a bakery. They had pecan pie, so I bought you a slice.”

Dean walks back towards Cas and kisses him, deeply, cupping his face. “I love you so fucking much.”

“It’s good to know that you only love me because of food.”

Dean glares him. “Don’t be a dick.”

Castiel grins. Then, he kisses Dean again, sweetly. “Eat it, take a shower and then let’s go to the hardware store before they close.”

“Love it when you get so bossy.”

Castiel rolls his eyes but he smiles.

Dean eats his pie, but instead of eating it in the kitchen, he eats it on the couch, next to Cas, while they chat about their day. The pie is really good, although Dean likes his better, but Cas bought him pie, so he is not going to complain about anything.

After finishing it, he takes a quick shower. Working in the garage always leaves him sweaty, and he always takes a shower when he comes back home. If he and Cas happen to arrive at the same time, they take said shower together. It doesn’t happen often, given their schedules, but sometimes one of them waits for the other so they can enjoy the shower together.

By the time Dean is clean and dressed, Cas is waiting for him at the end of the stairs, holding the Impala’s keys. He hands them to Dean, who steals a quick kiss from his lips before they walk to the garage.

“We should start looking for a place to get the chickens,” Dean says as he drives.

“I have already checked a place,” Castiel says. “Jamie recommended it to me. It’s in another town, but she says the chickens are cheap and in good conditions.”

Dean hums. “I’ve never taken care of chickens, or any kind of animal. I don’t know if I’m gonna know how to take care of them.”

Castiel places his hand on Dean’s thigh and gives him a reassuring squeeze. “You’ll do great, Dean. Besides, I know several things about chickens, and most animals. We are going to take care of them together, so the odds of failing are minimal.”

“You thinking about getting more animals? As if we had a farm?” They talked about getting chickens because they would save money on eggs, and both of them like fresh eggs, not the kind of eggs that they get in the supermarket. The farm market comes every month, but some of the prices are too high.

“Not really. I think chickens will be more than enough. Other animals take too much time and effort. But I wouldn’t say no if you wanted a cow or a pig.”

“Nah, I think chickens will be more than enough, too.” He nods, and then he chuckles.

Castiel frowns. “What?”

“We’re talking about getting chickens. Fuck, I never thought I would even discuss about this, ever.”

“If it makes you feel better, I never thought about this, either.” He gives him another soft squeeze and Dean grins.

 

_____

 

“Do you have any work for tomorrow?” Dean asks as he and Cas leave all the building material for the chicken coop in the garage.

“Not for now,” Castiel answers. “You know I barely get any jobs on Saturdays. Why?”

“We could start building it tomorrow,” Dean suggests. “We got the whole weekend.”

“Yeah, we could. But don’t make me wake up early for that.”

Dean chuckles. “I know better than that, Cas.” He gets his arm around Cas’ shoulders and pulls him against his side, kissing his temple. Castiel smiles and rests his hand on Dean’s chest. “I’m gonna make some hake for dinner, how does that sound?”

“Perfect. Should I make a salad?”

He pouts. “I was thinking about making some French fries.”

“How about we leave French fries for the weekend and make some burgers?”

“Alright, you convinced me.” He smiles and Castiel kisses him. “Let’s start, I’m hungry.”

“You are always hungry, Dean.”

“I’m not always hungry. When I finish eating, I’m not hungry. That’s obvious.”

Castiel laughs, and it warms Dean’s heart.

They always make dinner together. And they always cook with some music. Dean tends to shake his hips to make Castiel grin and give him that lovely stare of his. They have such a great time when they are together.

When their dinner is ready, they sit around the table and eat. It is their routine. For some people it might seem boring, but both of them come from a life where they barely could have this, and their routine seems like a blessed thing. They are both happy with their simple lives. And they couldn’t ask for more.

Castiel washes and Dean dries, like they always do. Then, they sit on the couch to watch some TV. There isn’t too much on a Friday night, but they just sit and cuddle together, trying to find something enjoyable. They end up watching a nature documentary, and only decide to go to bed when it is over.

“It might rain tomorrow,” Dean says as he looks through the window.

Castiel approaches the window and looks at the night sky. The moon is full and it makes the gathering clouds visible. “Probably.”

Dean nods and walks towards the bed to start taking off his boots. Castiel soon goes back to the bed and starts to take off his, too. “It feels good to know neither of us has to wake up early tomorrow, right?”

Castiel huffs. “You always say that every Friday night.”

“That’s ‘cause I love that feeling of knowing I can linger in bed for as long as I want to. And I know you do, too.” He looks at Cas with a mischievous smile, and Castiel rolls his eyes, but he smiles.

“You are an assbutt.”

“Yeah, I know.” He chuckles and gets in bed. Cas joins him a moment later and switches off the lights. “But you still love me, though,” Dean says as Castiel snuggles against his side.

“Of course.”

Castiel kisses him, softly, but deeply, and Dean cups his face, humming into the kiss. The ex-angel slides on top of Dean to kiss him properly, placing his hands on Dean’s jaw. They only pull away to get some needed air, and then, they continue kissing, holding each other.

Their kisses grow hotter and more passionate, and it doesn’t take them too long to start getting hard. Dean sneaks his hands under Castiel’s t-shirt and starts pulling it up, so he can take it off.

“Wait,” Castiel says, pulling away from the kiss. Dean frowns, confused, and then, Castiel switches on the lights. “It’s better when we can see each other,” Castiel says, blushing a little.

Dean grins. “Fuck yeah.” He takes Castiel’s t-shirt off and they kiss again, breathtakingly.

The rest of their clothes get removed, easily and quickly. Castiel presses himself against Dean, making their hard cocks rub together and both of them moan and groan. Dean’s hands trace Castiel’s body, desperate to touch him everywhere, loving the warmth of his skin and the shapes of his strong body. 

Castiel begins to kiss Dean’s jaw, feeling his stubble against his lips. Dean closes his eyes and moans when Cas begins to suck the skin of his neck while his hands linger on Dean’s nipples, touching and rubbing them in the way Dean loves it. He rolls his hips, wanting to give Cas that pressure of their cocks together, and it earns him a wonderful moan.

Castiel looks at him, and Dean smirks before they smash their mouths together, kissing each other as if their kiss was the only thing that makes them breath. And when they pull away, they smile at each other before Castiel slides down Dean’s body and wraps his lips around Dean’s cock.

Dean moans and gets his hands on Castiel’s hair. He rolls his hips, matching the bobs of Castiel’s head. He moans Castiel’s name loudly, tugging his hair every time Cas gets the head of Dean’s cock against his throat, moaning around it. He hollows his cheeks and swirls his tongue, and Dean’s whole body arches at the feeling.

Castiel pulls away with a wet sound before kissing the head of Dean’s cock. He smiles when he looks at Dean, who is wrecked and flushed. He cups his face and prompts Cas to kiss him on his lips, and Castiel happily does it, kissing Dean, opening his mouth so Dean can get his tongue in.

As they kiss, Cas gets his hand in the drawer and grabs a condom and the lube. He pulls away from the kiss to put the condom on and spread the lube on his cock and on his hand, being watched by Dean. When he is done, he leans onto Dean, who kisses him sweetly, as Castiel easily gets one finger inside Dean.

He keeps adding more fingers, slowly, not wanting to rush things up. As he works his fingers inside Dean, he keeps kissing him, mostly on his lips, but he sometimes kisses Dean’s neck or he sucks at Dean’s earlobe.

“C’mon, Cas, I’m ready,” Dean moans when Cas has four fingers inside him. “Just fuck me, love.”

Castiel smiles. “You are so attractive when you are this eager.”

Before Dean can snap him, Castiel sucks his earlobe and Dean moans. Then, he kisses him and pulls his fingers out, wiping them on the sheets. Dean immediately wraps his legs around Cas’ hips, opening himself for him, seeking the pressure of Cas’ cock against his hole.

Castiel aligns against Dean and slides inside him, making the two of them moan at the feeling. Dean closes his eyes and tilts his head up, biting his lip as he feels Cas filling him. He is soon fully buried inside him, waiting for Dean to adjust around himself, and as they both wait, they kiss. Castiel cups his face, his thumbs moving soothingly on Dean’s cheeks while Dean caresses Cas’ nape and back.

When Castiel feels Dean is ready, he starts to move, and both of them start to see stars behind their eyeballs.

They have done this countless of times, and they will do it for a another bunch of countless times, and it still feels amazing, it is the best sex Dean has ever had, because it isn’t just sex when it comes to the two of them, not even when they are rough, because they always put so much love and passion in it every time they do it.

Dean kisses Castiel, he always kisses him. He tries to kiss him for as long as he can, and Castiel does the same. They love kissing while they fuck.

Castiel thrusts in and out of Dean with a steady pace, changing his angle a little so he can hit Dean’s prostrate, making Dean moan loudly and ach his back, clenching around Cas so tightly, that the ex-angel loses his rhythm for a moment.

Dean looks for Castiel’s hand, wanting to hold it, and Castiel quickly finds both of his and they link their fingers, resting their hands on the pillow. Castiel kisses him, sweetly and passionately, and Dean kisses him back, like he always does, never stopping the maddening roll of his hips, meeting each of Cas’ thrusts.

Their pace increases, becoming both desperate, and both of them know they are close. Castiel thrusts a little bit harder, as if he were on a mission, reaching Dean’s prostate over and over again, and Dean clenches tightly. Castiel starts moaning in enochian, burying his face in the curve of Dean’s neck, until his orgasm hits him and moans Dean’s name, coming inside him. Dean follows him immediately, coming and moaning Cas’ name loudly.

They only stop their movements when they are done with their releases. Dean collapses onto the bed and Castiel collapses onto Dean, both panting, unable to move, and still holding hands.

“I love you,” Castiel says with a breathy voice. “Dean, I love you so much.”

Dean smiles and sighs happily, giving Cas’ hands a soft squeeze. “I love you so fucking much, too, Cas.”

Castiel kisses his cheek and then nuzzles it before burying his face against the side of Dean’s face, breathing hard. Dean moves his arms so he can hold Cas, and Castiel slowly slides down his, resting his hands on Dean’s chest.

It takes them a little to recover their breaths. By then, Castiel kisses Dean and pulls away from him. He removes the condom, knotting it and throwing it to the bin before he grabs some wipes to clean Dean’s mess.

As Castiel cleans them both, Dean looks at him, caressing Castiel’s hip. His hand moves up, reaching the place where Castiel’s heart is, and he spreads his palm, feeling his heartbeat. Castiel bring his hand to Dean’s hand.

“Making sure this is real?” Castiel asks, a slight worry slipping into his eyes.

Dean nods. “It still feels unreal, you know?”

“Why?” He lies next to Dean, and gets his arm around his shoulders, pulling Dean against him. Dean rolls and gets his arms around Castiel’s middle, resting his cheek on Castiel’s chest.

“Because I’ve never been able to be this happy, Cas.” He sighs and closes his eyes. Cas has his hand on his shoulders, and his finger move onto his skin, caressing him, while his other hand combs his hair, lazily. “The little happiness I managed to have disappeared quickly. Now, I get to be with the man I love, to have a happy and normal life, and sometimes it feels like I’m dreaming.” He opens his eyes and looks at Cas. “Maybe I got kidnapped by a djinn.” He chuckles.

Castiel glares him. “Don’t joke about that.”

“Sorry.” He kisses his collarbone, then, he rests his chin on Castiel’s chest and looks at his eyes. “It’s kind of troublesome, right? I’ve been so used to not having anything I really wanted for decades, to know that happiness was something I couldn’t have that when I finally get everything I’ve dreamt of, it feels as a dream, and I’m fucking scared that I’m gonna wake up, and you aren’t gonna be here ‘cause I dreamt everything.”

Castiel cups his face. “Your life was never easy, Dean. It’s understandable that you still feel that everything we have built together might disappear one day.” He caresses his face and Dean can’t help leaning onto his touch. “But I can promise you that I’m not going to go anywhere.”

“I know,” Dean whispers. He grabs Cas’ hand and kisses his palm. “I know, Cas.” He tilts his head and kisses his lips. He sighs happily and snuggles against Castiel. “Do you— do you ever have any kind of thoughts like that?”

“Sometimes,” Castiel confesses, holding Dean tighter. “Sometimes I think some monster might come and find us. Or that Heaven will come after me and force me to leave you. But then I always remember that no matter how, we always find our way to each other.”

Dean smiles. “You big old sap.”

Castiel chuckles. “I just told you the truth, beloved.”

“Yeah. I also think about that when I think about what might happen. I’ve lost you tons of times, but you always came back. You always do. That’s reassuring.”

Castiel kisses Dean’s head.

“Are you happy?” Dean asks, looking at Cas.

“More than I have ever been, Dean.” He smiles and caresses Dean’s face. “Are you?”

Dean grins. “Of fucking course that I am happy, Cas.”

Castiel mirrors Dean’s grin and they kiss.

“I love you,” Dean says.

“I know,” Castiel replies. Dean makes a funny grimace. “You love it when I Han Solo you.”

“Yeah, but it also frustrates me a little.”

Castiel chuckles. “I love you.”

“I know.”

Both of them grin and share another sweet kiss.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here it is the last chapter of the series

“Hey, Cas,” Dean greets as he comes back home.

“Hello, Dean,” Castiel says as he stands up from one of the kitchen’s chairs. He walks towards Dean and pulls him into a tight and needed hug.

Dean hugs him, but he frowns because he notices that something isn’t completely right. “Cas? What’s wrong?” He caresses Cas’ back, soothingly, trying to calm him.

Castiel buries his face on Dean’s shoulder and breathes, deeply. Dean waits for Cas to finally be able to speak; he knows that Cas needs some time, so Dean doesn’t say anything and just holds him, feeling how Cas calms in his arms, slowly, but he does.

The ex-angel eventually pulls away from Dean’s embrace, looking ashamed. Dean holds his face, thumbs caressing him.

“Hey, don’t worry, it’s okay, Cas,” Dean says, sweetly. “What’s wrong, babe?”

“I—” He takes a deep breath. “I just finished writing my angelic memories.” He moves his eyes to the kitchen table and Dean looks at the journal for a moment before looking back at Cas.

“You okay?”

He knows that writing those memories was important for Cas, but it was really hard. He has been forgetting more and more of them, but the journal helped him to not completely forget about them. And now, Cas is done with his memories, and Dean knows it might feel strange and scary to be done with them.

“Yes, I’m fine,” Castiel answers.

“You sure about that?” His husband doesn’t look too fine for him.

Castiel nods and smiles, looking at Dean. “I just feel overwhelmed by the whole thing.”

“Yeah, I get that. C’mere.” He pulls him into a tight embrace again and Castiel hugs him back, fisting the back of Dean’s leather jacket. “I’ve got you, Cas.”

“You always got me,” he whispers, with a touched voice.

“Always will.”

They remain like that for a while, holding each other. Once again, Castiel is the first one to pull away.

“Thank you, Dean,” Castiel says, pecking his lips.

“Everything’s gonna be okay, I promise.” He cups his face and presses a lingering kiss on Castiel’s forehead, making the angel sigh.

“I know.” He grabs Dean’s hands and kisses his knuckles. “I love you.”

Dean smiles. “I love you, too.” He pulls him into a tender kiss. “You wanna make cookies with me? I know that always makes you feel better and takes your mind off.”

“I would love that, Dean.”

“Good, but first, let me take a shower. Wanna join me?”

“Yes.”

 

_____

 

“I can’t believe you managed to keep them alive,” Sam says with a surprised voice as he looks at the chickens.

Dean rolls his eyes while Castiel presses his lips into a thin line, suppressing a smile. “Don’t be a jackass, Sammy.”

“Dean’s actually quite good with the chickens,” Castiel informs.

“They actually like me better,” Dean teases, looking smug.

“Sure, honey.”

“Don’t sure honey me!”

Castiel grins and gets his hand on the small of Dean’s back and kisses his cheek, making Dean blush. “Blush suits you, Dean.”

“Shut up,” Dean mutters. “Alright, Sammy, you done with them? It’s almost dinner time!”

“Yeah, Dean,” Sam says as he drops the remaining food onto the ground so all the chickens can eat.

The younger Winchester brother decided to pay Dean and Castiel a visit, given that he has some days off from the animal shelter he works at. Every time he gets some free time, he goes to see his brother and his brother in law.

“You guys talked to Charlie about Thanksgiving?” Sam asks as the three of them get back inside the house.

Castiel hums. “We talked to her last week. She and Maggie are arranging everything to be able to come here.”

“Will you get a day off?” Dean asks, looking at his brother.

“Yeah, I will. Don’t worry.”

Dean smiles and nods. “Awesome.”

Castiel closes the door behind him while Sam and Dean head to the kitchen. Dean is going to make some stuffed bell peppers, using all the vegetables from their orchard. Even though Cas insists that they both contributed to make all those vegetables grow, Dean knows that Cas is the one who should get all the credit, because he is the one who works harder on the orchard and who teaches Dean everything. Dean is learning, step by step, and he is getting better, but Cas is the master when it comes to orchards and gardens.

“Feel free to bring some of those with you if you want to,” Castiel says, pointing at the tomatoes. “And anything else you want to.”

Sam grins, still smelling the tomatoes. “Thanks, Cas. I’ll get some before I leave.”

“But leave us some. You’re gonna go all fanboy over the rabbit food and leave us with nothing,” Dean says, with a mocking smile.

“You, Dean Winchester, is afraid of not having rabbit food? I never thought I’d get to hear something like that coming from your mouth.”

Castiel grins, and dedicates a lovely smile to Dean, who simply rolls his eyes.

“Bitch.”

“Jerk.” Sam chuckles and then he turns his face to look at Cas. “Seriously, what did you do to him? He’s never liked anything that came from an orchard unless it was part of a burger.”

Dean glares Sam, ready to snap him, but Castiel talks first, “I think it’s something that happens when you get old, Sam.”

“Fuck you, Cas,” Dean grunts.

Castiel chuckles and pecks Dean’s cheek, nuzzling it as he gets his hand on the small of Dean’s back one more time. “He just needed to cook vegetables to start liking them, I guess.”

Dean shrugs, casually. “Yeah, I guess.” He begins to empty the bell peppers, and Castiel begins to chop some of the vegetables that will go into them.

Sam hums, and looks at the two of them, with a soft smile on his lips.

“What?” Dean asks, catching Sam’s mysterious smile.

“You two look like an ordinary married couple,” Sam answers.

Dean and Castiel look at each other, with an amused grin. “I don’t think there’s anything ordinary about us,” Castiel states.

“Yeah, we don’t do ordinary,” Dean agrees, grinning, then, he looks at Sam. “We do have a normal life, but that’s all. It’s better to be weird, right, Cas?”

“Right, Dean.”

“You two are so sappy,” Sam says.

“Shut up, Sam,” Castiel and Dean say at the same time, and the three of them burst into laughter.

 

_____

 

Dean wakes up in their bed, with a silent gasp. His heart is beating really hard, hammering against his chest, wanting to escape. His body is covered in sweat, but he feels chilly. And his breathing is ragged, as if his lungs were about to fade away.

He takes a deep breath, trying to make the nightmare go away from his memory, but it still feels real. He rubs his eyes and then, he looks at Cas, sleeping soundly. One of his arms is stretched on Dean’s chest and his head is close to his freckled shoulder. His chest is pressed against Dean’s side, and Dean still has his arm around Cas’ shoulder, holding him tightly. He looks at his husband, safe in their bed, and Dean can’t help shedding some tears and letting out a silent sob.

He kisses Cas’ hair, and closes his eyes, focusing on the feeling of Cas’ skin against him, on the soft breathing brushing his shoulder and neck, and then he looks at him one more time, caressing his hair before carefully untangling himself from Cas. He sheds some tears, but he immediately wipes them from his face.

Dean makes sure to cover Cas; they made love before they fell asleep, and as always, they didn’t get dressed after it, so Dean makes sure to cover Cas so he doesn’t get cold. He sighs and caresses Cas’ face.

“I love you,” Dean whispers.

He gets up, gets his robe and his cigarettes and walks out of the bedroom.

Even though things are quite good, sometimes there are cracks in their lives. Sometimes Dean still gets nightmares, and so does Cas. Sometimes Dean still feels like shit and believes Cas could do better. Sometimes Cas gets sad because of his past angel life. Sometimes the two of them argue about something. Sometimes life hurts. But still, they make it through. Together. And when one falls, the other is there to pick him up.

Dean opens the backyard’s door, switching on the light of the porch. The night is cold, and with every breath that Dean takes, mist appears in front of him. He should have put on more clothes, but he doesn’t intend on being there for too long. He just needs some fresh air and to light a cigarette to calm his restless heart.

But before he grabs his cigarette and lighter, Dean clutches the black feather hanging around his neck. Cas gave it to him years ago, during Dean’s birthday, the first birthday he had since he and Cas started dating; it feels so long ago. And as he holds it, part of him soothes. Dean doesn’t know if there’s some grace remaining in that feather, but it always makes him feel a little bit better when he touches it.

He inhales and lets go of the feather, finally grabbing the cigarette and holding it between his lips while he lights it up. The smoke appears in the air with his first puff and blows away, fading away. He rests his shoulder against the beam, and watches their garden, slightly illuminated by the lightbulbs. It doesn’t take him too long to let some tears out.

“Dean?” Castiel asks from the threshold of the door.

Dean knew it was going to be a matter of time before Cas found him there. “Sorry for waking you up,” he says, without taking his eyes from the garden.

Castiel walks until he is next to Dean, resting his hand on Dean’s shoulder as Dean extinguishes the cigarette. “Nightmare?”

Dean nods.

Castiel gets his hands on Dean’s face, cupping it and tilting it so their eyes can meet. “Are you okay?”

“No,” Dean answers, with a broken voice.

“Dean,” Castiel says, hugging Dean, who starts crying and hugs his husband, fisting the back of his robe. “I’m here, Dean. I’ve got you, beloved, I’ve got you. It’s okay, I’m here.”

Dean cries, keeps crying until he has let out all his pain. A long time ago, he would have been embarrassed by this. He would have grabbed a bottle of whiskey and he would have gone to his bedroom, holding back tears, until he knew everybody was asleep so he could cry, hating himself for being that weak and that vulnerable. But everything is different now; he can cry and be weak and vulnerable in front of Cas, because Cas understands, Cas knows, and Cas doesn’t judge. And he always remains there with Dean, helping him to put himself together. And Dean does the same when their roles are reversed.

“Fuck, I’m sorry,” Dean says, pulling his face away from Cas’ shoulder. He sniffs and looks at Cas, who cups his face again. “I’m so sorry you still have to put up with this.”

“Don’t apologize about that, Dean,” Castiel says, sweetly, but there’s a slight annoyance in his voice; he hates that Dean thinks it’s necessary to apologize about this. “It’s more than normal to have nightmares and to be affected by them. Your life has been full of nightmares.”

“Yeah, I know.” He sighs, and rests his forehead against Castiel’s. “I just wish they could just go away.”

“I know, Dean. But I’m afraid you will have to live with them. Both of us will have to.” His thumb caresses Dean’s cheekbone. “But as long they’re just nightmares, we will be okay.” He pecks his lips, briefly, but sweetly.

“I love you. You know that, right?”

“I might have a slight idea about that, Dean,” Castiel deadpans, making Dean grin. “I think I started to get suspicious about that when we got married.”

Dean chuckles, brightly. “You’re awesome, Cas.”

“Thank you, Dean.” He leans and kisses him again, this time for longer. “You’re awesome, too.” This time, Dean initiates the kiss, and both of them smile into it. “And I love you, too. Did you know that?”

Dean snorts. “I don’t know. I’m not good at the whole feelings thing, but I guess I suspected it a little.”

Castiel smiles. “Assbutt.”

“Yeah.” He kisses him again, tightening his grip around Castiel’s waist. “Thank you for always putting me back together. And— and for always being there when I most need you.”

“Always, beloved.” Castiel kisses him, softly, and Dean melts into the kiss. “You’re always there, too. When I need you.”

“Always will, Cas.”

Castiel nods. “Let’s get inside before we get sick.”

“Yeah. Okay.”

Castiel grabs his hand and they lace their fingers, easily. “Do you want me to make you some hot chocolate?” he asks as they get in the warmth of their house.

“I just wanna go to bed and try to get some sleep.”

“Of course.”

They go upstairs, holding hands during their path, only pulling away when they have to take off their robes. Then, they get in their bed, and Castiel immediately holds Dean in his arms, pressing him close. Dean sighs, happily, nuzzling Castiel’s neck as the ex-angel covers the two of them.

“Better?” Castiel asks as his thumb rubs Dean’s back, soothingly.

Dean kisses Castiel’s neck. “Yeah. Much better.”

Castiel kisses Dean’s hair and tightens his grip. “You’re cold,” he teases.

“Deal with it, love.”

Castiel’s grip tightens and he smiles. “Sweet dreams, beloved.”

“Sap.”

“You love it.”

“Yeah,” Dean whispers, nuzzling Cas’ neck. “I really do.”

 

_____

 

Their weekends tend to be filled with things to do, like buying groceries, fixing the Impala, working on the orchard, the garden and the chickens, cleaning the house, doing laundry… But they always find some time to watch a movie, read something, take a walk, and sometimes Dean even finds some time to take a small nap, usually on Sundays. And that’s what he did after they had lunch and washed the dishes.

Dean wakes up in their bedroom. He looks at the window, noticing that the sun has finally appeared in between the clouds. He smiles and then he gets up, walking downstairs. He sees Cas, sitting on the stairs of the porch, reading, and Dean grins. He grabs two beers from the fridge and walks towards Cas, who looks up from his book and greets Dean with a smile.

“Did you have a nice nap?” Castiel asks, placing a bookmark in between the pages and closing his book.

“Yeah,” Dean says, before handing Castiel a beer.

“Thank you, Dean.” He smiles and then, he fists the front of Dean’s t-shirt, pulling him down so they can meet in a kiss.

Dean can’t stop grinning after it. Then, he sits next to Cas, and opens his beer at the same time as Cas does it. They take a long sip, sighing after it, and then, Dean notices that Cas’ boots and socks are resting on the ground, and his feet are bare, touching grass and soil.

“You’re such a hippie, Cas,” Dean says, chuckling.

“You love it,” Castiel snaps.

Dean snorts. “Sure, babe.”

Castiel rolls his eyes, but smiles.

They look at their garden. Some of the chicken are wandering around, grabbing any bug they can find on the grass. They barely make any sound, which lets Dean and Castiel to hear the rustle of leaves of the trees, and they can also hear the soft and distant sound of the sea.

“I like this quietness,” Castiel says, after a while.

“Yeah, me too,” Dean agrees. “You really found an awesome place to live.”

Castiel smiles and looks at Dean. “I just wanted you to have somewhere where you could forget about hunting and be happy.”

Dean looks at him, meeting his eyes. “We weren’t together yet. Did you think that we were gonna be here, like this, someday?”

“Not really. But I thought that one day we would take a vacation here. Once things were quiet. I didn’t allow myself to get my hopes up.”

“Yeah, I get that.” He offers him a sympathetic smile, and Castiel smiles, gratefully. “I’m glad things turned out the way they have.”

“Me too, Dean.”

They kiss, meeting in the middle, humming into it.

“Is this everything you ever wanted, Dean?” Castiel asks, almost brushing his lips with Dean’s.

“No,” Dean answers, and Castiel frowns. “This is much better,” he adds, with a big grin, and Castiel mirrors that grin. “What about you, Cas? Is this everything you ever wanted?”

“No. This is much fucking better,” he says.

Dean bursts into a bright and loud laugh. Hearing Cas swear always makes him laugh. He puts the beer on the floor and he cups Castiel’s face, kissing him deeply and passionately. Both of them moan and hum, and Castiel gets his hands on Dean’s neck, his fingers brushing Dean’s jaw.

“I love you,” Castiel says, breathy.

“I love you, too,” Dean says, matching Castiel’s voice.

They smile and rest their temples together as they lace their fingers, watching the garden one more time, both of them being in love and feeling so damn happy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading, and for all the kudos, the comments, the bookmarks and the subscriptions. The series is finally over after so many years. It's sad to let it go, but I'm happy that I managed to write a story for so long. I just love Dean and Cas and I want them to be happy.
> 
> Anyway, thanks a lot to everyone who has read. You're all amazing. I'm really grateful.


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